Undramatically

Gazette Meme

2012-01-08T23:34:00.003+08:00

I shall do this! Hehehehehe.
1. Name
Roycelyn

2. Birthplace
Singapore

4. How did you first come across Gazette?
Vic intro me to watch their Cassis MV, thats when I got hooked.

5. Who's your favourite member?
I love Uruha! But recently hopping back, I take occasional peeps at Ruki.

6. What do you like about your favourite member:
Uruha is such a dork! Actually I can't remember why I love him so much, mostly because he's always so pretty. I like his beauty in a artistic way, he's always just sooooo good for stock photos if you get what I mean. Hahhaha! I swear when he smile, his smile could light up the whole town! Oh and, just got a thing for guitarist!

Ruki, maybe because his recent photoshoot really caught my eyes. The way he portray himself is really something which I feel it's just so artistic!

7. Something you don't know, but would like to know about that member:
Still wondering how Reita looks like right now under the noseband. I wonder if he ever washes the band man, I mean it's the same one since god knows when! Unless he has many which he can change whenever he wants.Just also really very curious how they go around their personal lives.

8. Which of the members have you written letters or fanmail to?
Uruha mostly, and I wrote in english! Wonder if he understood! I written to Reita too before.

9. Something about you that changed when you became a fan of Gazette:
They very much didn't change part of my life, but they did change my perspective and mindset. My design style was mostly inspired by them and also by their songs. My FYP work right now was also partially inspired by the song Taion. Because of Uruha I took up playing guitar because I wanted to play Cassis so badly. Hahahaha! And several other nicknames and such. Because of them I also met alot of friends whom I still keep in contact with!

10. Your favourite Gazette song and why:
I always loved Cassis from the start until now! But I have too many favourites! I do like their older songs such as Anti-Pop, Reila, Nausea and Shudder, BEST FRIENDS, Filth in the Beauty, Taion, Maximum Impulse, LINDA ~candydive pinky heaven~, Dorodake no Seishun, Chizuru and many more! Until the point which I stopped liking them for a period... But think DISORDER and NIL album was the best shit that ever happened. Recent songs are not bad as well, I was really impressed by PLEDGE.

11. The song you'd like to hear most at lives:
I want to hear Cassis live! They never did play it after NLSG! I would seriously cry!

12. The song you listen to when you feel down or sad:
Erm, songs which are much more upbeat. I would sing along with it dramatically! Hahhahaha! It would definitely bring up my mood.

13. When you are ill, the song that makes you feel better:
None. I don't hear them when I am ill. Hhahah! This is so weird.

14. The song you listen to when you are happy:
I hear my favourites when I'm happy, duh. Hahha! Actually doesn't depend on the mood and what songs I would hear. Actually I have a horrible habit of looping songs.

15. The song which influenced you the most:
Taion. It might be related to the the murder of junko furuta, it was sad but I could relate so much to this song. I know everyone seems to think differently and think that songs such as Saraba and Wakeremichi ... I like those songs but still I rather would say Taion.

16. The first Gazette song you ever heard:
Cassis.

17. Is there a song you can sing perfectly without having to look at the lyrics? Yes! I can sing FILTH IN THE BEAUTY, Guren, Cassis

18. A Gazette song you'd like to sing at Karaoke:
BURIAL APPLICANT, Filth in the beauy, [reila], Guren, SILLY GOD DISCO, Taion, Chizuru and what else? I don't remember.

19. Have you seen Gazette live?
NOT YET. BUT I WILL ONE DAY, YOU WATCH ME.

20. If you have, what were your thoughts? If you haven't, are you planning on attending a live and how?
Fuck this, if it wasn't for FYP I would be flying to Tokyo tomorrow and watching their Venomous Cell OMEGA Final next week at Yokohama Arena.

21. At violent Gazette lives, where do you always stand? Or if you haven't been, where would you like to stand?
I would love to stand towards the right side of the stage? Hahhaha! Closer to Uruha the better! Hehehhe :3

22. What style do you (or would you like to) attend Gazette lives in? (Clothes, make-up, etc)
Normal clothes, I don't think I will go and draw thick eyeliner. My look is a lieeeee, as always.

23. Name a few necesseties for attending a Gazette live:
Friends! I need to attend a concert with people who also like Gazette as much as I do! Camera would be good too, I can snap pictures of their live! Water, or else I'll die from screaming.

24. Do you (or would you) always fill out the after-live questionnaire?
I would.

25. Something you've started collecting because of Gazette:
Magazines, DVDs, CDs, posters...

26. Which Gazette costume series do you like most?
Cassis, Taion, Chiruzu, BURIAL APPLICANT, VORTEX, REMEMBER THE URGE.
Can't seem to stand outfits that Uruha shows his thighs? And also especially in SUICIDE CIRCUS, I hated his outfit - stupid flowy dress.

27. One item you like in Gazette's goods range: (Or if you don't own any, one thing you'd like to have)
....... None so far. Actually have the cheap fake imitation of the BLACKMORAL white jacket which I threw away because the quality sucks. Gonna get my white VC Iphone cover soon! My first official merchandise! Hehehhe!

28. Your cellphone's ringtone:
I use to have Cassis, it was my ringtone last time.
I recently set PLEDGE as my ringtone.

29. Your cellphone's wallpaper:
Now? Lock screen is Ruki, but Home screen is Uruha.

30. Cellphone strap:
Nope.

31. PC wallpaper:
Uruha's ABYSS&LUCY pamphlet, goddamit he looks so pretty that I had to make a wallpaper of it on my own.

32. Does your email address have something to do with Gazette?
No. Lol

33. A place you go to frequently:
Kinokuniya for SHOXX, FOOLS MATE, NEO GENESIS, ARENA 37C. Used to go, now no.

34. Your favourite shop:
Don't have.

35. Your favourite CD shop:
What is this?

36. A magazine you read frequently:
SHOXX, CURE, and ARENA 37

37. Recommended CD:
DISORDER or NIL album.

38: Do you have pets?
Yes?

39. Do you visit the Gazette OHP frequently? Which page within do you visit the most?Not really, but if I go I would see the member's profile for their photos.

40. An artist other than Gazette who you think is noteworthy:
Kagrra, Alice Nine, SID<

41. An artist you like out of those signed to PS Company:
SID

42. A member whose words you were surprised by: (in a magazine article, MC, radio show etc)
"Also the interview where Kai said he slept naked, and where Kai said eroticism is like Pandora's box, it should never be opened, which Reita responded that he opened the box every night...I wonder how he knew that..." << Read it off the person who did this before me, ok shocked. Hahahhaa

43. If you could become one of the members for a day, who would you become and why?
I think I would be Ruki. Wouldn't mind being short for at least a day, omg I'm so mean. Hahah! And because if I am Ruki, I can sniff Uruha's hair anytime I want during lives.

44. If the world ceased to exist tomorrow, which member would you like to spend your last day with?
Uruha. Needless to say, it's so obvious that I would spend it with him. Kekeke.

45. Which member would you like to go to karaoke with?
.... Actually all of them. You know I would love to hear Uruha singing "Linda Linda" especially through my very own ears?

46. Which member would you like to go drinking with?
Uh, Uruha? Cause he likes drinking. But too bad, I don't drink so I guess this will never happen

47. Which member would you like to go to an oshare bar with?
Erm, I don't know. Maybe Ruki.

48. Which member would you like to cook for?
Kai; he will judge my cooking and teach me how to improve or even guide me along cooking!

49. Please arrange the members according to who you think would change the most when drunk (least changed to most changed):
Uruha, Aoi, Ruki, Reita, Kai.

50. Please arrange the members according to who you think would make the longest telephone calls from shortest to longest:
Reita, Aoi, Uruha, Ruki, Kai

51. If you had to substitute in a Gazette live, which part would you choose to play?
Guitar. I only know how to play that instrument and I cannot sing Gazette screamy songs for nuts.

52. One thing you like about Gazette (physical):
VERY interesting height. It's like tall tall short tall tall. Hahahhaha! And of course their smiles are cute too!

■RUKI SERIES■

53. Your first impression about Ruki:
Didn't like him at first, couldn't get use to his voice.

54. What name do you call him by?
Ruki

55. Are you good at drawing?
Erm, not really. Actually depends on what type of drawing.

56. Have you fallen off of a jungle gym?
Hahhaha! I don't think I ever climbed on one.

57. If Ruki were really your brother, friend, lover etc, how would you feel?
I cannot see him as my lover, he's way shorter than me. As a brother, I would look up to him! He's just so artistic! And as a friend, I think we would make good buddies!

■URUHA SERIES■

58.Your first impression about Uruha:
WTF WHO IS THIS DUDE, SO PRETTY I DON'T EVEN ... *NOSEBLEEDS LITERALLY AT HAIRFLIP IN CASSIS*

59. What name do you call him by?<
Uruha, Urupon, Darlinggggggg ~, My Husband (now currently known as my ex-husband lol)

60. Did you know at first that his name was pronounced "Uruha"?
Well, Jasmine use to pronounce it as "you-ru-ha" then I change to that pronunciation before I started calling him "Oo-ru-ha" again

61. Do you gargle every day?
No.

62. If Uruha were really your brother, friend, lover etc, how would you feel?
Heheheh, actually I cannot imagine him as my lover even though I always use to claim that he was my husband. I'll be forever in despair thinking that my lover is prettier than me? I will feel so inferior! If he is my brother I will cling onto him foreverrrrrrrrrr. Maybe we'll make good friends too but I don't think I can keep up to his drinking habits.

■AOI SERIES■
63. Your first impression about Aoi:
..... Cannot comprehend what is this guy dancing and spinning around with the guitar?

64. What name do you call him by?
Aoi

65. Do you have a lip/navel piercing?
No.

66. Were you born in the city?
Uh... Yes?

67. If Aoi were really your brother, friend, lover etc, how would you feel?
Actually I don't really like Aoi but I can imagine him as my lover somehow. It's weird but I felt that he was a potential kind of lover which i would choose among the rest of the gazette members. As a brother I will show him respect and as a friend, maybe I think soso only.

■REITA SERIES■
68. Your first impression about Reita:
No nose boy?

69. What name do you call him by?
Reita. Uncle Reita.

70. What do you call the thing he wears on his nose?
A noseband...

71. Out of the Shinkansen, which do you think is the fastest?
I don't know.

72. If Reita were really your brother, friend, lover etc, how would you feel?
... Never came across my mind as a lover. A friend maybe yesssss and a brother, I will have a kick ass brother and I would have seen through the noseband through our young days. Haha

■KAI SERIES■
73. Your first impression about Kai:
Uhh. He seems so plain as compared to the rest .___.

74. What name do you call him by?
Kai

75. Are you good at cooking?
Yes I can cook. It is edible so which means my cooking is average. I prefer baking.

76. Where do you think the state of New Jersey is?
... Somewhere in the states.

77. If Kai were really your brother, friend, lover etc, how would you feel?
I think there is possibility that I would go for Kai as a lover as well, he's just so sweet! And as a brother he would be someone which I would like to pick on, but I am sure he will pamper me as a little sister too eh!

Duh duh duh.

2011-11-28T01:41:00.002+08:00

Today I am going to talk about palmistry dabbing alittle on it only and about my pathetic self.

Okay, if you are interested in palmistry please visit this website, so I basically realized certain things which I never much understood myself. I believe in such stuff, it's abit silly but I find them interesting. Since I missed out my chance on fortune telling during AFA, so I decided to help myself out alittle but understanding myself.

I read out one part which I thought was very much true was the part when my index fingers did not hit the bottom tip of my middle finger; this shows that I am a person who really lacks confidence. So I asked myself that question, was I really someone who lacks confidence and I guess the answer is yes.

I hate to leak out certain things, but I guess it would be fine since it's blogger anyways. I sinned envy for the longest time and I always get so upset when people would choose other people except for me. I questioned myself, am I really one of the worst choices around? Or what does the other person have which I do not possess? This explains the time I spent to make myself much more capable. In case you are wondering what I meant by "better myself", is it so take up random shit and making it into a skill. Something like a plus point to my very own being.

Let's say cooking and cleaning for example, now we know that most girls rarely knows how to cook and clean - vacuum floor, wash clothes, cook a decent meal out of anything that is in the fridge. Maybe I stereotype, but from what I heard from most people, girls around my generation are unable to do that. So, having the ability to cook and clean, I try to tell myself that I have better qualities than other girls so maybe perhaps I would have become a better choice! I am actually doing this to cure my insecurities somehow. But no, it seems as though that woman being too much of a headstrong person, let alone being able to do something which a guy can't do or even surpassing them on that would definitely turn them off. We know men and their egos, they just sometimes cannot overlook being lousier than a girl.

So what has this become? Still a failure somehow isn't it?

FLOW + AFA11

2011-11-15T03:55:00.010+08:00

(left to right : Koshi, Keigo, Take, Iwasaki, Goto)
I LOVE FLOW!

I need to update this! Because AFA11 was the best shitz that happened since Linkin Park concert!
I have put FLOW up to the level that I love love love them so so much! They are such nice people to talk to! I shall blog about my experience with FLOW and others!

Friday was the start of AFA and I was assigned to Moe Moe Kyun Cafe to help out with Jim. But the cafe only starts on 12th November so I was just there for briefing and before that I was selling AFA shirts outside the Halls. There was a Miku concert going on so I had to sell and there are so much people outside! I wanted the I love Anisong concert shirt myself too maybe I can ask Lyana for one!

Anyways, since the briefing ended and I had nothing to do but I thought that I should hang around because I want to check out the exhibitions. Yanting has to set up a booth so I was free and Aiko asked me to do some housekeeping. I was given a job as a housekeeper for the artist rooms, placing water, towers, power adapter and making sure everything was ok. FLOW was coming to rehearsal that night and I really want to see them live! Just in case the next day I was so busy with MMK that I can't watch.

So I was lugging around huge plastic bags with all the shitz inside to clear the room, I cleared FLOW's room first as they were coming back. I placed everything so nicely and adjusted the chairs and all, so I headed over to Aniki's room to clean up which is just opposite. Thus, I closed the door when I was in Aniki's room. After cleaning, I came out and I met face to face with the FLOW members entering the room! They appeared one by one, and they said hello to me! I was so dumbfounded that I just smiled and bowed because I don't know what to say and my face was burning up with redness which i could felt! Ugh, so shy at that point of moment! Fangirl mode was on! I wanted to die on the spot and just like die! They greeted me and entered the room, so I continued with my stuff with cleaning the rooms.

After getting the stupid ironing board from Danny Choo's room, I have to bring it to the show management office, on the way I met Take-san! Oh my god, I swear my favourite was Keigo-san but because of this incident I swayed alittle towards Take-san! He spoke to me in japanese which I totally did not understand! I was like smiling like a doofus while he talked and not understanding a single shit he was saying. Then I told him I didn't understand so he beckoned me to follow him, then he stopped in front of this container then he pointed at it and spoke more confusing japanese words. Then I was still clueless so I was smiling and shrugging my shoulders with the 2 stupid ironing board in my hands with a plastic bag of tissue box. Take-san opened the container and inside was a few cans of Coke Light, then he pointed to the coke can and further spoke more japanese then I finally understood that he wanted to drink the coke. HAHAH! oh my god, he was so cute! Cause he keep laughing when I didn't understand him!

I didn't get much chance to talk to them, I went to walk around and 3 members from FLOW also went to walk around. Take-san, Keigo-san and Got's-san were walking around too! And I wanted a photo with them! Even though it was not the full FLOW but I wanted so I asked Jim if I could get a photo with them, he say I should go and ask them. So the walking around was actually trying to bump into the chance to photo with FLOW! So it didn't work until about 45 mins later I finally puckered the courage to do so! And Jim was sooooooo "happy" to help me take photo with them. I swear he was like "Crazy fangirl!" Eep eep! After taking the photo and I thanked them! Keigo-san said "You're welcome" in english! So they went back and I actually saw Koshi-san walking around by himself. Poor dude, like foreveralone.

So I sat the first row for their rehearsal! I saw Keigo-san sitting at the corner taking photo of the stage! But it was quite far back, soon later he just went to the stage when they started to tune the musical instruments. So later Koshi-san came over and sat down with us! Can you imagine how much I want to cry from happiness at that moment?! He was talking to Lyana and his english is so damn awesome! He got this accent which does not make him sound like a japanese speaking english! But unfortunately Take-san can't speak english like his brother or else he could easily told me he wanted coke! I forgot when we are sitting down did I talk to Koshi-san at all or not, totally cannot remember!

Picture of FLOW having their rehearsal which it hasn't started yet,
Koshi-san was not even on stage! You can see Got's-san at the concert with Keigo-san sitting on the box and the one sitting on the box on the right is Take-san! Yes, I think I'm allowed to upload that one up, I copyright it in case someone steals the photos or something.

They performed certain songs and I thought it would be weird if I stood up and cheer so I had to sit down while they performed! So cool I swear, and the whole entire hall is empty! Feels like FLOW is singing to us only! Take-san was so cute on stage! He made such cute faces at the camera!! Then I saw Koshi-san made a jump split! I remembered the photo I was supposed to use for FLOW had him doing a jump split! So it was real he could do it, I thought it was fake! Hahaha!

Koshi-san came down and talked to us again! He asked how was the rehearsals! Then Lyana introduced me saying that I am a huge FLOW fan! Koshi-san was like "Ohhhohhh!" then he asked me something in japanese which I totally cannot understand! And just before the concert started some guy also sat down next to me and spoke japanese also! Everyone thinks I look japanese but I think I look way too chinese to be japanese! So Koshi-san tried to translate what he wanted to say to me, took him a while and later he said "What is your plan for tomorrow?" Ughsajdhaskdhak your english is so good! Koshi-san english-pai japanese idol! I like I like! :D And also an idol asking what a mere fan is doing during AFA! Wow, I never felt so happy! So Lyana told him that I would be at MMK and he was like "Ahhh ahh! Moe moe kyun!". Me and Yanting had to leave because it was 4am in the morning and I need to be at work at 9am! So we left Koshi-san said by and Keigo-san who was standing somewhere near Koshi-san also said bye to us! Idol saying bye to us, I am in heaven!!!!!!!

I dressed very nice the next day (12th November) because I knew FLOW was coming to visit the cafe so I was preparing myself to look pretty! Hahahahha! But in the end they didn't come I was so sad ;_____;

I went to watch their concert with Jasmine and some of the butlers after work but the butlers left after LiSA's performance and I was getting ready to cheer for FLOW. Saving energy! So when FLOW came on stage, it was crazy I swear! I was crazy I was screaming like fuck! FLOW rocked the whole entire Anisong concerts! Not being biased but the energy of the crowd for FLOW was damn good as compared to the next day's concert! They started with Hey!!! and ended with GO!!! which later all the fans were calling out for encore including myself because everyone was crazy and they wanted more from FLOW! So we shouted! And not to mention during the concert, I wanted to melt into a puddle of wibbles after seeing Keigo-san dancing in stage! It was so freaking cute which I cannot comprehend! Take-san was very very cute too when he introduced himself! He made everyone danced with him when he wore the glasses with LED lights on them!

So FLOW came out for Encore! Yes! Of course, how can they not sing their famous song COLORS?!!?!

I was so high on FLOW that I needed to see them again so I waited for everyone to leave when they have their autograph session after that, so me and Lyana were like putting our arms on the barricade and stare at FLOW as they gave out handshakes and their autographs! It was like those girls looking at handsome guys kindda of dreamy look when we looked at them! So there was extras left and they gave us the autographed posters! It was so awesome! So I wanted to get them to sign on my CREW tag but I don't think it was possible.

I went backstage and I saw Keigo-san standing outside so I greeted him and told him that his dancing was super kawaii! And he was like laughing while saying "Kawaii?!?!?!" but it was so cute and I was melting! Then Koshi-san came out from the room and we talked to him again. He asked how come we are here, then we told him me and yanting are part of SOZO as organizers! Then we started to talk to him! He asked us if we ever went to Tokyo! And I told him I wanted to go Roppongi! He laughed! He's such a sweet and nice person to talk to! Plus he speaks English! I also asked him when they were flying off then he told me the next day because they got a show on Monday in Tokyo! Awwww!

We sent FLOW off and me and Yanting actually wanted to exit the building but we did not know how to, then we saw Ferlyn and Shawn exiting so we followed and I asked Ferlyn where she was going and she say supper with FLOW! Eeep! I wanted to go! And I was so enviousssss! Then when we about to head out, Shawn called me and Yanting to follow for Supper with FLOW! Oh my god oh my god oh my god, we are so lucky! So Shawn drive us to somewhere in Tiong Bahru for supper! Actually, I was feeling alittle awkward and I was asked that I need to behave and not fan girl when eating with FLOW. Ok, I kept my promise! I didn't fangirl!

FLOW must be thinking why this 2 fangirls keep appearing everywhere! I think they think we are machaim stalkers! So we got Jim to introduce us to FLOW as part of SOZO! Me and Yanting took photo with FLOW! So cute! The photo is actually now my desktop wallpaper! Yanting was trying very hard to get Lyana to introduce her to the light technician! Which she told Koshi-san that Yanting likes the light technician and she wants a photo with him! Then Koshi-san was so nice to introduce Yanting to Suzuki-san that is his name. Hhahaha! She was so embarrassed! And I help her to take 2 photos, but she didn't dare to put it as her profile picture!

I took a solo photo with every each one of the members of FLOW! The first one was Koshi-san! He was the most approachable and besides he was talking to Lyana and the rest so it was much easier! I opened up the poster and I saw that Koshi-san made a very very cute drawing on my poster! And someone bend my poster! I was so annoyed!!

Finally, after waiting for so long Keigo-san was free because he was talking to Miyano-san for the longest period of time!! So he came over and I showed him the poster with the drawing! He pointed out which was his signature! Then I finally got a picture with him! Ugh, finally omg! Keigo-san why so hard to talk to you! ;____; Take-san also was busy all the way talking to Kaname and Usagi! So I managed to get a picture with him also much later! I asked Take-san how was the coke yesterday and he didn't understand me! ;____; then spoke to me in japanese again and I didn't understand and I told him with a sad face and he laughed at me. Omg, so cute! Oh and, I got tonnes of famous people's fingerprints on my phone! I also a picture with Iwasaki-san who was busy talking to Suzuki-san across me and Yanting, she have a good view of her Ikemen!

Koshi-san came to talk to us again! He found out that he was designers! And we asked him why didn't he pursue being an illustrator! Then I told him about the buses which I designed and I wanted to use the picture of him which he did a jump split! He laughed cause I told him that he will be on the second floor of the deck if we used that one but we had to change the image because they wanted the newest image of FLOW and the one I had was for 1/3の純情な感情 single. So I used the one which they wore orange for Hey!!! single! The one which I had a hard him slotting because of the angle they were standing! So I told him my frustrations that I had to change the photo and he laughed, it seems like he really wanted to be a designer because he was so keen on hearing what we did for AFA! We also told him that we wanted to go Japan to study! Then I think I mention something wrong such as "Benkyou"? I thought that was study in japanese but I don't know because Koshi-san gave a very shocking reaction when I said that. So we told him that we wanted to study in Japan!

At that point finally I could photo with Got's-san! Finally! But the lights all turn off and it was so dark I could not photo with him! And Koshi-san was the one who helped me take the photos with my phone, but the phone's flash didn't work when he's using it! My phone fangirling over him also that it's malfunctioning ahhaha! Then finally got some light and we managed to take a picture but my eyes were closed -_-! So we thanked FLOW and they drive back to the hotel! Then we managed to get a cab back later because Miyano-san and Ryohei-san gave up their cab for us to go first! It was such a memorable night spent with FLOW, Kaname, Usagi and the SOZO and Dentsu crew! Eeeep!

The next day I managed to watch Kalafina live! But it wasn't as high as FLOW, god knows why same for May'n. Maybe I was tired because I was not sleeping enough and I needed to work and stand the whole day! I also went to the after party over at Newton Circus! I thought Kalafina left but they didn't! And they had dinner! I couldn't photograph with them because their management was rather strict so I managed to get them to sign my AFA shirt! It was so awesome! I know people are dying to slaughter me but yes! And I also got a camwhore photo with May'n! Lucky bunch to be working for AFA! I am truly so happy!

Keigo-san! From Answer Pv, damn he looked so good in this MV that I went to get the HQ!

One day, need to go back SOZO and buy big big presents to thank them for the best internship ever even though the process was shit, but all these made up for the time spent! I am truly happy! And now, I am obsessed with FLOW!

The only one who failed chinese in the whole class.

2011-11-07T04:09:00.007+08:00

Yes, I'm such a cheater bug again. I got codes from blogskins. Hahah!
I am lazy ok, and I'm not really good at coding blogspot stuff without a basecode.
p/s, I'm not a Bieber fan even though I thought that the song was rather nice.

I fulfilled my dream!!! I've never been so proud of myself! After around 5 years I finally got around to buy an acoustic guitar! Wooop! For the record, 5 years and still I didn't fulfill some wishes that was in the list, except for world domination which will never come true, unless I'm running for the US presidential campaign and I'm officially sitting in the white house. Ugh, too much influences from The Ides of March.

Moving along, since it's already November I'm going to check back the new year's resolution which I did earlier this year during the start of 2011. Need to see how far I've come! I also backtracked some of my blog post and to find out some ridiculous things which I used to blog about. And and and and, made an interesting discovery.

2011 New Year Resolution :

~~More money will roll into my pocket~~

Increase my GPA, ~~work hard on portfolio, go for OSIP.~~

Mum and Dad to be healthy

Step on karma till it kneels down and beg for forgiveness.

Make people not to treat me for granted.

Be more influencial.

To be a superwoman, able to withstand all setbacks no matter what.

FYeah SIP money! I am rich now, thus I went to buy my acoustic.
OSIP my foot. Even though I managed to get in the OSIP list, but it didn't came true.
At least I still managed to fulfill 2 by the end of the year. I feel good!
For the others, I don't think some will be there forever due to certain circumstances aka my parents being healthy etc. And yes! I still believe in karma! For all those that treated me like shit will perish in hell HAHAHAHAHA! Ok, I was just kidding. I don't really meant that even though somehow deep down I wish! :P

Anyways, surprise surprise! Guess when was the date which we had our TP Open House this year? 15th January 2011! Wow, Roy you good! Didn't know your eye-candy can last so long until all the way till November! Ahahahhahaha! Ok, this is embarrassing >_<

So far, the second eye-candy in school since I started Poly. There is something wrong with me, or it's just that I don't really like looking around at guys in school. Too engross being a workaholic! Well, I didn't know that person existed in the Design School through my years studying there, I know I'm a freaking n00b! As compared to SPENCER(不怕说他的名字—）whom is my stone-ish first eye-candy in school which I met in the library, I did not attempt to be friends with the current one until some people just had to add their legs and hands to invade my life and randomly just add him on G+. You good, Yanting!! Your karma for me bullying you about J and KY right?!

Damn annoying that all your friends knows him and you don't, all your friends know him damn long and you only know he existed this year. Fail lah. It's also very irritating that people are now making fun of me because of this and also whenever I click Twitter or Facebook(?!) that he would be under suggested friends; social media are you in conspiracy with my friends?!?! I feel damn paranoid that I feel that his name is everywhere and it feels like I'm stalking him but I'm not ;__;

God bless the days to come when I keep seeing him in school. D:
And if I ever be friends with him, watch out for the list of people who will like our friendship status on facebook. Fml.

Verge of giving up when you stood back up.

2011-10-06T00:42:00.005+08:00

Wooooop, I guess everyone actually knows that this is my motivational song since long ago when I had to study O Levels and I changed the lyrics accordingly. And yes, I do loop the song often during the Poly days when I feel unmotivated to do school work and it works pretty well.

I can gladly say that I wash my hands off the major project which I have been doing since 1 month ago, it officially ends today when I submitted the FA to the printing company. I am officially labelled as the "prints department" in my company despite that the weight of each file is so huge and I hate waiting for my comp to process or save it. I think future print jobs will be passed on to me :(

And obviously, we know that we have times when you get so stressed up at work and feel so upset with your work as it gradually looks ugly to you. And your boss chases you for work everyday even at 12am in the midnight, you felt like you wanna throw your laptop at the wall or smash it with a hammer to give an excuse of "Sorry, I can't get it done because my comp *CRASHED*". If I cannot finish my work which I always worry I would get very very upset as the stress of people chasing you makes you wanna cry. Not to mention that you have to keep changing stuff here and there.

So for celebration purposes, I am officially announcing that I washed my hands off the "Cool Japan" project. Wooop! And they asked me to attend the reception tomorrow at ION Sky maybe because I worked so hard for them?! Going there would make me see the ugly backdrop banners which I was forced to finished within 3 days, ugh! I left my comp on for 2 nights because of this project within the 3 days.

I'm going to talk about the Cool Japan project, (let me shamelessly showoff abit) there is going to be 4 section which Cool Japan is on going this year.

Ganbarou Japanese Food Fair @ Takashimaya on 8-9 Oct.

Harajuku Street Style @ Tangs Orchard on 8-9 Oct.

Travel fair ... god knows when, end of October I think?

And finally last and not least, Anime Festival Asia 2011 aka AFA11 on the 11-13 Nov @ Suntec City Convention Halls 403 - 405!

For more information on Cool Japan please visit : CoolJapan Website
(lauching tomorrow! All designed by Jasmine who had to work according to my designs, I'm so sorry for the restrained freedom)
and more information on AFA2011 please visit : AFA2011 Official Web
(feel free to send in enquiries, Yanting will gladly reply you if your answers can't be found on the web)

You'll see my work around on buses, yeap! Service numbers 65, 143, 174 and they all go to town area. I did the buses for the Food Fair, AFA2011/ILoveAnisong, AKB48/ChapalangEverything. Please don't criticize my work, it's my first time doing bus wrapping and I had to learn many new things on how printing works for SBS Buses etc. Good news which slipped out my mind was that the buses are rolling out today and tomorrow (6th Oct)! Not really happy with my work but I'm excited to see it on the streets! I'm going to take a picture of it!

And also not forgetting lamppost banners! Like those which they put up during the F1 with all the special guest artistes performing printed on them. Yeap, I did for AFA11 which would be places around Singapore for 1 month at places which I don't even know. Lol. The colours were not chosen by me so please forgive the RED colour for the top and bottom because AFA is always represented in RED.

This sums up pretty much the hard work for this whole entire month of Internship. There were tears and sweat in this so please don't mock my work :'D

Everyone judges you.

2011-09-12T01:08:00.004+08:00

Don't understand why people make fun of my when I sing this song?
I am all psyched to watch Linkin Park and people mock my enthusiasm! :(
But the chorus keeps replaying in my mind,
Remember all the sadness and frustration, and let it go.

Please practice self-discipline at all times. Finish work with utmost effort for fulfilling satisfaction.

No matter how much effort you put in, someday it will somehow crumble down. You may want to cry but you can't seem to cry it out. Crying will not make anyone change their mind, unless it might. And if I were to cry I would most probably disgust some people. Totally not cute enough to pull off the moe crying look. And in actual fact, what you see in movies are not real because crying is never pretty just like waking up in the morning to see the person sleeping next to you have such a swell comforting face, it's all a lieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

Okay, let's talk about priorities. You go around seeing tumblr posts which reads "People would love you for your inner self, who no would judge you just by your looks". How stupid can people get because it doesn't really happen that way. How you look plays a huge part on how people treat you. Firstly, you need to be pretty. If you are not, who gives a fuck about you? You are pretty, people give way to you and let you have whatever you want. Even taking an initiative to talk to you, listening to you etc. If you are not pretty, who wants to even talk to you? You look the utmost not pretty and yet unflattering and who gives a rats fart. People who suffer such symptoms i.e Me, needs to learn how to "suck on it". There is nothing much you can do about it, unless you want to try plastic surgery then go ahead and be my guest. Make up can do wonders but not to the level which you can transform from an old hag to one of America's next top models. You still look the same with or without make up. And just to let you know if you were dating some guy whom is going out with you just for your look, you should just totally see his expression when you remove your thick layers of cake make up!

How much I hate to mention to people regarding my height, I am a tall being which I tower over people. Everyone says that they look up upon you, but in actual fact no one does. Girls, who in the right mind want to be SO TALL? I would gladly chop off my legs for you if you are willing to have them. Let's say just a random memory which I had around a year ago when Anwar told me this when I told him how I wished to wear something like Orange Caramel, y'know those cute polkka dot dresses with layers of cancan. And his reply was No, he cannot imagine me in it and I won't look cute in it. I am too tall to be considered cute. Maybe if I were to be put in a bear suit, maybe it might work.

"Whut?"

You see, if I were to cry and Sheena were to cry (I'm sorry Ah neeh, I have to use you as an example not that I am not doing this on purpose.) guys would actually would feel sympathy for her instead of me. Because I was somehow "bigger" in size than her. So as I can see guys like girls which are petit in size! They think that you are bigger in size which means you are stronger than other smaller girls and you can jolly well protect yourself. Bullshit. All girls are the same having all delicate feelings despite the sizes. Like I mention about priorities, this also links to it. I am dissing myself. I don't really care because I feel as though I need to voice some frustrations out within this week.

Tough week, very tough week. More of emotions going haywire thanks to many things that happened. How much I want to cry and I could not because it would be wasting energy and also I couldn't find any tears to cry out. How much effort you put in and it is all wasted and for the 3 weeks of intensive work, all not needed anymore. What was I doing? Maybe I felt as though the trust that I tried gaining was never even there before. Even if you work so hard and your colleagues think your work is nice, the client doesn't like it, you have to redo from scratch. Clients from hell. Totally can't wait to get out of this stupid industry.

I need some time off on the things which are clouding my mind and I feel very depressed this whole entire week. Nothing much that I could do about it because I don't really know how to start explaining why is this feeling lingering thus, I can only pray that this week would be better! Hopefully no more setbacks and also give me some time to relax and chill in the office can?!

U KW WHEN U R NOT APPRECIATED...

2011-08-07T04:31:00.004+08:00

BABY KYLIE AND ESTHER ~~PREGGY~~ MAMA!

Yesterday Esther gave birth to Kylie! So she missed out on yesterday's gathering dinner. Well, initially she texted all of us while we were at work that she was heading over to the hospital cause the doctor broke her waterbag as she was going on labour. Everyone was so excited that they couldn't concentrate on their work but I got a submission dateline over at 4pm that day and I was rushing even though my mind was flying over to Esther's. I am so happy for her and Shane! Today we headed down to visit her and we brought her stuff! She lost all her weight and she has no more belly to rub on anymore, haha! But baby Kylie is so cute! I carried her and she started crying, I cannot carry babies for nuts my own kid will suffer next time!! But Kylie was so fragile and light! So cute! Now we all are going to wish Kylie to grow up to be a pretty and good girl and follows her mother to eat Chilli Tapioca whenever on titbits snacking!

I am starting to think whether I am too linear with guys around me or whatsoever, or maybe it's just my face or something which clearly stamps all over "please treat this piece of junk for granted" or "whatever, I don't think this piece of junk minds at all". You all can joke with me, buddy buddy with me as your friends whatsoever, I am fine with it but the fact that I am still a girl afterall and I want some respect please as one.

#1.

I bought his birthday present ... let's emphasis on this ALL THE WAY FROM KOREA. Because I thought it would be special since it's the 21st birthday y'know. Even to my dismay that I don't like buying things from that shop but I still did anyways. Yeah, I thought of him ALL THE WAY IN KOREA. Hmm. Okay, I think people might know that I was supposed to head over to Tokyo for internship but it was called off suddenly (yeah, fuck my miserable life) so I told him that I want to meet up with him before I fly off. His reply to me was "Meet for?". I hate assuming but it sounds like it is such a chore to meet up with me and I must have a reason to meet up, so if it's not logical then don't meet since we have nothing much to talk anyways. Ok, so I told him that I want to pass him his present, then yeah mundane replies.

After many weeks of struggling with my school assignment and trying to find a job and also hoping that some other company at Tokyo would hire so I did not actually managed to contact him or either tell him that I was not going to Tokyo. Thus ok, since it was finalised that I won't be heading anywhere and yet staying in Singapore so he asked me when I am meeting him on msn. So I told him that I am staying in Singapore and not going overseas already. And his reply was "So?" I was about to bitchslam my keyboard at the computer screen at that moment, I know you are not half-assed interested in my internship and shit but please at least sound alittle more polite in your reply. So it was testing my patience at that moment and I controlled my typing and gave a very calm reply saying that I can meet him any time because I wasn't going overseas and it was more flexible?? So he suggested on Saturday afternoon, and I just told him that I will confirm with him later and I didn't reply anymore.

Friday night, just yesterday. I texted him that I was able to meet him on Saturday afternoon since I was heading down to see Kylie and Esther and his reply was "You meet me for?" I was outside and I wanted to bashed up the wall and kick over trash cans, picked them up again and kick them over and over again. I was so DAMN FRUSTRATED (emphasis) AND ANGRY!! Or rather also shocked. Then I calmly texted back again saying that I want to pass him his present.

I was late today, yeah like around 20mins because I totally forgot to cut the price tag out etc and I was also rushing up on Esther's card so I left home late. I thought we could have lunch over at Bishan and I wanted to tell him that I am struggling trying communicate with him but another text came in saying that he has to leave at 3pm to meet someone or I-don't-know-what-is-going-on thus asking me to hurry up and I was suppose to meet him at 2pm. Frustrating thing is that, I want to actually also celebrate his birthday with him like have lunch/dinner talk talk abit but it just always doesn't HAPPEN because he would always either have to go off or is meeting someone after he meets me. Thus today I did the same too - meeting people after I meet him. But I didn't know that he was even made further steps ahead of me. Fine whatever. So I got lost in the Bishan MRT station so when I headed out at Junction 8 control station all I did was just pass him the present and just left. Yeah and after that I had a hour of walking around aimlessly at Junction 8 alone, lunch alone while waiting for the others to arrive. The feeling is so .... /foreveralone. I actually got a text from him later saying that how nice of me to buy a present and thanked me, I should be happy yeah maybe last time but I was like whatever and I didn't bother to reply. LOL. I feel mean doing that but bahhhh, I feel so unappreciated! I am going to wash my hands off this already and I doubt I will see him anytime sooner so yeah, I will just leave it as it is. By the way, it's not the first time this sort of thing happen between me and him but this is the first time I am openly complaining about it!

#2.

Problem with this person occasionally happens mostly all the time and if you follow my blog, this is often a topic which I always bring up practically ALL THE TIME (for now)

This fellow here

is sleeping at the dining table while waiting for food!

I tried to tweet this picture but the 3G sucks on my phone so I couldn't emphasis my boredom during that 30 mins of wait. Usually I don't really mind but seriously I am still on a very very lousy mood with this fellow here and not to mentioned that the previously mentioned incident foul my mood up pretty badly also. The couple at the next table kept starring. Yeah, I can tell you why they were staring because he was sleeping at the table and I was just sitting across him staring at him sleep. People are like going "Wtf is this guy doing sleeping here and doesn't care about his partner" I am not saying that we are boyfriend or girlfriend but they just kept staring because I was doing absolutely nothing sitting across him and he was just sleeping! But thankfully after around 20 mins of staring at that fellow sleeping I actually took out my book to read which I should have done so earlier. I don't know how to say this but also I feel that it's kindda rude? Just saying. He only woke up when the food was here and he was all "gong gong" when he woke up and he seems rather dead when he was mixing the sauce on our salad. We actually ate quite quickly because we were rushing for a 9.30pm movie and the food only started serving at 9pm. I also actually made a mistake, I made us walk all the way to kinokuniya cause I thought I would buy the Avengers book but I didn't so we wasted time alittle.

I am not particularly angry on this because it's like I am immune to this idiot for some reason. Used to always feel like shit somehow over incidents and stuff. After the movie he was going to meet other people and also play ma-jong the whole night long and the day before he mentioned that he only slept around 7am or what. I am not stopping him for meeting his friends or whatsoever because it was not MY problem also in the first place and I don't want to keep mentioning that I think you do this or do that (ie: since you are so tired then go home and sleep, still play ma-jong for what). Makes me feel like some controlling mother or girlfriend or whatsoever. But the saddest and most disappointing thing was he can give up sleeping for meeting with his friends and ma-jong and yet sleep while with me. If he can say he can rarely meet them and always meet me but it doesn't give him an excuse to do so right? I think you get my drift. I am trying to be understanding here that he didn't sleep last night I know, but why forgo sleeping tonight for ma-jong and meeting friends (idk???)

Still trying to be understanding at the current moment but I also still very :( over certain thing that previously happened. Because of that issue I find it so hard to actually face him and only talk through text as it was easier since I don't see his face which makes me recall what I was reprimanded to apologize for making an opinion (let's not go into details on this part) and I was trying to suppress my unwillingness to talk or eye-contact for the whole day.

I still don't understand why guys keep doing this to me, I feel so no absolute respect as a girl or being treated like one here because they think they can just step all over my head for not no minding ALL THE FUCKING TIME. If it wasn't for me, other girls would have just walk off or just totally cut of all connection with the guys already. And yet I still managed to tolerate this type of shit and yet feel abit miserable and pitiful for myself as I feel so unappreciated :(

My current feeling now:

and

RIP : Isshi

2011-07-30T20:16:00.004+08:00

I never knew, until last Monday when it was announced all over that Isshi died.

It was shocking, and yet another great talent was taken away from this cruel world. I won't say it's a bad thing but all I could say is "wasted". I used to love Kargrra, alot back in those days when JRock was an obsession and now to hear that they broke up and now that Isshi's dead kindda makes me feel so nostalgia. I even bought their CD, which I never did once after I had those Kpop craze, I never once bought their CD except the 2AM one which I had to get the golden ticket for autograph signing session. The stacks and stacks of CD at home are all from JRock era which I would spend so much money just to get them, let alone pre-ordering them from Yesasia etc. My condolences to Isshi and family and the rest of ex-Kagrra, - Akiya, Nao, Shin, Izumi. I hoped that the path with Isshi was a well earned experience. All your fans are very very sorry for what had happened but we hope that you all will move on.

When I realised that I did not try to put in an effort to get things straightened out, I feel bad. But like I mention that I do not like taking initiative and that is a huge obstacle which I could not overcome. And I think I am also rather unforgiving of some sort, and I feel very very sore over some issues. Sorry I cannot do so now.

Motivation, you know I loop this song forever.

2011-07-24T02:13:00.002+08:00

Let's get down to business
To defeat Project 4
Did they send me slackers
When I asked for hardworking workers?
You're the saddest bunch
I ever met
But you can bet
Before we're through
Mister, I'll make sure you
finish your work

Tranquil as a forest
But on fire within
Once you find your center
you are sure to win
You're a spineless, pale
pathetic lot
And you haven't got a clue
Somehow I'll make sure you
finish this in time!

I'm never gonna catch
enough sleep
Say good-bye to those
who knew me
Boy, was I a fool in school
for cutting flash actionscript classes
This guy's got 'em
scared to death
Hope he doesn't know
that I'm not in class
Now I really wish that I
knew how to code

We must be swift as
the coursing river
With all the force
of a great typhoon
With all the strength
of a raging fire
Mysterious as the
dark side of the moon

Time is racing toward us
till the deadline arrives
Heed my every order
and you might survive
You're unsuited for
the rage of war
So pack up, go home
you're through
How could I make understand
the cons of procrastination?

We must be swift as
the coursing river
With all the force
of a great typhoon
With all the strength
of a raging fire
Mysterious as the
dark side of the moon

加藤くんー誕生日おめでとう～～！

2011-07-11T07:53:00.012+08:00

Happy 24th Birthday Shige! :D
Keke, 5 - 7 years since I first heard NEWS and you weren't my bias. Be thankful that you are now and also hearing NEWS! (Alongside with my forever long love for Linkin Park which I recently picked up again after Kpop and Jpop died down alittle)Hope you had a good one! While I'm struggling through P4 right now and wanting to cry at the work load which I have to tackle before I head over to Kato Kingdom!

Now, what to expect for the upcoming series for P4. Guess what Disney Princess this is. Purely on Macro 90mm and very little editing done. So happy it turned out well but this picture doesn't show the Bokeh effect which I managed to achieve. 3rd time since 3 years ago I bonded with Ian, sadly he's colour remained the same as I got him because he never came out of the box. He's actually way fairer than Hayden and Dahlia! I had trouble trying to photo him smiling then I realized that he was made to look fierce all the time, but I do love his side profile. I had other pictures of his side profile but I won't share it here for now. Prudence is also here to stay for the moment and Dahlia ain't happy because of some "history" between her and Hayden. She hopes that Ian would get to "play" on with Prudence because she doesn't like Ian very much either. BUt we all know that Ian's just as stone as his expressions are. *wink
Hoping to have more shoots with Ian sooner or later! :)

Seeya, at end of P4!
Harry Potter soon this week, note to self: Remind Edward Chi to book tickets!!!

You are NOT an exception for your disrespectfulness!

2011-06-30T05:11:00.006+08:00

Simple song to play, just a few chords changes and the same strumming method.
I can pick up 2 songs withing 1 hour class. Good or bad? But I think I am just so slow in learning things which leads to taking years and years just to master a skill.

Everytime I come back to this personal space, it's always something bad. I am so frustrated. I keep telling that I need to overlook but I cannot because it's always being "in my face". I feel like slashing people this instance! Actually it pisses me off when I think of it or else I would just be stoning the issue in my mind. I really really really hate people telling me "Oh, I got so many things to do. Damn sian." So what? Now that you tell me this, what do you want me to reply?

Reply (1) - Lol
This word is a very common if they have nothing to reply, the word lol has replaced the symbols "....." of being speechless. When people type that, they are not actually laughing, it's just that they don't know what else to type. If they are laughing it would be capitalized or emphasized : LOLOLOLOLOLOL

Reply (2) - Not my problem
I would love to answer people who direct such questions to me. Like what do you want me to do about it? Clear and make some free time for you? Don't be dumb, you have your own plans and if you feel like you have too many things on then cancel some. Your decision not mine.

So do not tell me that you have so many things to do blah blah blah because I don't give flying shit about you being busy. Complain that you have no free time then do something about it YOURSELF.

Or else what are you trying to imply? Trying to show off? That you have so much plans and you are of such high demand that everyone wants to meet your holy and majesty presence? Yeah, unless you are trying to tell me that I have pathetic amount of friends that don't ask me out all the time. Oh mind you, I don't give a shit about all the social dates that you have and neither do you have to rub it in my face. I love my small pool of friends which are close to me. Good friends I keep and meet OFTEN, other friends are all secondary and meeting them or not depends on the timing and how.

I think I mentioned before that I am rather a prideful woman. I hate being looked down as a woman let alone I hate guys treating us with no respect. Yes, you can treat me as your buddy buddy but always remember there is still a fine line drawn that I'm woman so jolly well respect me with it. Somethings you shouldn't say then don't say, don't say things that hurt our ego as woman. Woman is not always the weaker sex among Male and Female so stop your nonsense and treat me with well-earned respect as a girl. And also, prideful as always did I mention that I fucking hate feeling like a slut who keeps going back to you and you having so many other "girl-friends" around you? There is nothing between us, I am very clear of this but the feeling and the way I see it makes me feel so cheap! I feel like some whore that stays with the Casanova all time and it fucking makes me sick. It makes me feel as though woman just needs to rely on man all the time, actually no the way I see it - woman keep getting played out by man.

People would see us on Day #01 then on Day#02 they see you with another girl. I am emphasizing again that I am not jealous or whatsoever but I feel like my pride is yet so low and being stepped all over as a girl who is like "together" with some guy who is playing girls out. Like fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkk seriously. Feels like I'm here for your entertainment, and your stupid chess pawn(not to make me feel even more cheap, I shall upgrade my current status) and you can choose other of your girl pawns to play with any other time you want after you get bored of one. Tsk. Such a social butterfly. How would people see me as someone who sticks to you? I hate disappointing people so much but I felt as though that my X times of forgiving you has disappoint so many people around me that I think they start to lose faith in me. What to do now? I really hate being part of this whole act. Taking a step back from all the bullshit for now

And if you cannot stand being under the same umbrella as me that you have to keep mentioning that I should have found my own umbrella when someone teased ... then I'll jolly well just leave you alone and walk in the rain since you fucking hate me so much. I thought we came to a mutual understanding that there is nothing, NOTHING going on and get over it when people tease. Only immature like you would keep minding because your single-bility is at stake. Hohoho! From now on, stand 10 feet away from me.

Even though good times are really good that it makes me forget all about the bad stuff. But when it's on the bad side again, it is just definitely one of the worst which I finally gave up tolerating.

Oh and anyways, I'm back from Korea. :)

Tough thoughts

2011-06-21T03:55:00.002+08:00

I really shouldn't be doing this now because it's nearing 4am and I need to be awake soon like around 10am, I need to head to school regarding the SIP program. I need to confirm some stuff before I can feel so much a ease after reading the email which PJ sent.

Apparently I have not packed my luggage yet and I am about to leave for Korea in 1 day time. I like doing things last minute so I can practically remember all the things which I need to bring and not forget. And besides that, something which I need to bring I can only put it in on the day itself. First time heading off to other country without my parents! I have made several trips back from HK by myself but this is different! Finally able to go with friends overseas! Can't wait for Lotte World this Saturday!

For all the decisions I have made so far; I know I would have to face the consequences somehow and I cannot hide away from it. How much I want to tell myself that I am not really into design and I want to change my lien of career once I graduate and my chances are coming up but hindered by my design greed to work in an overseas company. I have to face so much problems and I know people are going to scold and be angry with me for alot of reasons because I am going back on my words but I really cannot help it. I have problems too even if I continue to stay in Singapore because of the timing and I am STILL however working for a company and not going on holiday during the August to October period so I cannot promise something so huge as early. Even now I hear about all the mumblings on how excited people are, I get a bit freaked out and I refused to mention as regards to my decision. Hopefully, it gets through and I will be able to have a eye opening experience for the 3 months over at a foreign country which I very much would like to visit there, well as for now. Wonder how high standard of living is over there.

Come Stai?

2011-06-03T02:52:00.005+08:00

One of those rare times which I come back and post something.
How is everyone really? I was prepared to die just last weekend on Saturday 28th May 2011 which I foolishly thought it was dooms day for all of us but I didn't know it was actually the week before that which I was rushing my crowbar submission. My thoughts of dying was dashed; not that I really wanted to die anyways. I was just thinking ..

Anywho, the rocky part is just very much over and I am glad to say that I am happy the way I am right now. It leads to fully understanding one self. I felt like I went through yoga sessions to understand inner peace - which is good. I (think) seem like a much more calmer person inside and outside. I can go on and on but I am going to sleep right now after I type this. Just to give a little update in case everyone thought I died. I'm hardly on Twitter also.

Billiards! Can you see who is winning?
Well, Zhen Jie's shooting the last 8 ball into the hole and guess what, I didn't even got a chance to hit my solid coloured balls at all! What can you expect playing with a person who plays it for 8 years! And this happened twice with the X number of games we played! Hahaha! I is Failz. No Zhen Jie is just damn good!

♕ is Kato san, for I am ♞

2011-04-10T04:57:00.003+08:00

Hi,
In case you're wondering how's life. Koyashige and also Shige alone plays around 1/4 of my playful mindset right now. Enjoying every bits and pieces of it as well.
I'm so sorry to say that I would not be updating this blogspot for a while. I like to keep things now rather personal as I'm going through a rocky time of realization point. How much I start to see things in a different light and also how I start to see certain people etc. I'm not going to openly share my thoughts for the time being. Don't worry I'm not having depression k, I'm still the happy ol'Roy you use to know except that I think my mindset is alittle different right now. I'm only keeping selective friends updated and don't feel too bad if it isn't you.

Bye.
I'm always there on msn when you need me. Or else, drop me an email at revenant.wingz@gmail.com

Thanks.

Turning point

2011-03-30T03:13:00.010+08:00

This.
An overly abused of triangles with horrible colour chosen for blending and also not doing justice to the model in the wallpaper.

You gotta do it, you just got to do it. This goes directly into the recycling bin. I have no idea how to save this "thing". It's most definitely an indescribable fail graphic design piece of mumbo jumbo which I have no idea how to conquer! Damn all the triangles! All the Illuminati! I'm heading over to circles and also pentagons from now on. But first, the last few tries for triangles. Hmm, I wonder if I would be able to try out picture blending, I've done that before but not recently and I don't like merging 2 totally different images together and ensuring the lighting for each person needs to be exactly the same. Anyways, I tried a new style of selective colouring and it's quite .... hard to control, I still think it's not going well with blue. It will be better in pink, but pink it so definitely not Shige. This is hard!! *ruffles hair

Comments anyone? On msn please.
I really hate image uploading software for now, they either keep resizing my images or else, reducing the image quality. Sucks-balls.

Anyways, I looked up the entrance exam for Aoyama Gakuin University and ... unfortunately I have to take a Japanese exam first before I can start to enroll into the school. I am considering taking up Japanese as a side language just for this because for the enrollment of law needs a short essay as entrance exam as well. Or else I can decide to head back to Hong Kong to attend University of a different career line. My design life has officially find it's stop on April 2012. My decision is yet final. 頑張って Roy for a fresh new start next year after graduation!

Just my two cents, how many of my classmates whom I know are actually carrying on their life as designers and struggle through sleepless nights . Yes, for some you can imagine seeing their works posted all around Singapore, why wouldn't most of them be doing advertising? Some people like me, for example could not help but to think that design life is NOT what they want to do in life thus I'm wasting 3 years of my life in Poly now in a nutshell. Everyone is talented in every other aspects also, like for example sorry to be pin pointing classmates - Priscilla; someone who is can project her voice so well why not be a news caster or lawyer? Indian Boyfriend is also a must to mention because I can jolly well see him in the office doing accounting in which his brain is very good for (calculative yet manipulative boy). What are we doing now? Seriously. What are we?

:..｡o○☆ﾟ Update です　･:,｡:..｡o○☆

2011-03-11T03:32:00.004+08:00

Photoshoot for Sebastian yesterday night with the school lighting which I borrowed and has to be returned tomorrow. The light was wonky! (((( ;°Д°))))
The screw inside it was loose and I thought I was the one who spoiled it when I did not even touch the lighting since photoshoot last friday. I tried fixing it but it was fruitless as the screw does not seem to fit back in. Will let the people at the equipment room know about it. （;´▽｀A``

Okay, so the shoot was mainly because I was playing with his blonde hair at first and it was when I pushed the fringe up to a fauxhawk hairstyle, thats when I think this new hairstyle suits him alot! Finally someone in my crew has Fauxhawk hairstyle! o(^▽^)o And my dearest 「4小さな饅頭の女の子」 (4 Little Maju Girls) which I did not upload their photos yet because I was so lazy to edit them. And besides I'm not free either. Full photoshoot of Sebastian will be uploaded on Livejournal which I was actually inspired by Shige's photoshoot actually, the one which I used to make the pyramid head effect. Will not upload the photos here, this is not my art dumpsite. Oh yes, facebook also have the pictures!

I'm a humble resident of Kato Kingdom, I stay, eat and shit there. I am a very proud patriotic citizen as well and I love the person who rule Kato Kingdom - Shigeaki Kato-san! (°∀°)b

Indian Boyfriend and me! ヽ(ﾟ◇ﾟ )ﾉ
I'm so unglam at home with no makeup at all and playing with my P3 props!!

言いたいだけ, 言いたいだけ,言いたいだけ

2011-03-03T05:02:00.004+08:00

I need to tell everyone that I'm slacking. Totally slacking, and I'm shaking my legs and searching random things online and not getting my work done. Feel so sinful, too much Koyashige and also Shige himself also. I went to get all the videos of the Koyashige performances and also Shige's solo performances as well. No wonder I can always say that I'm sidetracking at home. And besides, I have to admit that I actually watched a drama within these days. Actually it was just 7 episodes but I'm taking forever to watch it because I keep refreshing my internet for like a thousand times to get the video loading. Mio is PMSing, damn annoying. Thank god the internet isn't that wonky as last night, and I cramped in the last episode just today afternoon.

I went to school for just a 15 minutes briefing, such a waste of time and I didn't sleep that early last night either. Was trying to load the drama as usual. Shall blog about the drama, it is called Papa to Musume no Nanokakan. It is about Father and daughter switching minds and being each body for 7 days. It was hilarious! The girl, known as Koume has a crush on a Senpai called Kenta (as played by Shige. Hot dog I swear.) and when they switch bodies it's like father having to act as though she's being all happy that kenta senpai is talking to her or something. Or even, hugging Kenta senpai! Then father which has Koume's mind controlling her body would run down the hill in a very gay manner going "Eiyaaaaaaa". I laughed so hard that I was literally rolling on the bed when I watched the episodes. But later it wasn't as funny as before already and the reason why they managed to switch bodies is just plain weird which was further explained in the last episode. Okay, why did I watched this. Partly because of Shige, hehehee but actually I was browsing around Dailymotion and I saw the clip so I watched and I laughed like crap (Episode 2 I think, when Koume and Kenta senpai went on a date) It was hilarious! And besides, Shige had fauxhawk in the show. I like alot! :)

I've also taken an interest in Aragaki Yui, the main actress who played as Koume. She is so pretty and cute! I want to be like her too! Which means I need to lose weight like crazy! Japanese high school life is so much different from Singapore. It's not fun over here, we don't have to like give friendship bands to our crush just for goodluck. And we don't watch your crush playing any particular sport or try your best to like get to know them via friends or else stalking. Lol. Not that I particularly like the stalking part, but it's cute overall in the Japanese kind of way. AND SUCH CUTE DOCOMO HANDSPHONES. Flip phones are never as stylish as those you can find in Japan! With cute emoticons for you to use while typing emails! Not fair. And it looks so much cuter than IPhone4! I would rather have the flip phone than IPhone4 anytime. Flip phones are so much of love that it overpowers stupid slidephones. Not to mention that my stupid phone restarted 5 times in a row today when I was sending out sms. I need a new phone before this one spoils and my dad will kill me and he will have no phone to use once I change my phone.

Tomorrow I will work hard and also work even harder on Friday for the photoshoot! I actually feel so unaccomplished because I didn't do the gas mask which intended for the photoshoot. But I did not, and I think people are going to fight with me for the studio to take photos! Abit worried that I cannot fulfill what I spent the whole 3 weeks working out on the props. Very worried that it will go down to waste. Okok, I need to think of a photoshoot plan tomorrow along side with more machinery. Screw the Interim 2 submission next week. FML. I need some free time and slacking time even though I'm shamelessly doing it now so but I want to youtube and watch videos. I want to watch NEWS concerts, I want to see Shige being all hot and sexy while singing Kuchizuke wo to the screen~ I want to watch GLEE also! :( I need to hold on for another 3 -4 weeks and I'll be on holidays!!!

I cannot stop laughing at this when Joanne showed me just now in class and we did a spoofed on this one. We were missing the mustache or else it would be made of crack! Not uploading ours cause it's abit embarrassing. hahahahah!

Thats all, 言いたいだけ!

High school senpai Shigeaki, High school love. Ahh Shiawase~

2011-03-01T03:49:00.008+08:00

Hi, I have came to blog about my happiness here on Blogger because I am so lazy to type on Livejournal at the moment. Talk about lucky and lucky shots during concerts. I'm not really those superb photographer but I like taking photos just for the sake of taking, seems like this hobby of mine is not really that much of a use. Dang. Anyways, the photos are uploaded on Facebook and those which I uploaded had crappy editing skills because I was either too sleepy that my eyes aren't working properly. Anyways, working on the high resolution one since Three Angles want my pictures to show Raymond Lam's team. I am so so so happy, really!

Not going to blog about Raymond Lam's concert because I'm just as lazy that I don't like typing especially when I'm being all anxious on watching drama! This is bad and check out the time and yet I still want to watch drama. Tsk, tomorrow will be a sleepy day which I have also yet to work on my steampunk wings for my shoes, hat feathering and also my jacket iron on. Such a waste of time for P3. Sigh.

Today, I had such a ripe and nice picture to edit! Picture of Koyashige was up on Livejournal and I used the scans! But I still think that it should be of higher resolution, I am quite picky when it comes to making my own wallpaper. Anyways, I played with photoshop colouring again and I'm quite proud of it as well. Not bad for another done wallpaper. I want to submit a set of Koyashige wallpapers but I don't have much time to play with photoshop at the moment. Making do with some selective colours and also some light textures. I'm crazy over light textures as the moment so I'm mass spamming them whenever I can! They make the pictures all glowy! Sorry Joanne, I got the itchy urge to change my wallpaper already when I thought it would be Jinwoonie but I became a traitor today.

G'night people. Back to my drama for now, hoping to finish by this week, 7 episodes only!
And I wish tonight I will dream of Shige singing くちづけを to me! Heehee.

Rather than gathering words to speak, just use a kiss.

2011-02-25T04:39:00.007+08:00

In case you're wondering about the long hiatus. Haha, ok sorry. Was busy busy.
TGIF, I have never been so happy to type that 4 letter word especially now. Such a hard and suffering week with tonnes of submission at one go and I totally feel like dying. So I managed to pass this whole week without wanting to commit suicide because I realised that everyone is on the same boat and we are all in this together! I'm so not digging HSM now, but I like seeing many people online on msn rushing work. Sorry to sound like a sadist and be happy that no one could sleep because of work.

I like the feeling of able to sit by the school canteen and watch people pass by as we make fun of them somehow, looking either weird or something. Feels like aunties over at the coffeeshops shaking your legs with nothing better to do. But usually only uncles do that. The feeling of freedom and nothing to do is something which I longed pretty much for quite some time. And I didn't even watch GLEE for 3 weeks. Talk about being in the shithole of school work.

School aside, I need to update on some stuff in case you are wondering how I managed this whole entire month being a dead fish. I took up watching GLEE, stop hearing K-Pop for quite a long moment before I popped back into J-Pop. There is something really wrong with me that I'm actually reminiscing the past when I used to go crazy over J-Pop especially over w-inds. Then I had several brief moments of other J-Pop bands which I didn't really dive into as much as I did for J-Rock later on. Mostly those that I've touched are friends whom are crazy fans of them and decided to share their joy. Lol

Can Shige not be any hotter? :/
Funny isn't it that I changed my biased in newS like 3 times before I actually lastly liked Shige the most? First started with YamaPi, I think over Dragon Zakura and other stuff like Nobuta wo Produce then I moved my ass onto Tegoshi. But after awhile I don't know, doesn't seem like pretty boys that much then I laid my eyes on Shige. Hehehe. Okay, after they brief fandom moments of them before I head over for my J-Rock obsession. Now, I am back again wooh! Thanks to someone's new rekindered love interest in Pi, I have decided to snoop around on Taiyou no Namida again and thus this is resulting to massive newS spam - this time far worst off than last time. I'm crazy over Shige :/ I looped one video of him 5 times just because he said "くちづけを/Kuchizuke wo" in such a hot sexy matter than I couldn't stop looking at him! Then I eventually went to download the performance hahahahahaah! Shige has a hot sexy voice which I love to hear him sing, well certain lines :)

Okay, I admit I have this really weird fetish for guys in specs(or I called it megane) and also fauxhawk hairstyle, which I think hardly ever in my K-Pop obsession that has that kind of hairstyle. Maybe only for Minhyuk in LOVE and Jo Kwon in 친구의 고백. Seulong had before but I think it looks funny on him, makes him look so old! Oh yeah! Changmin had fauxhawk before too! But not very nice either. So far, the hottest male I ever seen with fauxhawk and can pull off megane with that hairstyle is Shige! Now to the sad comparison of guys whom I know personally, mostly and sad to say most of them have fringe hairstyle and I think in some perspective + feminine face sums up to quite a girly image look. Totally not manly. Ugh. The only person whom I can think of right now whom has flipped up fringe and megane glasses is Alex. Lol. Whose hairstyle didn't change for like 5 years? Okay, got abit. That time he kept it long and after that he went to cut so it looks so much better and more handsome (Y).

Back to Shige! Currently such an exciting topic to talk about as for now. I will be pasting the link to watch the performance of Shige singing "くちづけを/Kuchizuke wo" over here on blogger (please look at the youtube vid above!). No flipped up fringe in this perfomance, hardly see him in that hairstyle anymore! :( But I need to share my anxiety of this whole issue. I'm crazy at the moment. I also start shipping Koyashige which I think they are just made of crack especially their performances together! Youtube Koyashige to watch, not wasting blogger space when I got one more thing to talk about...

I took a short nap today in the afternoon after I got back home, and I had this horrendous dream. So creepy that I thought it was real! I dreamt of Massu! The last person I ever one to dream of from newS and why Massu???!!! Why not Shige?! I won't even mind! Because it was a crazy dream that I seduced Massu and he was my boyfriend? Like how in the world is that even happening?! The world will come to an end and Sondra will murder me and cut me into bits and pieces because it's Masuda Takahisa!!! Oh my god! Creepy dream ok! And I have to keep my relationship with him a secret? It's so wrong that I get the gitters typing it out as well. I might as well head to bed now, hopefully no continuation on this crazy dream. Ugh. Nights.

Everyone got shot in the head, and acted wonky.

2011-02-02T03:35:00.005+08:00

I'm soooooooooooooooo sleepy. And I got to wake up later at 9.30am.
Good morning people, the night goes on and people are turning in (more like turned in already)

I feel so inspired, but yet so lazy that I do not want to get any work started. I have holidays yes, thank you CNY but no thank you because I can't consult for my P3 and of the amount of work I'm carrying is actually quite heavy. Can't wait for this block of nightmare to be over. I wish everyone could just be as understanding to know that I am currently under the state of depression that I'm slitting my wrist and buried under a pile of homework all left undone. So please do not, ask me to do this and do that because I set aside what I need to do first and others are set aside and not touch them until when I have the time to actually get my ass down to do it. And I'm not really happy if you show attitude to me either when I am unable to do something which you requested. I don't like to entertain such "not understanding people", and please do not bitch about my non-responsive self to others whom have no utter interest to hear your whines. Like I said, I have schoolwork of P3, ComdA and also CDI project this month, so I kindly wish all of you (YES ALL) to stop asking me do things that are not school related. Other than that, I lied - I'm not under depression at all. It's suppose to shock everyone. Lol.

I was labeled as Missing in Action (MIA) because I'm so engrossed with the amount of school work I'm having and I left so much things untouched. Let's say that I did not even went on 2AM therapy everyday and no more youtube videos of Seulong with him jumping around half-naked singing to Beautiful Monster. I'm not a pervert ok, but Candy keep spamming me the links which I cannot seem to unsee. And also, I do not know how to say but ... life is just so mundane and quiet that I feel as though everyday has just became a routine. Everyone I see everyday, which is a part of a routine. I could get used to it, even though my butt's kind of itchy for pure entertainment to jump around and meet people whom I missed. I led a happy and yet uneventful life for the past few weeks (excluding my eye candies) and it's also spent in an non-angry way. I love quiet peaceful non-angry days when I don't have to listen or attend to shit. Haha, I'm not actually upset or angry which leads to my quiet self. It's just that I don't really have much to say to anyone right now. I think the workload has made my mood dampened to the state that I think talking is very much a waste of energy or hassle. Keeping silent is somehow engraved into the personality of mine, very soon I won't be a loud, jumpy and crazy person which you all know :)

Oh yes, this is something which I liked to share. I think it's just a piece of my imagination when it's playing me out when I was sleeping last night, thus waking up with a horrible migraine... I dreamt of Zhao Han last night! Seems rather strange which I would ever dream of my husband ... and I actually really got married to him. And I even went on honeymoon with him and had 2 children. My brain is going haywire, seriously. Maybe because I was talking to Esther about the world ending in 2012 and how much I didn't fulfill in life like getting married and having children! This is definitely not possible or done so by 2012, then I subconsciously thought of it when I was sleeping or something hence causing me to dream of marrying Zhao Han. My husband will flip if he knows about this. Hahahaha! Worst, I was so embarrassed about the dream that I wished that today I would not see him in school and I actually did. But I was on the phone so I purposely turn away while on the phone so that I do not have to face him. Veron actually waved at him, and I was like on the phone. Hahahahaha! I cannot face him! Feels so weird also. I hope not to have a continuous part 2 of this dream. Maybe this time, our kids grow up and got bad and good influenced and I would wake up from the shock that me and Zhao Han lived till the golden ages and our kids send us to holidays to travel around the world to see the 7 wonders or maybe perhaps me on the deathbed which I either die from old age or illness and Zhao Han would either be gone or still around (which means I'm leaving the cruel world first, sob)

I'm off to sleep now. Can't wait for breakfast tomorrow then it's back to working on proposal!

Sore eyes, they totally kick in.

2011-01-26T02:47:00.005+08:00

HAPPY 20th BIRTHDAY MY DEAREST HAYDEN CHRISTOPHER.
I love you to bits and pieces my dearest, and you have spent a total of 4 years with me. You will always be my first and yet most favourite doll amongst JUDAS.CLAN and you will be treasured more and more in years to come as I will take this year and opportunity to buy you new clothes and have more photoshoots for you (for portfolio purposes also). Wishing you good looks that last forever and also not to yellow in time to come! And for you to love Dahlia back dearly and not be a fussy pot when it comes to clothes k? Ringleader will love you always and always will! ♥

Today, I actually contemplated suicide. It has been running through my mind when I heard the news that our ICA layout spreads, all 5 were rejected and we need to redo them from scratch and hand up 8 new spreads by this friday alongside with the horrible last minute details for the submission on friday for Interaction Design. Totally I was in the state that I'm going crazy and I nearly wanted to jump off Aljunied MRT Station platform. Totally.... But little did I know that I was being tricked by Amirul and the rest of the ICA Project team that in fact that our layouts were accepted and only minor adjustments needed to made, I was so happy that thoughts of suicide just flew away. Totally .... what the hell just happened?

I skipped school today, not because that I want to but because my eyes really did swell up like some char siew bao, and I don't think make up or concealer can cover up the swelling. The last time I had sore eyes was in Hong Kong, but it wasn't so bad as of today and I could still wear contacts out. But today it was so painful even when I blink, so I decided that I should stay home and let my eyes rest. It's on medication already, so I think it should go off by tomorrow .. well hopefully. Cause I skipped on ICA meeting with the client and also group consultations. Me and Edward totally left Dawn alone in school today, I felt so bad. And besides, I feel as though my contribution to the group work is close to minimum. I have no idea most of the time what they are talking about and they can babbler on and on with ideas which I could never come up with. I totally suck at coming up with futuristic ideas because I know that I could not accept facts of having to pop a pill into my mouth and go around claiming that I had McDonald's Cheeseburger for lunch? That defeats the purpose of people savoring good food, bits and pieces of it. That's why future should not be taking away joys in life!

Eventful weekends have passed and I felt as though I do not want to face the next few weeks dying from schoolwork. I need to get out and exercise. Besides, I also want to save up money for some future plans on porfolio works and also time for me to actually get down and do it. I need alot of time, alot and alot of time. So much commitments which I cannot keep up but I do not want to give up just yet, things will work out .. somehow when I feel as though I can actually settle my problems one by one SLOWLY. But I love eventful weekends! Especially the one that recently just passed and cause me to have such a horrible sore eyes.

People claim it was because I saw too much of eye candies, therefore I had sore eyes. I doubt so because my mum said that it could be because I do not have enough of sleep. But truddat, I really see had an eyeful on Friday and of course, Hurhurhur Saturday! Will elaborate more on Saturday's eye candy. Actually not really eye candy lah, more of like see already - oh my gosh so handsome! Then go around shy shy and tell friends then shy shy. Hahahahaha! I had a photoshoot on Saturday as an invited one and I was threatened to cosplay or else I won't get to see Drefan. So I rushed out all my stuff within a week, including making the ear piercings so that I COULD JUST SEE DREFAN. Winter and Yukino invited me to the shoot just because I told them that when I saw Drefan in real life, I totally think he was good looking and I couldn't stop looking at him. They were so kind as to invite me to cosplay something which I read only a few pages of the manga and gave up because I could not understand what was going on and the chinese was killing my brain cells. So I based off the characters with only explanations from Yukino, my dearest Majo witch! The people keep giggling at me when I keep oggling/staring at LOL ........ because practically everyone knew about it. Except for him. LULZ. I didn't dare to ask for a camwhore picture because I was so shy and my whole face turned all red and my ears went very very hot and I was going hysterical when they were all pulling and dragging me to have a picture taken; some even wanted to help me take a picture with him. I was so gone case then. This is foremost the most embarassing thing ever with subsequently other events which happens and everyone just keeps wriggling eyebrows at me. Oh by the way, I got to take the group shot, and I sat next to him! 8DDDDD

In conclusion, Roy died as a happy fangirl. Oh yes, he knows my husband. And if my husband knew that I'm eye candy him, he will laugh and most probably tell him and I can go really dig a hole and hide my head in it already. WOOH.

/Played my part on keeping Yong accompanied and I even OT the time I'm suppose to head to bed. G'night people!

還有這個好友已經足夠

2011-01-21T02:25:00.004+08:00

講一千句也不夠
假使講了你聽到後或會走
放手放開所有彼此更自由
放手其實我絕非愛得不夠

期望你幸福甚麼都有也許愛很深厚然而我早看得透

Sometimes I wish there was someone whom I could just be close to, someone to lean on when I'm feeling down, tell my troubles to the person without being told off that I was annoying by doing so, give me a pat on the head whenever I feel discouraged, does not make me feel like I owe them favors for all the things they did for me. Is there really such a person that could NEVER been found? I feel envious again, really envious. How sinful :( I miss but I refused to admit but then again, vase once broken it takes time to heal. Even once pieced back together, there will always be cracks and forever will it have cracks on it and the more fragile it becomes. I need to stop being pessimistic, I need to start believing alittle in tarot cards, hopefully the advice given would be of very much useful.

I'm trying very hard, but sometimes I feel as though changing would never be the best as people are greedy to ask and expect more from you. I need to be myself again, I need to stop being under control spells that I will listen and obey like a tame animal. Why can't people just stop expecting so much from me when I tried so bloody hard to swallow so much emotional and temperal issues. I hope one day I would not blow my top again, seriously. And I do not want to tolerate people's attitude or nonsense towards me again.

Blow wind Blow

2011-01-15T03:07:00.006+08:00

Taken from TP Open house when me and Nur was just playing with the photobooth, DJ tweeted this picture and I snagged it!

I can't believe I just spent hours away trying to revamp the whole entire HTML for this blog layout. Fail designer student who is just too lazy to design her own blog. I is made of fail. But I did do some coding! Because I don't like the previous layout and the fonts were annoying the crap out of me so I changed. Giving up South Park time just for blogging, feels like I made a bad choice.

One week passed, how much have I actually understood and knew during these days. It is upsetting, really that sometimes I learn about things that are yet shocking but sad but I do not want people just to give up like that. The choices that everyone make now seem to be even more important as ever as it changes a person's life walking path. Everyone hopes that the decision they made, it would be the right one. How much effort and considerations before moving on one step. Life is creepy yet such a gamble.

I worked hard that I forgot alot of entertainment these few days, what is SLEEP within these days? What is working your butt off midnight and not come up with anything. Screw inspirations? How are we supposed to come up wit designs when we are so dead tired. I haven't been able to sleep properly this whole week thanks to CDI project and something to add on to my goodnight sleep - renovations. Why in the whole would they start hacking down 3 toilets, the kitchens and cabinets at 8am in the morning. Fuck. I want to sleep, it's just so rare to have classes at 12pm when I could just catch alittle more shut eye, just alittle! 5mins would do! But you just had to drill the damn floors and tiles out! Funny isn't it, that the renovations is actually 3 floors up. SOUND TRAVELS, SCREW THE PERSON WHO DISCOVERED THAT EQUATION LOLOL. I'm feeling all corny.

My luck has been down the pits lately and I blame it all on Karma. What in the world did I do to deserve such miserable grouping, miserable event for something to attend, miserable fact that my phone keeps shutting down on me, miserable workload of crapschool work, miserable seating places etc. What in the world is this? May I have the right to protest that I did not, repeat did not do anything bad to deserve such bad karma! All I did was to warn people about having bad karma in return and all arrows shoots back at me. Oh god, someone please teach me how to freaking avoid such badluck! I can't even escape that non-existent in peace when I have to freaking face IT for like a week on group project - fuck my life. Not that I'm still angry but I have no utter interest in talking neither looking at that particular human-like molecule particles floating somewhere somehow or whatsoever. Having to go attend something because you promised and you can't back out when you found how much "tofu" will be lost when you attend! I lose faith in guys like how often my dad buys a bunch of bananas home for high fiber diet! Let's all turn lesbian girls! Ok, I was just kidding. Karma, I pray for you to go away. I shall go on a vegetable diet if you promise to go away! All I want things to go better for me now please! :(

Let me talk more about guys since I was in the topic, and I was watching South Park when the episode was about an Elephant making Love to a Pig. Do you know how gross that episode was, then it ended the episode with Zoophilia (Don't know what is it? Google.) Anyhoo, back to the guys. I was going down the escalator last week at Cathay and I saw 2 really good looking guys taking the escalator the opposite direction. When I realised that both of them got their fingers entwined together and they were whispering to each other = Verse's harem or league of guys. How wasted can it get? Yet, we can always say God is fair. Goodlooking = you miss out something, this time your sexuality attraction. Lol. Not that I'm against gays, but seriously WHY SO WASTED. Just like Adam Lambert for example, another hot guy turned gay... And Triz told me that mostly buff guys are homosexual, this explains the 2 guys which I saw that day; quite buff - the both of them. Then I suddenly thought that Seulong onggie might be gay too since he's all buff and suddenly he might confess to Ok Taecyeon that he's got the hots for him!!! Let's blame it on the something something murphy's law something something global warming something something that things are turning out this way when buff men are gays and normal scrawny looking guys are normal. Shouldn't it be the other way round? Scrawny guys needs need strong buff men to protect them! Or else what? Their girlfriends protect them? Hahahahahahahha! Seriously joke.

New Year brings in new aspects!

2011-01-10T01:44:00.004+08:00

2010 New Year Resolution :

More money will roll into my pocket

Increase my GPA and do well in design even though I suck at it.

Mum and Dad to be healthy

~~To be strong, physically, mentally and emotionally~~

~~Stop treating people for granted~~

~~Stop making penglin in the tight spot all the time~~

Stop having so much cosplay plans that I can't seem to count how many
etc.

Based on last year's new year resolution which I have typed and recorded into my blogspot, I think I managed to fulfilled quite amount of things on the list, more than half actually. And I shall talk about what I have overcome during the past year. I have thought myself to be more stronger in all 3 ways, physically, mentally and emotionally. For the setbacks which I have got through last year, I learn a valuable lesson on not taking people for granted and also being able to control my temper etc. I have learn to stop thinking of things and put them behind me, unless they were yet again triggered somehow, and occasionally it happens which pisses me nonstop and it leads to me keep thinking that whether I made the right choice or not. My choices was once and once again always surfacing into my mind whether what have I done, was it right or was it wrong? I came to realised that I could also not put people into tight spots like Penglin for example, why should she be the one who has to tolerate my nonsense when it's that fucker the one pisses me off? This points back to taking people for granted. I guess it's a good that I learnt myself and managed to keep up with my resolution. I have managed to stop crying over small matters and also became stronger by able to be nonchalant and ignorant over certain things. Karma's a bitch uh, in my life it takes up a human form which totally can make my veins got POP. I need to step on karma, step and step all over again let it not get to me again. And this leads to my this year's new year resolution!

2011 New Year Resolution :

More money will roll into my pocket

Increase my GPA, work hard on portfolio, go for OSIP.

Mum and Dad to be healthy

Step on karma till it kneels down and beg for forgiveness.

Make people not to treat me for granted.

Be more influencial.

To be a superwoman, able to withstand all setbacks no matter what.

It's not really something not achievable. I took the step to fight back the karma already, the step which everyone told me to do. I did it, I really did and not hard feelings doing so, because I think it's not really worth to care over such matters which upsets me. What upsets me, shall not be cared by or even talked to by me. Unsee, Unhear, and Unspeak. Since I knew that I am much more stronger than last year, I'm sure that Life would get even better when you choose to block out things that only makes your blood pressure increase. Seriously, I am so proud pf myself for being able to feel at least not angry anymore in the short time span of 30mins. Good job roy, good job.

Kingsley ah, can you come up with a equation to ward off all evil karma away?

直到你不找我

2011-01-07T02:23:00.002+08:00

真係好開心！我自己好鍾意這個角色，因為Kingsley這角色設計是女性的dream man，是王子的感覺，而楊怡演的犀利妹則是灰姑娘，整個故事發生如童話一樣。劇集中亦創造了很多經典場面，如與犀利妹在碼頭講計數的那一場，直到今天大家仍然談論『苯氨基丙酸』。 - 林峯's TVB blog

Yes, I can read what it says (i can read Traditional Chinese better than Simplified ones) I have to agree with the first few sentence which he mentioned. Kingsley is really everyone's dream man. Hahaha! Who doesn't want to be Cinderella?! He's the perfect kind of guy everyone wants ok, since I also like his fashion sense in this drama. Awesome, anyhoo I finished this drama already!

Brb, I will blog another time when I feel more at ease because I'm fuming over the fact that I need to be in school at 10am when my Open House duty starts at 2pm. FML

I wants, very much desu

2010-12-28T04:08:00.004+08:00

I ALSO WANT!

Midnight walk hand-in-hand on top of hill where likes the most beautiful scenery of HK with a hot guy such as Lam Fung.
Envious envious!
Watching dramas sure make you envy and imagine such wonderful things, sigh.

MERRY CHRISTMAS WITH RANTS.

2010-12-25T16:56:00.002+08:00

first of all,
merry christmas everyone, and i start of today's post with a rant. heh heh.

My mum keep telling why am I always having to do things which are not even mine and help others when I have no time for even myself. Because I want things to go my way so I've gotten to help out but then again, she told me whether the people would even appreciate your help. Yes, that pondered in my mind for quite sometime but I want people to actually go my way, so I have to work my butt off even though that sacrifice sleeping time or whatsoever. But obviously I would definitely be happy if the person actually appreciate my hard work and thank me eventually I guess it's called "being paid off" for all the hard work, which makes both party somehow happy.

Then again, how about those people that only come to you when they need help? After that they just outcast you, forget about you and don't care about your existence anymore until they suddenly realised that someone is actually missing or maybe suddenly thought that they needed help from that person again. Like woooooh, seriously. Is it nice to always have to secretly see that you being somehow outcasted for god knows why, maybe it's just you are eccentric and perhaps not "cool" enough to be in their dictionary. Always the one who has to fill up the spot when it's not complete, and once it's complete not even being asked to even join though the cup is at full brim when there are chances for overflowing. Then again, maybe perhaps I have been so busy or caught up with certain things that I couldn't find time to actually to go bonding sessions, but you know what, I still think the main reason is just that I'm not "cool" enough to be counted as one of them, and only been treated like some maid dog. That's sometimes how I felt towards situations like these. Asking for help from them back is also something else, I can always ask back in favour to help me out in something but I don't intend to do so because I think it's not really nice and perhaps it's just the awkwardness of suddenly asking for help.

Noobshit, yes I'm angry and I decided that I shall not be a pushover anymore.

God'am stupid

2010-12-06T05:06:00.006+08:00

G'Morning people.
I need to be awake in 3 hours time and I'm here typing this.
Anyhoo, short update on the long weekend that just passed before I get down and type a full length one for memories sake - for the times which I got happy and for the times which my candy was stolen from me and also being trampled all over like a runway track.

I woke up today morning feeling as those whatever I did from thursday to saturday night was just plain stupid. I never thought how stupid it was until today when my mind was clouded with happiness, sadness and bad luck. Nevertheless, I didn't care and rolled out of bed around 4pm or so with my whole body aching like no one's business. What a weekend.

To those who think I am hallucinating, but no. I swear someone sign damn big for me (damn obvious in the pic above) because I told him, he was my biased when the MC asked and also in front of him. God knows whether he understood or not, but thank you for your huge signature affection! :)

Whilst,
Enjoy this while I get my butt on EOY and school work because I loved how someone showed so much fanservice to the camera in the beginning that I downloaded the video too, just for the goodness of it.

/btw, that someone is none other than Im Seulong / Ajibem Ong Seulongongong. ♥♥

TROUBLE TROUBLE TROUBLE. THEN YOU SHOOT SHOOT SHOOT FALLING LADY, THEN HOOT HOOT HOOT (ﾉಥ益ಥ）ﾉ

2010-11-29T03:33:00.004+08:00

Mel's favourite cosplay outfit! I reckoned this is the second best one so far because I definitely would love frills and more frills. And I love my Nouhime's costume the best because I spent so much effort on it by painting so much of the patterns on it that I grew to love it! I will cosplay Nouhime once again! Soonish I hope, trying to get the other SW girls to join the fun!

Frankly speaking, I am in totaly deep shit for EOY because I am afraid that I might not be able to finish my costume. Maybe not so bad because this is the second time I'm actually drafting the full costume out by scratch (unlike queen's because I did the corset only) with Kagami as the first ever costume I entirely sew it myself with help from mum of course. My mum borrowed a sewing machine which is so much better than the one I'm having because now it can sew backwards! So I do not have to manually turn the cloth backwards to sew. And I have to admit that I wanted to cry that the pricey amount I paid to buy all the jewels for my P-chan, from Green, blue to red jems of all different types of shapes and sizes. And another sad part of the cloth for my chest area ... $15 per Metre. Holy mother, Jesus Christ. This clearly puts me in a completely cut off diet so that I can keep my money in my wallet at least having the most $2 in it. Help! After EOY, will be back to hibernating while I resurrect my financial losses. Will be working hard the next few days while I get stuff done and also enjoy my 2AM goodness as much as I can because this is a really rare chance that I can even take picture with my 2AM boys. WOOOHH /o/

HAHAHAHA. Ok, seriously I am not that angry in the first place. I just being sarcastic in my previous post because it totally brings out a total bimbo or bitch of me which I could imagine myself flipping my hair and saying those words. It really can be proven that I really do NOT have anger management problem, because I really don't see myself getting angry with anyone else except for DPEC over matters. Even though I just get alittle upset that some people just make use of me to do things but I don't really get THAT angry and I don't fucking PMS. Mel said I where got Anger Management problem! And I can vouch that I never actually scream or shouted at any other friend before or let alone now, shouting at anyone else because I learnt that silent is really very much the answer for everything. So DPEC can bitch to everyone else about me having anger management problems and those who believe him are those whom always see me getting angry with him. Have you ever seen me angry with anything else other than him before? N/N? But I do not actually mean that I'm an all saint upon not being angry with anybody, because I do however or eventually get angry prolongly if it's being wronged to for countless times. Perhaps if you're wondering that I'm actually shielding myself and saying that I was totally not in the wrong, well no. Actually it's also kind of my fault somehow, in a way that I had miscommunication with him - like always (-_-)

Besides I'm not dwelling that much into it also and I didn't really got all moody these past few days unlike the time when we fought, huge improvement that I can actually get on with life and also enjoy Ah Dai's birthday to the fullest and the happiest! Very good Roy! I have came to forgive myself for being absolutely stupid in certain things and put unhappy things aside when other things make you extremely happier! Ahahahahhahaa, 我果然有一点点变成女人当自强了!

Can't wait till Thursday! Till then I will blog again!

TO THE PRINCE OF ALL KINGS AND QUEENS AND UNDER EARTHLINGS ALL BURRIED UNDER YOU MAJESTIC SELF. HOHOHOHOHO.

2010-11-27T01:05:00.005+08:00

YEAH, SEE THAT PERSON THERE? THAT THE ECCENTRIC BITCH WHO GETS PARANOID OVER EVERY LITTLE THINGS. YEAH I AM THAT FUCKING BITCH, HAPPY? I CAN GO HOME NOW AND SUCK MY THUMB AND SULK AT THE FACT OF WHAT I HAVE BECOME AND STOMP ON ANTS WHILE THEY PARTY ON MY TABLE TO VENT MY ANGER.

WOOOH, I HAVE FUCKING ANGER MANAGEMENT PROBLEM TOO. EVERYONE CLAIMS SO TOO BECAUSE I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA HOW TO CONTROL IT. I AM VERY VERY ANGSTY AND I LOVE PISSING PEOPLE OFF. I LIKE PEOPLE TO TREAT ME BADLY LIKE MAKING FUN OF ME SAYING THAT I AM FAT AND NOT PRETTY, GOT PIG NOSE OR WHATSOEVER BECAUSE TO ME IT'S LIKE FUCKING PLEASING TO MY EARS SO PLEASE GO AHEAD AND CARRY ON TELLING ME SUCH THINGS BECAUSE I WOULD SO TOTALLY LOVE TO HEAR THEM. I AM SUCH AN ATTENTION WHORE THAT I CAN WHORE MYSELF TO ANY OTHER PEOPLE JUST TO FULLY GET THEIR ATTENTION SO PLEASE PITY ME AND JUST JUST GIVE ME THAT ATTENTION OK? BECAUSE I AM SOOOOOO PARANOID THAT I THINK YOU, THE ONE READING IS HAVING ISSUES WITH ME SO PLEASE DON'T THINK OF ME THIS WAY K? WHAT SHOULD I DO SO THAT I CAN CONTINUE TO BOOTLICK YOUR BEAUTIFUL SMELLING SHOES? DON'T HAVE ISSUES WITH ME LEH. /SADFACE.

AND ALSO I LOVE PEOPLE WHO COME TO ME WHEN THEY FEEL LIKE THEY HAVE ALL THE FUN AND FEEL BORED WITH THE OTHER WORLD AND I WILL WELCOME BACK WITH OPEN ARMS AND TRY MY BEST TO ENTERTAIN THEM. BECAUSE THAT IS MY FORTE RIGHT? I AM SUCH A JOKER THAN I CAN TOTALLY JUST MAKE PEOPLE ENJOY MY COMPANIONSHIP BECAUSE I MYSELF IS THE JOKE OF THE SEASON, NO JOKE OF THE ENTIRE CENTURY. OH YES, ONCE YOU ARE BORED WITH THE JOKE OF THE CENTURY - ME FEEL FREE TO GO AND FIND OTHER FRIENDS TO ENTERTAIN YOU BECAUSE THE AMOUNT OF ENTERTAIN I GIVE WAS NEVER ENOUGH AND I WAS NEVER JUST GOOD ENOUGH BECAUSE IT MAKES ME FEEL SO INFERIOR TO EVERYONE THAT I CANNOT KEEP A PERSON'S ATTENTION SPAN LONG ENOUGH. AND ALSO GUESS WHAT? I LIKE TO FEEL UPSET ON HOW INFERIOR I AM TO PEOPLE THAT I WANT TO IMPROVE MYSELF IN SO MUCH WAYS THAT I CAN BE A BETTER PERSON SOMEHOW, SOMETHING OF MORE WORTH. BUT I CANNOT LEH, THEN HOW? WHAT YOU WANT ME TO DO? I DID MY BEST ALREADY, BUT IT IS NOT WORKING. SO HOW? /SADFACE AND SOMEONE SAY I SECRETLY LIKE WANT THAT PERSON ALL TO MYSELF LEH, BUT NO. I THINK NOT. HOW CAN YOU SAY ME LIKE THAT? YOU THINK I ALWAYS WANT YOU TO MYSELF MEH? EVEN IF I WANT YOU ALSO I DON'T WANT YOU TO TREAT ME LIKE THAT ORHZXZXZXZXZ THEN HOW COME YOU CAN ONLY CONTROL ME LIKE A MARIONETTE BUT I CANNOT CONTROL YOU AS WELL? WRY LIKE THAT ONE? REALLY NOT FAIR HOR, BUT THEN HOW? COME COME, I CUT THE STRINGS THAT CONNECTS ME AND YOU CAN?

I AM CRAZY THAT I LOVE FLARING UP AT PEOPLE FOR UNKNOWN REASONS BECAUSE I AM JUST THAT CRAZY AHAHAHAHAHA, SO NOW THAT YOU KNOW I AM THAT CRAZY SO DO NOT LIKE COME NEAR ME BECAUSE I COULD JUST FUCKING BITE YOUR HEAD OFF. OH NO, DID I HURT YOUR FEELINGS BECAUSE IF I DID, I AM SOOOOOO SORRRYYYYYYY. BECAUSE FOR I AM LIKE THAT AND FOR THE PERSON WHO CHANGED ME INTO SUCH AN PARANOID LITTLE BITCH, I APOLOGIZE TO YOU /SADFACE.

I WORKED HARD TO CHANGE MY BLOODY TEMPER OF MINE OK, THAT I LET ALONE GET ANGRY I JUST KEEP QUIET AND I DO NOT TALK EXCEPT THAT MAYBE PERHAPS MY FACE TURN SO BLACK THAT IT'S EVEN DARKER THAN #000000 THEN SORRY. BECAUSE IF I WERE TO MAKE NOISE OR WHINE, SOMEONE WOULD TOTALLY JUST COMPLAIN THAT I DID NOT CHANGE AND I AM THAT EASILY LOSE TEMPER TYPE OF PERSON. SO I JUST KEEP QUIET AND PROBABLY JUST TEAR A PIECE OF TISSUE TO VENT MY ANGER FOR A MOMENT THEN I AM OK. I WORKED HARD TO MY ANGER MANAGEMENT ISSUES AND I AM SUCH A PARANOID BITCH THAT I STILL THINK THAT EVERYONE OF YOU EVERYONE WHO READS THIS BLOG THINKS THAT I AM SUFFER FROM ANGER MANAGEMENT. SO YEAH AND BY TYPING THIS POST CLEARLY SHOWS HOW I AM VENT MY ANGER BUT NO BECAUSE I LIKE TYPING IN CAPS AND I WANT EVERYONE TO KNOW THAT I CALLED THAT ECCENTRIC PARANOID BITCH SO THAT YOU ALL CAN STAND AWAY FROM MY PATH JUST IN CASE I HURT YOU OR SCOLD YOU /O/O/O/O/O/O/O/O/ \O\O\O\O\O\O\O\O\O\O\O\

BECAUSE I AM JUST LIKE THAT.

SIGNING OFF,
THAT ECCENTRIC PARANOID BITCH

WHICH OR WHOM'S BLOGPOST IS DEDICATED TO THE KING WHO THINKS THAT HE IS REALLY THE KING OF ALL KINGS. NO MORE LIKE PRINCE. YEAH I SALUTE YOU LIKE SERIOUSLY. /HAPPYFACE.

Eat plastic surgery

2010-11-26T02:05:00.006+08:00

I'm finally going to see my 2AM boys live next week and also gotten a chance to also get their autograph and talk to them personally. I'm practically in heaven!!!!! I was so afraid of not being able to get the gold tickets because my luck is quite down lately, but I was lucky! (even though I googled up some horoscope sites to see whether I'm lucky today or not) SO EXCITED STOP. I can't wait for Thursday seriously!

But I have to rush down from school to IMM right after class. So far, it's like traveling from one end to the other and I have to wait for hours before I could meet my AM boiiizzzzzz because the fansign only starts at 7.30pm!! Then I get to see them again on Saturday for the MNET Ultimate! Heehee.

Nothing can explain my mood now because of the whole entire fansign thing! It made my day even though I was pretty much du lan just now, actually more like since 4 days back.

DIDNOTREALISED #1 - I don't know how a person's attitude towards a person can totally change in one whole night, it's like at night that person is a totally different person from the person in the afternoon or morning? I feel as though I can be totally ignored from the total of timespan from morning all the way to the night then suddenly I have magically appear again in the person's dictionary to suddenly "oh this person, I suddenly remember." What the shit? Is this some kind of joke or what? And despite being totally in front of the person the whole day, it's just plain stupid. Yes, I feel stupid because I do make an effort to actually talk or whatsoever, then suddenly it's attention got diverted away then it's like my being was alpha down to 0%. So I don't really care after being "attention-snatched" because I can always find someone else to talk to, it's not like there is only one person left in the world. Pathetic.

I totally just wasted time being angry when I get pretty upset when people always tend to always get their ways practically by either persuasion or else forcing or just plainly getting mind manipulated. And if nothing floats their boat, they tell you "Oh, I don't think you treating me nice." Bullshit. And anyhoo you think I am a very much of a nuisance, I'll tell you there's always a catalyst who makes things happen, so yeah. I reckoned I would be a much lesser angsty person and more of a happier go lucky kind without the catalyst, I swear. It's making people's impression of me as a crazy eccentric bitch who likes to get angry all the time because I'm always being upset over things that the catalyst always say or do.

On the side note, I'm not angry anymore because I got indulgence of 2AM therapy, and I feel so much at ease now and plus the fact that I got the golden ticket. And the thought that I shouldn't stay angry and don't give a rats fart about it. Because for some reasons I think me being angry is just another person's joy!

DIDNOTREALISED #2 - I didn't know that 2AM got a Music Video for "Confession of a Friend", thinking that I watched every music video that ever got produced but I missed this out! I went to saw the translations of the lyrics, it's so touching! I still prefer Ballad more than Pop, that's why I prefer 2AM than 2PM and I love their voices so much. Saying them as gays is definitely not tolerable! :<
edited: I just previewed the post on my blog and the thumbnail of the video has kwon's really unglam singing shot with him being all emotionally attached to the song. ahahahahahha!

You hold my hand and tell me you only have me
Keeping me as a friend,
you say it's a blessing
Whenever you say let's never change,
I had to push my feelings down

It might be best if I protect you,
not knowing if it will be better

I kept hearing it but I kept cool
I was too scared to lose you, but...

Baby (Baby) Come to me now (Come to me)
And be my lady (lady)
I've watched you for too long
I stood there with no words,
hiding my pitiful heart (No)

As a friend (Your friend), to remain as friends (I know),
I had to push the confessions down my throat (The overflowing words)

That confession (confession) I had to hold it in (I couldn't say it)
But now I'll confess to you,
I love you...

DIDNOTREALISED #3 - MCR released another album on Monday and I was indulging on "The Ghost of You" because I was learning to play that song. So I actually went to watch the "NA NA NA" music video which I dreaded since I saw the concept of the video. I miss their funeral boys look, this is too much of retro and not much of how MCR should look like. But I didn't realised how addicted I was to NA NA NA that I keep singing and humming it in school or even at home.At least in school I got Alim to hum the song with me :D Good song, please do check it out!

我不想做小女人呢！ (PART 2)

2010-11-02T03:32:00.003+08:00

I gotten 4 little new girls which my mother brought back from China. She wanted to use them for her 3D cards but I stole all of them away and keep them for my own selfish-self! I don't think she bear to use it as well, I mean it's so adorable! I've actually taken photos of them and I didn't upload on FB yet because I don't know what to name them! I've got 4 and I'm only posting one picture now for sneaks, so please help out with their names!

Noob is n00b, Roy is n00b.
Firstly, I keep contemplating about how much can I actually say myself as "女人当自强" because I seem to failing so much in doing so and it proves me on Saturday and also today. Firstly, men have to protect me from being pushed away in the club because it was super crowded and many people were crossing/passing. Multiple dudes, not to mentioned that I cannot see their faces have to like put their hands around my waist to protect me from being like "washed" away in the storm of human beings dancing and grinding each other like nobody's business. Pfft. One guy even ruffled my hair and whispered into my ears to "take care" because he was leaving. Oh my god.. I can't even protect myself, how stupid is that. Okay, actually I did, I managed to saved my poor chest from being violated by actually jumped/freaked out whenever someone comes close to me and I do not want guys whom I don't know to be grinding me from the back when I can fucking feel as though their penis are erected and also trying to put their hands around my waist. (especially if you are not as hot as Song Joongki) Gross to the max that I cannot comprehend how much I hate to recall the feeling! Lesson learnt, cannot go to club when it's having an event.

Moving on.

Today I made those really bad mistakes and my laziness was overwhelming that I could not drag myself out of bed. I miscalculated the time and I thought I would be able to make it to Aunty Lilian's before school starts at 3pm but I was so wrong and I ended up at Serangoon at 2pm sharp and I was terribly late. So I decided to head to school first and I called Duck Prince Edward Chi(DPEC) to teach me to get to school from SengKang. So ... funny thing is that I got lost at SengKang MRT station because half the time I don't know where I was and the place was like "ulu" so I sat around until DPEC came to save my poor lost ass from SK Station. Fail #01. I exited the wrong side of the station which ended up having to walk under the sun. Fail #02. Okay, nothing else after that when I passed by really nice scenery over the TPE which I first saw in my whole entire life time in Singapore. I was fidgeting like a small kid in the bus and DPEC had to ignore my existence. When I reached school, I was like major cui or what because DPEC was saying that I looked like I wanted to die just by carrying the bag of cloth and he had to help me carry (before that he was carrying my laptop for me) ..... I think you know what I'm trying to say here don't you? Roy cannot even manage to carry a plastic bag full of cloth and also her laptop! Fail #03. After class I had to rely on DPEC again to make a trip back to SengKang then back to Serangoon again. DPEC offered to help but I keep thinking about how fail it was to make GUYS hold my stuff for me like I was some stupid damsel in distress showing off signs like "Oh~ This is so heavy, could you kindly help me carry this? *bats eyelashes and shows puppy eyes*" .... Eww. No. Come'on 女人当自强 ok! I know FQ told me that sometimes we just have to act like 小女人 so that guys will feel abit more useful and able to protect the girl but I simply cannot overlook myself doing that! No idea why as well. Okay, then I rejected DPEC helping me to carry and I struggled like shit, literally like shit for more than 2 hours. When I wanted to tie my hair and asked DPEC to help me at least hold my laptop and HE SAID NO BECAUSE I REJECTED HIM AND HE SAY ONCE REJECTED NO MORE HELP. DPEC you n00b hahahahahahahaha! I managed anyways so I was .. strong!

That's all that I want to type regarding PART 2 of this chronicle and Chompchomp's lala was sold out when we got there and I was like fml as I was looking forward to eating that. Oh and, Stingrays fly, yeah when I throw them at DPEC! Hahaha! No better than me running away from jumping prawns. Some people just act smart when they are initially very very dumb :D

Signing off with Song Joongki and Choi Minho! Cute boys with baby faces, I likes! My taste in guys have recently changed to baby faced uh, no idea why either. Maybe because Joongki just have the x-factor of making people melt when he winks or smile!♥

Look, just look at that look

2010-10-30T17:28:00.003+08:00

Actually I got lots of things to blog about,it's just that I'm very lazy all the time.
Forget it, I'll just upload a picture then just leave my blog to rot until I feel like blogging again.

I wished that school never started because I never gottened the mood to actually start on school work or just anything else that needs me to put my attention to it just because I got a due date to meet. I want to lie down on my bed watch gossip girls and SKK scandal like some fat digusting rilakkuma trying to act kewl.

Korean stuff is infectious, I should stay away from them for a moment because Joongki and SHINee is driving me extremely nuts. Everyone shut up, shut up! Don't want to hearrrrrrrrrr /imitates Key

I've never been more pleased with 2AM's comeback, please win SNSD's Hoot forevaaaa so that I do not have to hear people brag about how good SNSD is. Bleh

No one wants to entertain me

2010-10-16T04:29:00.004+08:00

Nobody wants to entertain me when they got IPhone4 with free internet and Itunes accounts to download stupid apps to play! I entertained myself by camwhoring!

Keke.
I simply would want to apologized for yesterday because I think I was showing the wrong attitude. I didn't mean to show such an awful "black" face to those at the barage. I just wanted to escape and be alone since I couldn't understand what everyone else was talking about and I felt major awkward for a moment. I keep running away from such things. Ugh. Anyways, I found many beautiful places while I explored around and it was definitely worthwhile to head back to those places again during the night time when all was pitch black and how the lights lit up the whole entire place.

Went down to explore at night with Alim and Amirul while the rest were doing I don't know what upstairs, playing games I think. We actually sat down at restricted area when we knew we couldn't enter. But shucks, I was wearing stockings and I couldn't dip my feet into the cool water like Alim did. Amirul really looks like some platypus while he capture amazing beautiful shots from there and I too wished that I got my camera! And nearly gotten to jail thanks to the sos spotlight me and Amirul played on our phone. The peeps actually spotted us and called us out with a torchlight. For a second there we thought that we were going to jail and our parents have to bail us out hahahaha!

No sleep + Baking + Whole day at Barage + Late Night movie = another P2 combo killer.

Waited for 2 hours to pass so that we could watch our night movie was killer and we couldn't watch Piranha cause my friend was the ticket seller and she knew I was not 21 yet. Omg lol

蓮，突然浸在深红色。。。

2010-10-08T04:05:00.005+08:00

如果在别的角度来看，我觉得Takumi应该爱回Reira。Reira从很小的时候已经喜欢Takumi了，可是Takumi之对Reira当作妹妹来看而已。如果Takumi可以把这个想法放下，很多事情不会发生。Nana不会和Takumi在一起，Nana也可以和Nobu开兴的过日子。

可是看来Future！Takumi好像变了，好像想通了。可是，我真的很想哭，我不敢读下去。。 Ren会死，在Nana生日的一天前！！ “What will happen between the two people of supposedly unshakable faith？！” 不想读下去！我真的很怕我会哭：（ Nana是个很坚强的女人，可是Ren一死，她会这么样呢？Nana 给她的第一生的小孩叫作Ren, 不是应为in memorial吗？Takumi和Reira的关系也是令我一点伤心读了他们的过去后。

读到这个脚步，我觉得我给错了roles给我的世界上的每一个人在这个故事里。很幼稚我知道，因为我觉得很多人我认识的在这个NANA故事的人物非常的相同所以必不得已的这样做T————T

Takumi's still a jerk but I still like him so! And sorry for having so much chinese translated post, if you don't understand you can google translate them. Hope my chinese is alright and not too difficult for the google translator to decipher 哈哈。

我不想做小女人呢！

2010-10-04T00:31:00.004+08:00

I thought I was not ...

1) Useless
2) A damsel in distress.

I had to cycle, then I realised that my bicycle tires were flat. Stupid me thought I could still cycle despite the flat and nearly died halfway while cycling out to MOBILE. Ok, so I ended up walking and I was so exhausted because of the stupid cycling with gravity or whatsoever and I was walking all so lopsided. This resulted to several bruises on leg because the pedal keeps hitting my calf and it's like painnnnnnnnn :( Took me around 5 songs to reach outside (counting time via songs, if each songs were an average of 3mins)

When I FINALLY got to MOBILE, some guy was pumping air into his car and his kids were playing around. I park the bicycle and waited for the guy to finish pumping his car tires. I don't know what, I think it's my face or something I look arrogant/sick/annoyed/impatient? Idk? He had to tell me that he almost done. I look that impatient meh?! LOL. The he asked me what pressure I wanted to pump of bike tires, the thought my tires exploding at my face was freaky enough. He thought I was not local, hahha! He said Taiwan or Japan, like LOL. I THINK I GOT CHEENA FACE OK, WHY NEVER SAY FROM CHINA? 8d So I called my dad who was said that I should pump 50% pressure and I told the guy that he could leave because I was delaying his time. So he left and another car came. I felt so embarrassed that I was like struggling to pump air into the tires and my tires aren't getting inflated?! I was like some damsel in distress that the man who just parked in also had to help me pump air into my bike tires (-___-) then the man who works at MOBILE had to help me look after my bike while I head in to buy a bottle of lemon tea.

This reckoned embarrassing. 这种小事也不能做，我真没用啊！I thought I was a woman who does not need to rely on GUYS for such stupid small little things and yet today ...

你以为。

2010-10-02T03:17:00.003+08:00

从joanne学来的。

这几天我在想，
我真的不知道这么样做，那些use to帮我的朋友都不想帮我了。
因为他们也受够我的nonsense。我想的很累，真的很累。

我问自己，为设么你还continue要做我的朋友呢？是不是我是个好朋友所以你要收留？
哪，如果我是你的好朋友，为设么你会这样对我？？你让我真的很disappointed
你是第一个人说我很clingy，可是我不觉得呢，因为我不是第一打电话给你或是其它的小事情，那个人是你喔！how dare you指着我！

我很讨厌social butterfly，他们很不可靠。对朋友飞来飞去。你可以说我很anal，因为我觉得好朋友不应该是这种人。你以为很多朋友很好啊? 好luh, 我不想要朋友舒适会离开我just because他对这个group失去了juicy gossips and find us boring, then飘到other group of朋友去听even more juicy gossips.

有时候，我觉得在气你很累，可是如果我那么轻易的forgive你，我做朋友的，不是会很坏？因为怀的，想要你change for the better。不要你以错在错。你真的不明白。我哭着对你说也没用，因为你会看到我的soft side，你也会觉得你很big shot应为我为你而哭。你去死吧！Little damsels才会这样做。我才不是呢！我不会学做little damsels应为那不是我的character。可是有时候我也是个woman吗，我们活在世界上不是拿来欺负的，我们是拿来疼的。T——T can you just fucking understand I have woman feelings as well, I'm not like you fucking males who can fucking withstand fucking insults or whatsoever.

你看来你真的要放弃了，如果你放弃的话，我们再也不是朋友了。you can withstand all my eye flying daggers, my arrogant bastard face whenever I see you. 你可以live with it？可是，我不回back down so,不要想我会轻易“开门”给你。你要努力的show我，你是真心的要和我在做朋友，也有看到你有改变。

你让我失望真的太多次了，我没有trust和hope在你身上了。

I AM NOT, A PSYCHOTIC WOMAN.

2010-09-30T02:34:00.006+08:00

How can all of you think of me this wayyyyyyyyyyyy, I won't ever tie my bf up and force him to marry me. Feed him while he's tied up and wait till it's time when I slowly sew out our wedding outfit. I swear I will not do something like this ok! This is so not meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

LOOK AT THIS. JASMINE SHOWED ME AND THE GIRL IS SUPPOSED TO ME BECAUSE SHE THINKS THAT I AM THAT INSANE TO DO THINGS LIKE THESE. THIS IS CRAZY, I'M NOT CRAZY!

Oh but hey, the song's nice! And Lee Joon is freaking good looking here ohemmgeee! I would have rathered that he doesn't smile, because I saw other videos of him and he was smiling, it just took away all his suaveness (-_-)

I accidentally sync in one of the old Visual Kei MV into my IPod, which I had no idea when I actually did that. So I actually had a few minutes of reminiscing the old days when I heard and watch the MV (please watch the video above) while on the way to Tampines. I was like, I miss such ballad music and to think that I was so afraid of this band last time just because of their looks. Compared to Gazette and Alice Nine, they seemed to be overdressed? And their makeup was also rather over dramatic. But they make such beautiful music! Especially the guitar solos of both uhh, Jun and the other guy. Sorry I cannot remember, actually I only know Kisaki and Jun HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA! I suddenly miss Jrock. Oh and uh, Phantasmagoria broke up anyways O_Q

I had Manpuku for dinner today and I saw Donnie Yen; Joanne's handsome movie today! Joanne I help you photoshop your face onto ShuQi's face ok? Since you say you look like her and also it's very sad that she DIED. LOL. Don't cry, you can always be with your handsome in other happier movies. HAHA!

BBRI- BOBOBO- BOBBA- A

2010-09-29T02:59:00.004+08:00

HAHAHA ok. P2 was over last Thursday and there was actually 2 more post on this blog but I chickened out the last minute so I moved it to Livejournal F-Lock. So yeah, I won't be chickening out on this blogspot so don't worry.

LOL, sorry Esther. I used this pic because the other one I looked so fat in it! Pepper-sama, wry you so cute?! AND AND AND why can't I have a proper decent picture with Yong. That picture just had to be blur!! Like what the caption said! P2, that depressing block is over and I'm finally on holidays. Wooh! And I got some stuff I want to post up.

I was digging around my desktop for things to delete then I stumbled upon pictures which I think some of them actually never got uploaded! I feel cheeky so I added some stuff onto them! It's like Photoshop neoprint ya'know! It's quite fun to play except that I need to use a tablet to draw some stuff. I was snickering like mad when I did them. To my friends who are featured here (Pengs, Esther, Joanne, Veron, Stupid Chi, Shipeng, Alim, Yong, Amirul), I will apologize beforehand and no offense k? I love you all deep deep! 8D

Okay lah, I'm not actually very keen of showing how I looked like last time. My complexion is was so bad that I got pimple partying on my face. Hmm, at least they are gone by now and I look like a doofus last time. I think everyone looked different since then and all these pictures were ALL taken last year. I have so many pictures of me and Chi in my folder that I found it rather disgusting looking at it (-_-) and the 2nd picture of me and him should be the other way round. LOL! And thank god he has no more braces now, because it's like damn distracting at every picture I had. AND I did not have a photo of him without his braces, ohhhhokayyyyyyy. I wanted to draw jester hats for Amirul and Yong but it turned out bad and I don't know what colour scheme so I draw curly red clown hair (ie. Ronal Mcdonalds)

Please don't kill me.

HAHAHAHAHA. I'M TWO-TIMING.

2010-09-20T01:43:00.005+08:00

p/s If anyone happened to actually saw the latest post which I typed, I'm sorry because I think I was pretty harsh on certain things and I guess it's time to withdraw it back. So I actually deleted it away. HAHAHA.

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Whuddahell. AHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHA!
I'm sorry. I'm being very delusional here, and pardon my many of many typos.
Her DP is Kwon and my DP is Seulong. Now, I'm not the only one who's being unfaithful here. Still dare to say me?!
/runs into a meadows of daisies.

Hello, I'm Roy and I'm the legendary last airbender.

2010-09-15T00:42:00.004+08:00

ohohohohho, it's Mr Lee Jungshin's birthday as of today! I'm sure that Mrs Lee would be very happy to package herself over to korea as his birthday present! Mr Kang, please treat your room-mate nicely ok? I buy Lor Mee for you as award!

Finally some time to blog because I'm so busy like busybusy bumblebee (fail at describing). I told myself that I cannot eat anything after 10pm and only eat at least one meal a day. Not working because I always end up eating like bread, pastries. But luckily it's not a full meal with rice. Talk about carbohydrates, Anwar has to mention that they make people fat and by eating bread or anything flour related including rice will make me fat. Ok fine, I don't eat anything then I'll stave myself until my stupid baby fats on my face goes down. :(

Suddenly misses 01, 02 and 05. I guess you guys know that I'm referring to you! So sorry that my school schedule is making things very difficult for us to meet. P2 is ending soon, don't worry! By then I got the whole month to roll around and exercise! Let's play badminton sometime! I don't always want to meet then eat macs let alone breakfast, then grow fat fat. HAHAHA!

I actually cut myself some slack and took 2 days off from work, Friday and Saturday respectively. Friday was meant to do some self-commitments which I think I should finally get down to some hobby on-doings. Lazy mornings which I dreaded to cycle out to get ingredients so I made use of what I have at home. I'm cheapskate ok, look at the pathetic amount of ingredients. No meat somemore! I replaced alot of the ingredients which was supposedly on the recipe but I don't care, I'm just cooking according to my instincts and I want to say that it went pretty well. Onions were making out their foul stupid eye-stinging aura that I could bearly open my eyes! I don't like cutting onions pl0x. Gojuchang sauce is very spicy! I want to die eating the ricecakes after I cooked them, drank like plenty amount of water also cannot save my mouth from breathing fire. HAHAHHA! So I added water and put it back into the microwave to cook again and it became not so dry and starchy. It became much better actually, and it was my lunch and dinner because I couldn't finish it. TO PROOF THAT I WAS COOKING, IN CASE PEOPLE THINK THAT I SCAM THEM JUST BY POSTING PICTURES, LOLOLOL. I TOOK PICTURES WITH MY HANDS AND ANYONE CAN TELL IT'S ME BECAUSE I HAVE ODDLY COLOURED PURPLE AND YELLOW NAILS. How in the world can Mr Kang eat cheesey spaghetti and another pot of ddeobokki (which is so spicy like hot hot spicy dogs) and yet still so SKINNY. Koreans producing pills other than their famous plastic surgery to keep people from growing fat is it?! Pills that digest fats in bodies and stop fats-mones to produce when they eat alot?! That's it, I'm moving to another continent which that food doesn't suit my 口味 then stay there for 5 months before coming back home!!!! And the rest of the day I spent on my second REVAMP project which I planned it for quite sometime but unable to carry out because my DSLR is not with me. So I got all my photo shots on it already and I still haven't gotten the chance to edit the photos yet. Later next week when P2 is over. The thought only excites me even further. Heehee.

Something which I read up sometime ago, shall just blog this out. I don't really believe much in astrology but I think it gets interesting quite if you find similarities between yourself.

The female leo is slim and elegant. She possesses beauty and attraction even in adverse circumstances. She likes to dress nicely and often reflects a royal attitude in her behaviour. - Hmm, they don't call me EMPRESS-SAMA for no reason right? LOL.

The first thing to be noticed about a Leo is their outgoing nature. They are mostly restless and cannot stay in one place for long; whether it is their home or office. They are mostly seen doing several tasks at the same time and often more than one job at a time. - Rubbish. I cannot multitask. I can't even talk to a person at the same time while sms-ing.

A Leo personality is very loveable and this trait makes them popular with their friends and social circle. They very attentively listen to the problems of other people and try their hardest to offer the best solution. Often, they are so involved in solving the problems of other people that they sacrifice their own desires or time, and regret later it. - Popular your head, I'm always the one getting bullied. LOL. The other part is damn true ok, sometimes I even regret what I've done after doing something else for someone.

Leo's are very generous towards their friends and like to be honest and loyal with them and expect the same in return. - I SEE, I SEE... *darts eye bullets at Edward Chi.

Leo's are also very courageous and responsible people. They take their responsibilities very seriously and often take it to the point of self-sacrifice. They accept people at their face value and naturally dislike a hypocrite or diplomatic person. - Yes, very agreeable on this. I don't like making empty promises, and if I don't fulfill it, it irks me. I think pride is in me as well. Oh well, you can't really blame the mother of all sins.

They often try to dominate other family members and directly or indirectly compel others to live according to their likes and dislikes.This trait sometimes creates grave problems for their family members, and especially for their better half. - HAHAHHAHA! I don't like, people also must don't like. I'm that dominating yo. Ok lah, I think sometimes need to give and take. Cannot always take take like machaim freeflow. Poor Mr Kang (LOL), I think he would be like "Ohhh, 老婆大人!!"

The Leo personality likes to receive sincere compliments, especially verbally. They don’t feel appreciated if the other person compliments them indirectly. These people always look for a direct and verbal compliment, and this is one easy way to make them happy. Another interesting trait of a leo personality is their need for attention. They very much like to be in the limelight and always try to become the centre of attention in any gathering. It makes no surprise that the leo get’s annoyed if they are being ignored. This trait is so powerful that for a time being they may forget all of the past favours or qualities of that person who is ignoring them, and react very aggressively. - Go straight to the point. Tense. Oh and .. I'M AN ATTENTION-WHORE. Agree on this part, I want people to pay attention to me which normally people don't :(

Lies, betrayal, deceit, cheating and back-biting, these all are the things which seriously offend a Leo personality. Other horoscope signs often forgive and forget, but the Leo is an extreme astrology sun sign in this regard and very rarely they will forgive. - OH MY GAWD ON THIS. LOL. I don't know how to react when I read that! So what I've been saying that I'm not angry and I forgave.. it's all totally bullshit?! Maybe it's just the inner personality?

For a Leo personality, love is a dramatic ideal. Leo males and females find it very easy to attract other people because they naturally have a physical attraction.
When a Leo is in love, they become very romantic and proud of their loved one. Their approach is very generous toward their loved ones, and are attentive and loyal to their needs.They are caring, protective and supportive and often make great sacrifices and fight to death for their love.In return, the Leo personality expects to be treated like royalty and to be expressly adored by their loved one very often. They ask for total commitment and like that their partner should be dependent upon them in some way. - Brb, forever laughing. Thats I'm called 老婆大人! :)

Break-ups are very difficult for a Leo personality to survive. They become wounded and it takes a lot of time for them to psychologically recover. They may become very wary of risking serious love again, and therefore may indulge in just flirting and nothing more. When a Leo personality seriously wants to get separated, their pride makes it very difficult to say the things in a straight forward manner. Rather they take an indirect approach and slowly withdraw their contacts with their partner.If their partner does not confront them and continues to cling onto them, then the leo may become very cruel, psychologically.Therefore, it is best to discuss the matter openly with a Leo personality if you notice that the Leo partner is slowly withdrawing from their commitments. - I find this very true, because seriously I think for me, it's really "Once Bitten Twice Shy" not only on love life but also in other matters regarding decision making. And thinking about the slowly redrawing, it's like hibernating and I like doing that as well.

credit sources

Weird isn't it that your astrologic sign actually reflects quite alot about yourself. But I try not to believe too much on these because it's so ... unscientific and whatever they mentioned sounds like they have been monitoring a leo from their start of life to death for their personality and then derive to this conclusion. Everyone has their own personal traits and I guess, everyone is just different in every other way.

Doing some mass house-kepping for my livejournal after P2, clearing off some friends and also some communities. Need to rework on my livejournal layout because I left it half-done. The background doesn't suit the new seulong graphical implanted stuff and it needs revamping.

Remember when I said that I wanted to dream something nice? Well, one night I dreamt that Minhyuk hated me. He told me I was fat all over and he didn't like my face or whatsoever and told me that my whole attitude stink. I mean, what the hell? I'm not that fat and I'm even lighter than him! What kind of stupid dream is this?! Why nothing good comes out when I dream of Kang Minhyuk. First one was no better, he told me that he hated me for all the fangirling stuff I typed or write about him! My brain works in a funny way, I think it was before I slept I was watching or thinking of something related to that particular subject and I will dream of it. One night, I was watching Shiki and it was about vampires, and that night I dreamt that I died. And there was such thing such as the underworld. My mother actually sent me off (when I am even dead?!) by car and she told me that she will burn paper money for me so that I can lead a good afterlife. Then I told her no because there is no such thing as afterlife, and after I have died everything just stopped there. I even asked her if she's going to have a wake for me and she told me yes, for 3 days. Then others which I cannot remember who told me that I can still come back to the real world and visit them and my dog will know about it because they can sense presence of their owner. Totally speechless with that dream and I jumped out of bed when I woke up and told my mother of the tomfoolery which took place in my head while I'm asleep. She was equally speechless as well.

p/s: This blog will go into a happier mood, FQ says that my blog is getting very emo. I can't believe that all my previous old posts are all very happy ones indeed! Emo =/= Dark coloured blogskin colours!!!!!!

Crazy, just crazy.

TIme for Confessions / Time for Change

2010-09-07T03:15:00.005+08:00

Seulong! I am so smittened by you! Kekeke! This is their most recent performance I think? And I like how the 2AM boys looked in this performance! Biased to only screencap Seulong. Kwon will get his share too later!

Can't believe my 2 favourite members from 2am are in Dirty Eye Girls. Do not judge me on who I like ok! And if you're going to do so because they did Dirty Eye Girls thus they are gay, you're just upset because you can't shake your hips lusciously so stop complaining about my tastes! Seulong and Kwonnie is 2AM love! /heart

I was wrong wrong wrong
Your words were so, so, so sweet that
I didn’t realize you were playing me, me, me
with your words, words, words everyday.

The stories regarding your other men
The stories regarding your behavior
I tried to ignore and pretended that I didn’t hear but

The way you act when you are intoxicated
The way you smile at my friend
Change it Stop it
Even though I tell you many times

I never actually went to google up on the lyrics translation for "I Did Wrong" until now and I realised how ... uh, let's say similar to certain slice of life story I've seen. Seems like some possessive song, like I cannot let you smile at my friend because I think you might be having affair with him/her. You cannot talk about other women because it irks me because I have to say I'm jealous. Okay, so this is what it means on what Seulong and Kwonnie were singing. And I was just blindly singing the lyrics not even knowing what the hell I am singing. HAHAHA! The number of plays on Itunes have surpassed "I'm a Loner" already :( CNBlue please do something back to gain my attention please! 2AM is sucking me deep into their hypnosis hole already that I heard they're album songs over and over and I don't get bored!

I also got 2PM songs and I found out how biased is that 2PM has more songs than 2AM like many many more included different remix of their songs. What in the world?! Please be fair to the AM peeps! And by hearing 2PM does not mean I like them ok, I still stand as a loyal 2AM fan and I tell people to shoo shoo if they prefer PM to AM. HAHA! But it's a more joking way, because I think AM really needs more fans! :( And I know Jasmine and Triz, I know you're reading and I'm directing this to youuuuu, AM IS BETTER THAN PM ANYTIME AND ANYHOO. You can have your Wooyoung and Junho and I can be happy with Kwonnie and Ajibem Seulong! (even though Seulong is being shared!!!!!) Someone please agree with me that Chansung looks like Ron Ng in any way I look at him.

My purpose of blogging is because Anwar told me something today and I feel as though ... I don't know how to describe. He overheard my phonecall with FQ for a short while and he said that I have to forgive. Stop making me sound like some grudge holder, because I am not angry anymore! It's not that I cannot forgive, I forgave and it's just that I cannot bring myself to face certain things. I'm getting sick and tired of people scolding me over and over the same thing. I have to spare a thought of the people around me also because it's not only affecting me but also those around me, my friends and all. I repeat again, I am not angry anymore because I think I was in the wrong also. I have nothing to say or objections to practically anything to what's what so the best way is to shut up. The result of alot things is because I cannot keep my mouth shut and I said things which should not be said and thus, I am also labeled as the one who also made a mistake - not only the other party. I feel as though I am unable to put down and totally sever ties with people just like that, I am not heartless enough to do so. This is an utter disappointment, because if I were strongwilled enough, I would have do what I was told to delete the phone number, msn contact. HAHA! But I cannot ok? And I am very unhappy with that fact that within the whole 2 months which I had no interaction with the clique I had peaceful non-angry days and when I'm rather unfortunately in talking terms with certain people, my angry days are coming back again. I don't like it *said in Abuklau's slang* that's why I'm going back to hibernating and I do not want anyone to stick in their legs and hands into patching up because I want nature to take it's course. If we are destined to still be friends, then let fate make that happen.

My struggle with my face is finally over, finally I'm back to no pimple face and I feel more secure about my looks again. Stupid P2, I can't wait for you to be over in about 3 weeks and I will have peace at home for 1 month! My mother wants me to work but how to work for only 1 month?! Like who wants to hire? Or else if anyone got lobang, please let me know!

Wasted $2 on pathertic lunch when I thought I was going to play L4D2 just now when Yong actually flew the aeroplane. I made my home on the tacky 158 bus today instead of the train and I thought, maybe I'll make life better by heading down to parkway tomorrow to buy KOI Caramel Milktea. And also to buy some snacks while I worked my ass off the week when stupid Interim 2 is up again next week and the other 2 groups doing the same topic are presenting on different days than us! Not funny.

Ok, Sleep. Sweet dreams of Kwonnie, Seulong and Minhyuk! p/s I dreamt of a bloody dream 2 nights before and last night, it was sweet because Kwonnie and Ajibem were in it! I'll blog it out if I've got time!

Baby, you breaking my heart. Baby, you hurting my heart.

2010-08-31T03:41:00.004+08:00

Just realized that Kwonnie also has the smile which could light up even the darkest days. It makes you think that he looks like a lunatic but he smiles as though it's from deep down inside his heart. Ajibeam Seulong has BEATS by Dr. Dre headphones, I want! It's better than that lousy Mameshiba earphones I bought. Looks nice on the outside but the sound quality suck to the max! Ajibeam Seulong is very good looking too! 8)

"I Did Wrong" officially surpassed Lucifer by the number of times played on my itunes. But still lesser than "I'm a Loner". I'm very obsessed that I actually loop the song! This is crazy I swear, and I will start admitting that I like 2AM thanks to JoKwon and Seulong (Ajibeam!!)

I seriously want to cry looking at the condition of my face, one day it was just a nice and smooth then now it's like having some major ache pimples partying on my face. I don't usually get pimples that often and this time it's because I didn't squeeze my blackhead properly from my face then it start to swell! It didn't go down for days and then another one popped out yesterday which hurts like crazy! My poor face and I spammed pimple cream and aloe vera like it will help out with going down, I am annoyed and not happy over this. I cannot sleep to recuperate my face either thanks to bloody p2.

Speaking about p2, I need to rant. I am so bloody pissed with whatsoever is going right now because they told us that it could work out and then just a few days ago they told us NO. You have to bloody start from scratch again. Not funny seriously, the whole entire 2 weeks of YOG break is wasted just like that and we have to come up with concepts that will save our asses. We need to stop being so ambitious because it's killing the whole entire website layout. Panning is a very good idea but not for a hybrid layout! And the one that Yong(CM) showed which he liked alot is totally not my style or neither it is to my liking. Ugh, I don't want our end product to look something like that because I will not enjoy doing whatsoever! Ughh, pissed! So I cracked my brains for a few days and yesterday night's layout which I spent making has went down the drain, like awesome. It doesn't even work! So today I worked on another layout which i proposed that I would do a isolation kinda website, with flash mainpage and subsequent html cum flash hybrid pages along with it. I don't care whether my design style is too cute or what, even these cute or whatsoever website appeal to us poly students to check them out and let alone childishness will not attract to student in the secondary school? I'm making assumptions but I don't care, all I know is that I'm not going for the freaking serious tone for the website layout and neither I want it to look like the one Yong suggested! This is site by the way Click here for uhhh, site I swear P3 and P4 will be something to my liking and also my own personal touch and feel which I proposed it all in Vpress, hell yeah I want those concepts! I'll make a virtual circus with stop motion capture with my camera and my dorries are gonna be my model!! So looking at the website layout I proposed, it has a very calm feel and I think it doesn't relate to kindness at all, but whatever. The website is only the cosmetic of the whole entire thing and most importantly, the content is important yo! So much ideas all thrown out to build concepts but then all thrashed out by you know who. Pissing off, really pissing off. My poor KIndnessville will never see the light of the World Wide Web ;___;

I'm really a greedy person. I want to be capable of doing practically everything, like able to play the guitar, flute, er-hu .. cook practically delicious mouth-watering dishes to the masses who would appreciate my cooking, able to take breath-taking photography shots with my camera and awe everyone who saw them, I want to be pretty so that people would take a second look at me when they see me on the streets, being able design something which is so mind-blowing that one look at it, your head literally explodes. This totally made me into a semi-pro and I cannot say that I'm really good at anything by default, I'm no prodigy. I work hard and I don't like the fact that I'm still a semi-pro even though so many years have passed! out of the 999999999 promises I made to myself, I never actually remembered them or even fulfill them and I stuff myself with new commitments when I haven't cleared the previous backlogs. And once I don't fulfill them, or being suddenly reminded to fulfill them it taunts me like crazy and I have to tolerate it and tell myself, "Hey hey, forget about it." Stupid, seriously stupid. Being haunted by the past promises which I made, ha! I really do want to fulfill them now but I just don't know how to and besides I got no time thanks to ... BLOODY !@#$%^&* PEE2 (emphasis with CAPS!!!). How depressing this blogspot could get. I just need my mind off P2 as soon as stupid interim is over. Rest for 1 day without any nonsense shit or random people asking me to do this or that .. then I'll go on hardcore P2 mode until the stupid block is over. Yeyz.

p/s: I saw this tutorial on how to make Korean Ricecakes! I want to try them out and make my own so I can fill it awesome BBQ sauce goodness and nomz nomz nomz it. The I won't crave for the ricecakes they sell opposite at Kallang Leisure Park!

I WAS WRONG WRONG WRONG

2010-08-26T03:32:00.005+08:00

I'm not going to start going on and on about Natsu-Matsuri because it's such a long post and I'm kindda lazy. I gotten a picture with the 2 Japanese kids which house-stayed at BICBOI and Mishi's house during the weekend. It's nice meeting Saki-chan and Hana-chan on friday for dinner then we brought them to baybeats! I hope they enjoyed their stay over in Singapore. Tsu told me that Saki-chan cried when she left, I was like awwww. I miss her too! And I think I fail so much as a nanny, unable to speak a single Japanese word to them. Sorry, my japanese all went back to Kubo-sensei that all I remember now is "Tenwa-bango" which means telephone number. Ahahah. It was also one of the best nights because they all celebrated my brithday all the way till dawn! I had cakeeeeeeeee! And several good games of L4D, Damn happening I know and I rieks! Thank you those who wished me! Your wishes were deeply appreciated (;w;)

I found out that Saturday night that CNBlue was heading back to Seoul already after they showcase, I was like D: and I regretted not going to the fansign and also the showcase. If I were to know that there were lucky draw to win the member's possessions, I would have went lo! I swear if I've gotten either Minhyuk's signed drumsticks or JongHyun's guitar pick(which I can make use of) or whatsoever, I'll be a heypi galzx forevazxzx. But if were to go for the fansign, I wouldn't have met Saki-chan and Hana-chan! Ahahah! So there's always a brighter side of everything!

Saw this in Making of the Artist and I squeeled quite loudly when I saw that, too cute alright Minhyuk!
Let's say that this year, I had 3 birthday cakes including the one which my parents bought me and the last one was from Yong and Alim which they bought me cake before we played L4D on monday. I think I'm going to get fat and yet, I find that this year's birthday is rather of an quite interesting experience. I got to go baybeats again on sunday and I went with Desmond who claims that he missed out Saturday's David Choi or King Ly Chee. We only saw a few bands and the last one at Powerhouse was like machaim nightclub disco only lo, not nice. But Handsome Fur at the Arena was awesome! I got a picture with them too! But Desmond haven't sent me yet. Ahaha!

Just to let everyone know, I stopped my Selfnotes to myself on Livejournal quite some time ago because I feel there is not need for reflection anymore, somehow. I haven't been blogging since then except for the memoirs which I penned down the previous post. The day I saw Minhyuk should be remembered ok! And I think things aren't actually affecting me that much now since I got over so much things. The lingering feeling is no longer there anymore. I seem happier these days thanks to the korean craze with I jumped on the bandwagon yet AGAIN. I want to thank Minhyuk and also Jokwon and GaIn for directing my attention! I love you all deep deep! HAHAHAH!

Ok, So I actually went to read up some people entry posts and I think it's really ridiculous that some people do not actually treasure what they have right now and then complain so much about feeling all so shitty about everything should be "how it used to be". I'm not pointing fingers but seriously, there are people out there who are feeling worst because they really had no one to even talk to, being ostracize from society and you don't see them whining that they are lonely. Just make do with it. Things turn out like this for a reason and we can't help but to think this way. And why start complaining that you have no one to actually rely on?! Because you actually do! Can you at least treasure what you have with you right now and stop saying that things should be back to how it used to be. Newsflash, it's been so long and everyone knows everyone mostly inside out, and people either choose to leave or stay or forcibly being forced to leave etc. Don't complain when your situation isn't that bad and just make do with what you have right now and stay strong. If you're going to continue to complain, I can't help but to say that you must well jolly well go through the feeling of having absolutely no one at all to talk to and everyone shuns you like you're a monster. And I think that is the time you can really say "I wish things were back to how it was." Heh.

Sorry if I sounded harsh but I just cannot overlook that people don't treasure what's in front of them and yet complain. People will learn that once they lost a certain something, they will finally learn their lesson that whatsoever lost was actually their "treasure"

Watch this, I'm quite addicted to this song right now. The playhit is even higher than Orange Caramel and even the song sang by Jowkon and GaIn!

p/s I told Anwar and Yong about me wanting to wear those cute dresses as those girls in Orange Caramel and they both gave me the (-_-) face. They both say I'm too tall to be labeled as cute, how depressing this is. And Yong said that I would look cuter if I were wearing a bear suit. Wthhhh.

EVENTFUL, YES. AND I HAVE TO SAY I'M IN LOVE.

2010-08-20T02:51:00.005+08:00

Yes, I'm totally in love with the boy whose picture is above :)

Today was one of the worst day which totally made me so upset when the whole day started. Firstly, I didn't sleep much last night thanks to me finishing up the Carnival Navigations. My dad forgotten that I was supposed to head to school then he took such a long time to get all his stuff done before I can leave the house. Time yet wasted. I slept on the bus like one log, unglam to the max and my hair was major chui. I didn't straighten my fridge and it looked like crap. I also totally forgot to bring my phone out today. Roy is stupid and yet dumb. Tense ah. I headed to school, during discussions, my stockings tore. Not funny, but then my skirt was covering so I managed salvage it and continue wearing it.

Secondly, one of the most pissing. Okay, not really pissing .. more of annoyance. Someone came to class in a shirt which I longed to have since forevazxzxzxzxz. And I got annoyed because I never gotten enough money to get it and it was the damn colour which I wanted also. One more annoying thing which adds to that is that that person knew how badly I actually wanted that shirt and I swear that he bought that shirt on purpose or else otherwise I don't know. Never was it mentioned that he wants that shirt as well! The big number "3" at the back and also the sleeves but I wanted the one which says "United States" and today I was like secretly imagining myself biting my blanket in envious! But heck, I didn't take notice after that when I was busy watching BB Theory along with Silent Hill "THE ROOM", dumb game like seriously. Floating zombies siol.

My dad screamed at me to leave the school at the point of time but I got carried away in watching IT the clown and got my ass scared for the Nth time before I actually left school. No Pedo clown is going to come after me because I know that by spraying inhailer and also catapult it, the stupid clown will die. Eat me if you like! Uh huhuh! Okay, so I reached Stadium around 6.45pm and I was damn late to meet my cousin who just came over from Hong Kong. Another depressing thing, some friends flew to Hong Kong today and I spent last night telling them where are the awesome places to head to when they are there. I misses curry fishball. Smses started to flood in when I checked my phone and I was greeted with news that today was the day that CNBlue would be touching down at Changi Airport. Okay, I spasm on the car when I found out that I got dinner at Boon Keng and also I wearing like some chui chui aunty and I want to see my Kang MinHyuk?! Not funny luh, I mean for first impression. I told myself and practically everyone knows that I will wear my best when I see them at the airport because I'm unable to get the tickets and I'm not willing to pay either. SO SO SO. I still went in the end. I was happy that I went becauseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

I AM OFFICIALLY IN LOVE WITH KANG MINHYUK, BEFORE THAT IT WAS OK BUT I THINK I AM OFFICALLY CRAZY OVER HIM. YOU KNOW WHY? I TELL YOU WHY. I was helping Eve to fancam then guess what, I was holding my phone and her phone so yeah, and I got advantage of my height so I am able to capture a pretty good view. Hur! But when they came out, first was Jungshin and guess who was after that! It was Minhyukkie! He was in shades and a white beanie! AND AND THE BEST PART WHEN HE WAS RIGHT NEAR ME HE LOOKED, SMILED AND NODDED HIS HEAD. LIKE OH MY GOOD LORD WRY ARE YOU SO KUTE MINHYUK! NODDED AT MY DIRECTION, LIKE MIND YOU. Okay maybe the straw hat was alittle distracting, but ahahahahah! I got my favourite's attention! I am so freaking happy prz. Then I didn't cared about Yonghwa and Jonghyun. I'm so sorry! But I'm not really a fan of Yonghwa and I equally like Jungshin and Jonghyun! Heeheeeeeeees. Minhyuk is always the best in my heart. AHAHHA! ROY'S GOTTEN ANOTHER VICTIM WOOOOH. I was so happy that I practically dieded over and over again with spazzing out thinking about Minhyuk and only Minhyuk. Feels good to keep your mind off things as well when you have such a cute little boyboy to be crazy over! I love going high on times and I think I don't know what I'm typing now.

I'm pretty, ya'know curious why is Minhyuk actually the most underated member of CNBlue. Is it because he's always behind the drums and you cannot see him? Poor boy, he needs more love! I don't see what Yonghwa has and he doesn't? He's got then cutest smile ever and I'm so attracted to it when I first saw it. I debated whom I prefered more between him and Yonghwa and I chose him in the end. Yonghwa suddenly became my least favourite member somehow, I don't know why either. But I love boys with cute smiles which will brighten your day even if it was raining cat and dogs. Geeky boys with framed glasses and also a height which is taller and extraordinary. I'm being picky because my future husband needs to be taller than me of course. I'm hilariously tall and only peanut full of people I know are taller than me especially girls. Minhyuk seems pretty much different from Changmin the previous Kpop artist which I got a crush on. Except that both names have "Min" in them. HAHA! I'm not really sure about Minhyuk's attitude though cause I don't go snooping around youtube for their videos. I'm a very closet CNBlue fan until recently. Going to this airport session was one of the craziest thing I'll ever do ok. Feels awkward as well, because I feel as though I'm a crazy fan of theirs which I am clearly not.

So I concluded that today started out bad then it became good later, I AM REALLY HAPPY THAT I MADE THE DECISION TO HEAD DOWN OK. BECAUSE IT WAS FATE THAT I MANAGED TO GET MY PHONE BACK THEN REALISED THAT THEY WERE COMING TODAY. AHAHAH shoot me please. I'm talking about fate seriously, FATE. Like fate can do anything like bring 2 people who aren't talking together in a awkward position. Talk about fate yeah?

Reality vs. Fiction

2010-08-03T02:00:00.004+08:00

LIVE-ACTION
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VESUS
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ANIME

Agreed that both Takumis are freaking hot.
Disagreed with Naoki's live-action actor and also NANA 2's Ren.
Oh my gawd, I'm so totally in love with Takumi and Tetsuji Tamayama as Takumi /bimbos

Even now I just keep calling your name.

2010-07-26T03:21:00.008+08:00

Let me tell you a story.
It was fate that brought us together.
I do not want you to think that it was your fault for introducing me to him because it was something which I deeply wanted and besides you just wanted me to happy.
There was so much things that I want to tell you but I was afraid and also you weren't there all the time. I'm scared, I really am.
Hey Nana, even now I just keep calling your name.

Was it really Nana's fault for introducing Takumi to Hachi? Was it? He's so handsome but he's such a jerk. Hachi, why to you just keep clinging onto the hope that he'll come find you once the live was over. Everyday you think of him. You even cried when you saw him on television. You do not know what were the things he said behind your back. You are just merely one of his play things and once he's got you, you can never refrain from running away from him. Maybe because you loved him, hmm loved him? Or do you just like love him because he was your favourite TRAPNEST member? You have fallen to the state that you're so desperate for him that you think so much about it and it makes you do really stupid things. Why, why didn't you have the courage to reject him when the relationship wasn't as deep.

Knowing your favourite star maybe was a dream come true even I want that to happen too. But Nana shows the possibility that even dreams too come true in real life and life just could be like that. Making the wrong decision is of course the worst, falling for the wrong man is the "highest" of the worst. Shits happens in real life and it makes me indulge so much into NANA that I can't help but to compare how is it similar to real life. Little setbacks just totally just trash back to reality and you can't help but to connect the dots and weep for them in the anime and also for yourself.

Takumi, why are you such a jerk. Why can't you be a good guy for once and consider Hachi's feelings for you that she's going crazy while waiting for you. Everyday she waits for your phone call and wait for you to come to her.

Yes, I'm attracted to Hachi and Takumi's love story in the anime. And I love Trapnest too! Changed my wallpaper from Minhyuk to them. Even though I wanted the picture of the poster Hachi has on her bedroom wall. But this was the best I could find. For my Revamp project, I was thinking that I should also print a poster of TRAPNEST and stick it on my wall just like Hachi! Even though this band is as successful on the surface but shits also happens behind the scenes with Reira, Takumi and Ren. I swear Takumi's really hot but then I just keep remembering and harping on that fact that he's totally a fucked up jerk. _|_'

Credits to -Posiongirl- @ Flickr
I flickr'ed Takumi and guess what I found! Takumi Taeyang! Damn cute please! I want one too, but Sebastian doesn't look like Takumi at all and I want a Hachi to go along with him. (even though I still despise them together but I'm most interested in their relationship)I love how happy Hachi looks in the picture when she's hugging Takumi. It makes me go Awwwww :'D this is how it should be in the manga! But obvious slice of life doesn't usually end up this way.

But I don't want to be independent. I want to keep running to you whenever I can. Being independent hurts so much.

Just sharing some of thoughts these few days. Since it wouldn't be boring if I added pictures along with it.

Neither here nor there.

2010-07-23T01:43:00.005+08:00

REVAMP PROJECT - #01

Click here
Click there for more pictures and info on REVAMP PROJECT

Nothing to see here, except for a few stuff that I'm going to post about randomly.
This blog will no longer be the place for self-reflecting because I'm moving it all to Livejournal and it's private to me and only me to read. So I'm sort of on probation currently. The place to vent some frustrations and also some thoughts is most definitely not here anymore. Sorry. I'll try my best to update some stuff here when I feel like it.

I don't know whether I'm stupid or what, I thought people are actually listening/watching Kaikan Phrase now because I mistook everyone's listening to "Lucifer" to Kaikan Phrase the main band ya'know. But I was wrong because it's actually a song just released by SHINEE/Shinehhh/Shineeeeee and it's also called "Lucifer". Don't know whether to be labeled stupid or not. But I don't catch the kpop wave and I'm sinking into the ocean along with my yellow surfboard.

I hate it when you make a friend, and then you guys start being close and you text each other a lot and you guys tell each other almost everything. But then later, everything slowly dies up to the point where you guys don’t even talk anymore.

I wish that I knocked my head at some curb pavement and I lost all my memories or just managed to block out that certain memory of something. My only glimmer of running away.

Yes, I still feel dumb D:

Know where you stand.

2010-07-18T04:56:00.012+08:00

I'm a stupid web designer, and I know html and yet still i got my blogskins code from blogskins.com. This is utterly shameless yes, but I think I should just stick to a simple layout and stop making my sacred heaven into so flamboyant.

Mundane life just these few days. Mundane means not sleeping enough and heading to bed during the early mornings 9am and snooze till class starts. Anyway yes, I got myself started on something which I never thought I'll be doing. Yong's and Alex's birthday seems to be a day apart. I kindda forgot Alex's birthday last year and I didn't wish him either, I felt kindda bad so I decided to give him something this year. And for Yong, that's for being there when I need you and tried to treat me to hip-hop jelly. Va bene Va bene! You need to stop your stage-frightness!

I think the whole process is rather brain wrecking and I never thought it would be so difficult. Choosing the colours is fine, but arranging them is a super killer. I first started off with Alex's card because I need to pass to him during the weekend, so I made that golden flower first. It was an ugly shade of peach so I sprayed it golden and added golden glitter to the edges. Then I started to realise that it's not going to fit in anywhere and I got kindda pissed with the whole entire thing. I tried not to give up and then my mum suggested that I should just put the birdcage there. Talk about adults being anal and supersticious about birdcages on birthday cards it's because it symbolises uh, no freedom. Hahaha! So she insisted that I should put the bird outside the cage and make it sing. Took me 2 days to finish Alex's one because I seriously dread the whole entire layout and I had to keep tackling the colour matching. I don't want to use colours that clash which makes it really ugly. Okay, so my final product is something like the second picture, but that picture was taken today morning which I haven't finish sticking the jewels and ribbons on yet.

I dreaded doing Yong's one until around 12am then I sat down and started doing, my mother got angry because I didn't start on it earlier until midnight. Yes, I have to admit I dread designing this because it's so difficult! But I did so anyways because I refused to buy a already made card from my mother as it seems like there's not sincerity by doing that. I picked out the card colour, then did the side boarder then I realised that I really have no idea what to put on the card. I suddenly remembered that I had those beads which I used to make cup mats with then I decided to make the logo of Batman (since Yong likes Batman) . I think it looks ridiculous on the card, Ahaahaha! It looks out of place also! But heck, I glued it down already :( I actually made 2 of those Batman logo because the first one was kindda big and I used grey transparent beads. Then I added the frames, flowers blah blah blah. I'm sorry that if the card's is not to both of your liking, because IMO I would add so much girly stuff like laces on the cards but I think it's not really something I should give a guy and uh, the colours I want to use are usually black, red which is not auspicious for birthdays also. Ahaha! I cut the letters out for the inside and I suddenly remembered that I wanted to actually cut TYH for Yong's. So it'll be like to TYH from TYS. Hahahah! Forgot about that and I'm not going to recut so I'm leaving it like that. FYI, my mum takes around 3 hours to make a card and she's selling them for $25 and she only got back $15 for the effort she put in. Heh. Okay, so she will calculate how much materials I've used then she will charge me accordingly, I mean after all it's not nice to use her stuff for my own benefits.

I actually fried my Laptop Adaptor and it's beeping whenever I plugged it in. There's no current flowing through and I can't charge my laptop nor use it. So I'm on pc these days and I'm not used to the huge screen all over again. My dad says that my laptop is still on warranty and I can get the adaptor replaced but the problem is whether did I even sign up for the warranty is a problem. I'm so in hot soup.

You know Pengs, after you told me everything yesterday. I seem to have noticed that I'm being exactly like that jerk has been to me. It's been totally like you're in my situation when it comes to the friendship between me and him. What am I doing seriously? I think I got quite amount of influences from him as well and I can't believe I'm actually doing that to other people the way he's treating me. Not that I'm going to push the blame onto him for changing my like this, but the fact is there that I am treating you like this! Actually not that I can remember but I don't remember you trying to help me and him patch up? You don't need to anyways. You're also right that I need to grow up and make my own decisions. I should stop relying on people, but sometimes all I want is someone to listen. Just listen and need not provide any advice.

Looking at the other situation I'm facing, no news. I think hours spent writing a letter has gone down the drain because I think he threw it away before reading it. Who knows? And it's better not to ask as well. It's good that 2 months + 2 weeks of not seeing each other during P2 makes me think positive and it's also the time to get back on track and not hop into another lane and get myself killed by a runaway train. For now, all I worry is for the person who is currently my substitute (bhb to say this, but I know things alright?).

I realised that so many people are back in Singapore for holidays and I haven't really much catch up with them. And people who have phones machaim equals to no phone, annoying ttm.

The bond between us has come apart and is dying away everyday

2010-07-16T01:09:00.006+08:00

I can't help to be so addicted to this song even thought the dance is so cheesy. Haha! Yes, the song beat is rather addictive luh. Yong keep saying they are so gay but I beg to differ cause I think they all are quite good looking IMO. Maybe I'm only biased to James!

As you can see,

It came to my mind in the early morning yesterday as I was gathering up the broken pieces of glass, "What the heck is this?" when I cut my finger and blood was dripping down which brought me back to reality.. "Is this what we really hoped for?" I knew it from the bottom of my heart that the hardest choice has to be made because my love refuses it but I do not want to contradict myself either. And I wonder when I can tell it to you? In the slowly decaying world, I'm struggling but that's the only way. Always craving for your faded smiles and that's I finally pulled out the "plug".

I screamed out my frustrations but they all re-bounce back to me and it echoes in vain. There's nothing left for me to be connected to you and while I am standing here all by myself, all alone.. All those things that happen and has already happened. What brought us together is now falling apart, then I said "No matter what we do, life is like that", your tears just started flowing down your cheeks slowly.

Yesterday a tranquil night made me realised that it's really useless to pick up the fallen petals because it will never bloom again and it is already dead in my palms - our time stopped long time ago.

I remembered the season when we first met and I could not forget your gracious smile however thinking of such memories would actually hurt so much. With this continuous dull relationship, I still love you though and I don't want to be apart from you but I have to tell you that ..

Even if I'm so determined, rain seeps past my shelters and soaks me with a coldness that nothing can defrost. The bond between us has come apart and is dying away everyday.

Just once, just one.
I wish that my wish would come true - to be reborned again so that I can go through those days with you again. "Goodbye my sweetheart, it's all over" was all I could think of and we have to learn to leave without turning back.

Just be Friends.

Io non sono affetti da indigestione

2010-07-10T06:22:00.004+08:00

Yeah 6am, not asleep still because I just finished my floor-plans layout for my kiosk. It looks half-assed done and I find that I'm losing all my creativity on the whole entire design layout, like I have no freedom of design because it's for the museum and I cannot do anything childish because it's THE MUSEUM. It looks so stagnant and so simple that I want to puke blood looking at it. I really miss those foundation modules when we still got a chance to explore ways of design, I really do miss taking 3D art!

Click me

Well yeah, I was just reading that and when I wanted to strike a conversation when he went offline.... (flip tables) When I finally puckered up all the courage I had and poof it goes down the drain. Damn irritating and it's not funny. I feel stupid, really stupid. I was clinging onto my phone waiting for smses because for the amount of time I waited no smses came back to me. I'm not that impatient really but then this time the waiting time feels like dying because you don't know whether the person will reply back or not. And I also got a random sms from Rahman saying that he and Limin got together and it's real. Like whut, when showering it came in several others but it's all from Rahman. LOL? But I did at least got a reply from her unlike someone who made me keep staring at the phone at random stupid moments making me feel like a utterly foolish fool. I'm not pissed really but at least you know, reply? No matter how pissed you are, can you at least reply. I think my patience really went table flippin' when he went offline so I sent another sms saying that AT LEAST REPLY BACK BECAUSE I AM STUPIDLY WAITING FOR YOUR REPLY BACK. No, this does not mean that I'm love-sick that I miss his voice and I cannot do without him or whatsoever, I just want to apologize ok? I'm not going to nag at anyone, it's more like people would be nagging at me. I'm going to accept being nagged at because I know that I really need or worth being scolded for whatever I have done. Sheesh, well he did reply saying that he's not feeling well and talk another time. SEE, REPLY. such short sentences could be replied within a few seconds and I have to yearningly wait for around more than 4 hours or so to get that damn reply. Ok, I should stop typing in a way that makes me sound like I'm damn pissed.

Thanks ah, I literally went (T_T) when I saw the reply from twitter.

As I was saying to Yong regarding my indigestion theory, I think I should share it here as well because I think people just really get the wrong idea of what people talking on the phone every night works. Seriously, talking every night on the phone doesn't mean that two people are a couple. Talking every night suddenly becomes a routine, and it's like shitting. Everyday you shit, it means you're healthy. But what if suddenly one day you stop shitting, you will start to think "Aye, what happened? Why didn't I shit today? Is there something wrong? I'm suffering from indigestion is it?!" or maybe go like, "I think I forgot to do something today, what is it? (fidget)" same goes with the every night talking on the phone system, people will tend to think what is wrong when the other party doesn't call then your brain will start exclaiming "OH MY MOTHER, WHAT DID I DO? DID I LIKE PISS HIM OFF TODAY THEN HE NEVER CALL ME? OH MY GOD SHOULD I CALL HIM INSTEAD? HOW HOW? D:" yeah, you get my point. But after prolong people will get use to the feeling even though it might be difficult though, but I'm sure that people might pull through this. But this doesn't work for the indigestion theory because if you don't shit for around 5 days, that's definitely NOT OKAY.

So you see, it's not actually love to begin with. Or else some people might beg to differ from what I've typed. So far that's logical and I'm actually experiencing it sometimes as well. Even Yong. LOL! But I'll just pre-occupy myself with other stuff so I won't think about it and keeping your mind occupied is a remedy that actually works. Heh heh.

Thank god, I'm not going to cos during TGX because it's going to kill my brain cells if I did. I think I might head down tomorrow to take a look after I make my way back to the museum again to take more pictures of the various locations. I feel like it's going to be a solo day tomorrow and I'm going to get some stuff done. But Tsu's not cosplaying tomorrow which is making me think twice on going to TGX. I think Verse, Jo they all are cosing so might as well just head down since I really need some nightlife. I really hate nightclass ommmmmmmgggggggggggggggggggg. Speaking of nightclass I passed my previous test which I didn't study for and wiki-ed the whole entire night (that night which I posted the previous post) but I failed my mock test just by alittle today. I'm not worrying because I made alot of careless mistakes or else I would have pass which shows that Okay- I'm capable of passing even without studying. So if I study, I'm going to score higher! I'm pinning my hopes on group work and speaking because I really don't want to fail this module nor Interface. I want to peacefully go Korea/Japan next year with the class because it's going to be lots of fun and I get to go stalk Minhyuk if it's possible. Heh heh. It's not like Joanne's not going to stalk her Ah Chun.

I really want to cosplay Genbu Kaiden, after seeing Angie cosplaying Takiko makes me want to cosplay her too! That time I ever thought of cosplaying Uruki but I think it would be damn weird if I didn't have Takiko or any of the 7 celestial warriors of Genbu with me. I wanted to make Hayden and Dahlia to cosplay too but I never gotten a chance to sew their costume. Maybe I will do the yukata version of this for Hayden and Dahlia since I know how to sew a yukata, I think it should work? When I told Tsu that I was very interested in Fushigi Yuugi she just ... gave me the -_- face. I learnt that we should learn to appreciate Miaka and Tamahome more after watching Fushigi Yuugi OVA 3 which I freaking didn't know it existed. Okay, so I drowned myself with it last night along with horrible boring Italian Opera and I really hate some loser in the show who's so jealous of Miaka. She has a crush on Tamahome and she's envious and yet jealous of Miaka because both of them got married. Aww, but it's so cute to see some of them reincarnated into little children like Nuriko and Hotohori. :'D But ..... I still don't like the whole entire Priestess of Suzaku and Seiryuu arc because Genbu's one pwns them best. Star-crossed lovers are one of the best stories to read even though it thugs people's heart-strings! I also saw the scans for chapter 32, of course Uruki didn't have sex with Takiko because Takiko knew that if she is no longer a virgin she cannot summon Genbu. And the reason why Uruki wanted to do that was because he wants to prevent her from summoning Genbu so that she will not be a sacrifice to Genbu after she made her 3 wishes. Awww, I know :'D

Not fair seriously because Tamahome managed to reincarnate into Miaka's world as Taka and they lead a very happy life together. Unlike the 2 previous preistess Takiko and __________ (Byakko's priestess) who never gotten a chance to be with the man they love even in their own world or maybe until they die. Not fair huh? But Yuu Watase cannot change her plot for Genbu because the ending of the story was already decided in Fushigi Yuugi Suzaku's arc. So yeah T______T

Okay, I go and sleep now. I want my DS to play the Fushigi Yuugi Otome game which I recently downloaded. Since I couldn't find the PSP version last time but they released it on another a platform which makes me so damn happy. I don't really want to play another girl other than Takiko because I don't want the extra character (which is me) to end up with the real main character's lover. For the Suzaku warriors, I still haven't decided to go after yet, maybe Tasuki or Hotohori? Heh heh! I'm not going to Tamahome even though my impression of him got better alittle but yuck.

SLEEP NOW, I need to stop bullshitting on my blog.

P/S Once again, I am veh happy and also I want to cosplay Genbu Kaiden. Wooooooooh!

P P/S I love Uruki, so hot like one dog!

If only there's such a book.

2010-07-07T01:12:00.008+08:00

While on the way home a few days ago, I walked on the stoney pavement when I accidentally kicked something on the floor. I look down and what was on the path in front of me. It was a book, I was curious I picked it up. On the way home on the bus, I got even more curious to know what inside the book so I opened it. There was a sudden bright shining light that shone out of no where and everything when black.

I woke up, yes I did and I found myself no longer on the way home but I was somewhere else. Surrounding me was filled with snow and I was shivering because of the little amount of clothes I was wearing. Suddenly someone squat down in front of me, he stared at me. He had chestnut brown hair and also a pair of slender brown eyes and he was smiling. He stared and he stared then he reached out his hands and pulled me up. I stood there unable to say anything, then he took off his coat and gave it to me. Not a word, he patted my head then walked away.

I was indeed shocked then I snapped back to reality after realizing that I am really really not where I'm supposed to be now. What are the people wearing? I could have sworn that I went back to the past in ancient China. I walked further clutching onto the coat the man gave me and walked into a small village. Kids were prancing around the snow playing who can eat the most ice and woman are hanging out their laundry after having to wash them at the lake. It was odd, way odd. Where am I exactly? Whlist I was concentrating on my surrounding, I didn't notice that I bumped into someone, that person was strong so I fell onto the ground. When I look up, it was him - the one who gave me the coat.

.
.
.
.
.

It was so long when that happened and here I am typing about this. How could we be star-cross lovers? Do I really deserve to die? Like this? When I was killed by the genetic sickness which was pass down from my mother to me? I was separated from him forever and I'll never see him again and we are no longer able to have each other in our arms, embracing a warm loving hug. I was able to fulfill my duty as a priestess, I summoned the God and I saved the country but I was unable to be with the one I love most even though I was not a living sacrifice given to the God. I wonder how would he be like without me? A few days in my time is around 1 month in the book. How many days have passed since I passed on and how long did he agonized in pain?

I feel sad, really sad for what is going to happen in Genbu Kaiden, I crapped out the top part because I thought if that were ever happened to me, that would be the awkward situation. I feel for Takiko and Rimudo because it was predestined in Fushigi Yuugi (even though that show was written before Genbu Kaiden, but historically, the first priestess was Takiko) that Takiko would be killed by her father. It isn't fair for people like that because they can't fight fate. I know if I were to continue reading on Genbu Kaiden, I'm sure I'm going to break down and cry once it hits the climax.

People are disappointed in me, I think I actually did disappointed everyone but I really don't know what floats everyone's boat anymore. I've been secretly reading blogs and I found out that everyone seems to be giving up on perhaps me? I'm been a jerk seriously, why am I such a petty old cow. I cannot bring myself to stop being friends with a person just over such matters. Even though my mother keeps telling me that my feelings were really not worth it but I still cling on the fact that we are still able to be friends. But I think after all the incident have happen, I have learnt that I cannot let my guard down as I'll be trampled all over again and it goes back to square one when I'll be all quivered up like a prune, crying and yet grief over what has happened. Importantly, shouldn't we also set aside personal matters and work? Why bunch them all together and it makes me feel as though I owe my whole entire life to you when I scream or shouted at you that you can't even answer a mere question regarding schoolwork and do I have to give you a pound of flesh so that you would forgive me and answer my question. I'm thinking twice to even call up and apologized for making you treat me nicer in a forceful way. Gosh. Whatever floats your boat ok, if you want to stay angry longer and ignore me for the rest of your life thinking that's I never existed that's fine by me. It's not my dai zi to even care anymore because when I care, you claim I am just too possessive.

Bleh, I'm going to wiki some stuff before I head to studying Italian. I'm definitely going to fail this subject and I think Italian films are really not my cup of tea. (But I love Mafia)

Cosfest '10 / Clearing up problems and it's solutionz

2010-07-05T04:40:00.006+08:00

I'm so tired I'm so sleepy. I haven't slept for 2 days already plus I'm so busy with cosplay these 2 days that it's draining out my energy.

I'm so happy that this event is finally over and it's my 3rd time attending cosfest and all 3 times I cosplayed with Mel. I don't know what got over me to cosplay Noihime, maybe I thought I suited her more than Kaihime and Okuni. One thing I didn't really like about her was the mole, haha! I have to use my eyeliner and dot the bottom left side of my face. Overall all the hardwork of painting and more hours of painting has finally paid off and I'm very happy with my costume because I feel such a sense of accomplishment to it. Despite accidental exposed my chest in some pictures, I really think that I should cosplay more female characters which I have confident cosing at. Sorry that my boobs weren't as big as Noihime's but I tried! It was also nice to find a team of SW3 cosers and we decided to have a photoshoot together! They kindda approached me and mel asking whether we are re-cosing on day 2 but we were not. I saw them just now and they look so nice! So pretty! So now we got a Kaihime, Nene, Okuni, Aya Gozen, Hattori Hanzo! The girls we lack Inahime, Ginchiyo Tachibana and Oichi! Hahaahhahahahah.

Because Tsuyin thought maybe she could finish her Rikku Black Mage costume on Saturday so we actually came out with a last minute plan to cos together. I thought I should debut my rainbow vocaloid but if I were to walk around with her, our characters don't really match so I decided to redo my Tidus again. I hope that I managed to do him better this time round than last year but my binding was a failure today and I also exposed alot of my chest. Sigh. I made a mistake to actually decide to cosplay him because I think I'm not strong build enough to do him and I look like a skinny Tidus who is so made of fail and cannot protect Yuna. Lol. Plus I lost weight and my costume was looser than the last time I wore it. Can you believe that I would have to tackle wearing this costume for another 2 more times for photoshoot? :( I hear guys walking pass me and keep mentioning "It's a girl!", is it really shocking for a girl to cosplay Tidus? I know that I'm skinny but I can try alright! I also remade my handguard after Tsuyin confirmed with me that we are cosing on Day 2 and someone knocked into my armguard while I was on the way to put down my barang barang and it broke before I could get any cosplay pictures done!!!!ONEONEONEONE I tried to find it but I couldn't so I ended up having a weird hole on my arm. Not to mentioned that when I did Tidus last time during EOY, there was another Tidus there as well and I thought this time I decide to re-cos him again, I would be the only one but nooo, the other Tidus who was as EOY decided to do him again too. Coincidental or what? We did take a picture together but I don't have it with me. Not to mention that someone did Noihime too yesterday and I went up to her and said hello and we introduced ourselves. Weird and coincidental much?

Like seriously, what is this? I think TYH would be damn happy that people are cosplaying him by make different size boxes heads of his pico identity. LOL. Taken today at Popeyes!

I did make a good choice to turn up for the chalet BBQ even though I was so tired and hungry. Thank you so much for inviting me and I realised that I haven't paid for my share of the dinner yet. I met more people and got to know more people like Jo, Windy and also talked more to Jing, Hiyu, Saku etc. The BBQ fire couldn't start for around 2 hours despite the use of fire starters and some pyro gas thingum and by the time we started the fire it was around 10 plus already! I feel so useless that I couldn't help to BBQ the food because I was wearing contacts so I ended up not doing anything and started chatting around with people. We chatted until very late and the people who came gradually becomes lesser and decide to leave. After most people left, we decided to crash another chalet so we brought all our extra food over and we chatted and make crack jokes all the way until 3 plus! Some of them had school and I thought I have APEL meeting as well so I left and I was so tired already. It was fun and exciting and now I think I'll got back hibernating on cosplay since I'm not going to be cosing on TGX which is next week. Poor Tsuyin, still have to work on her costumes for both days.

Okay, I'm really damn tired that I need to sleep but I just have to type this out. What's adding to my sleepiness is for the amount of time that I keep crying over the same matter. I really didn't know what to do so I cried even though now that I think back it's rather dumb because I cannot get an answer just by crying. I was also confused about the thoughts that I really cannot take it anymore and I've seen what people typed on facebook which I ASSUME is referring to me. It's not that I don't appreciate you all, I have my own ways of appreciating and you just don't know. Think about it, sometimes you really can't blame someone who is very angry to reply or shout back angrily. Not all people can tolerate this though but it's about how the person and the one being angry feels and there's not way to pacify both. I found my solutions to how I'm suppose to cope with the situation from my mother who I thought was the last person I would turn to. I really could not take it no more and I was crying last night after I talked to Uriah about how stressed and clueless I was. It was a bad idea to cry so badly last night because in the morning my eyes were swollen, I nearly wanted to call up Tsuyin to tell her I cannot cos because of my eyes but bahhh, the swelling went down after awhile. I think what my mum said was logically and whatever she said was exactly how I felt. I told her and asked her if she knows any advice on how to handle such situations despite that I'm so clueless and I never felt so insane in my whole entire life. I really do think that people would treat me back the way I treat them because I myself does that. I'm so selfish to even think that other people would think like me. But then, this shows that I never put in effort to know my friends and to know whether if the way you treat them, base on their characters how would they respond to your actions. Maybe for example, I treat so-and-so very nicely, and I'll do all my best to help out with his/her work. Of course the roycelyn way is that if I helped you out this way, I'm sure you would help me out too but because it's a fair trade but it's because I thought all people are like me! So if you are helping out someone who's attitude does not appreciate your work, you can't expect them to treat you the same as you treat them because their character is not someone who appreciate the work. I finally understand and I think it's right, I expect too much upon people having to also treat me the way I treated them. It's wrong and also I should also stop talking unnecessary in case I piss people off (i.e whining)and also choose people wisely when I wish to share my problems with. Someone who would listen and not someone who is forced to listen. I thought back seriously and I regretted what I've done and I think my mum's words really struck me very strongly and I've reacting to the words she say. It's so right that I cannot no longer turn left (Heh, corny.) I really need to withstand all these because I know now that I can always rely on my mum because it's the first time I'm actually talking to her about my problems in school or whatsoever. That's why they always say that your mum is always the best! I should really get her something to thank her, she solved all the riddles to the mysteries which I was brooding and crying and unable to answer about. I also cannot believe that I even thought of committing suicide to stop thinking about what to do and also to take drugs. Seriously, I think this is the "sickness" inside of me which the fortune telling was saying (mum told me) - that I'm actually deep down rather insane especially when I'm very very very very angry and absolutely desperate. I know the next few days is going to be difficult for me but I'm sure that I'm able to pull through this because I've done it before and I should stop checking my phone for any calls or smses. See, expectancy of a call or something but nah, live with it Roy I'm sure you'll get used to the disappointment which is soon to be felt as peanuts (Y) I think I should also lock my phone away from myself like take out my sim card or something, lol. Good way of getting rid of the temptation of checking the phone. Heh.

My eyelids are dying on me already and it's already 6am! I need sleep or else I'll die. Ogays, G'Night. Finally I can actually sleep in peace as I keep crying myself to sleep for 3 days straight. Crazy shit, really.

Insignifiance, as always

2010-07-02T04:55:00.008+08:00

What did I do in my previous to deserve such misery in tolerating such people?
What have I sinned to have such people living in my life who builds and breaks trust just like that?
Why does it have to be me? Why?

Don't speak. Empty promises when you say you would. When I have news rather bad news to say, you throw me another. Why god why? Why does it have to be the victim of a person whom my significance is as puny as a micro organism that no one will ever remembers. The only thing that people remember is all the negative things I've said, what about the positive things? Is my words to you so insignificant that you forgot all about it? It happens time and time again I always end up being upset, and I never did cry until today. Because it was enough, I cannot take this anymore. Don't treat me like someone who is your god damn sparetire! I am a human being too and I have feelings too! Even all the things I've corrected you, you never listen and I told you not to treat me for granted, but you still do.You make the first mistake, don't you dare try to amend it because I will not resent to forgive. I want you to eat your own conscience and to see whether you can fucking swallow it since you make the first mistake. I do not want to forgive neither do I want to forget this because you make me so upset for the Nth time along side with other people unable to make it for such and such, I HAVE TO FUCKING GO THROUGH 2 SETBACKS WITHIN A FEW FUCKING MINUTES, I DON'T THINK I AM STRONG ENOUGH TO DO THAT.

And also, the amount of money and time wasted which I spent and I don't have to use it now pains me so. All the money which I could have put together to buy an new acoustic is gone. No matter how much I want to blame but I cannot because it's not their fault at all.

Go ahead and do whatever you want, the fact that my words WERE FORGOTTEN and my puny existence is so minor that you don't give a rat's fart about my being then we should stop doing things together since I'm only after all your "Kaki"/Companion. I'm so fucking pissed that I'm feel like biting any fucking living person's head off because I do not tolerate bastards ditching me when we planned or promised to do something together.

I'm crying myself to sleep now, praying and hoping that God would forgive my previous life sins and stop making my god damn pathetic life now even worst. Fuck

Sentimental thoughts / "Time flies like houseflies"

2010-07-01T01:27:00.005+08:00

My firefox crashed a few times before I could post this blog post up.

Seriously, I feel so useless. I can't do anything to help. I want to give it all I've got but I don't know how to and I don't want to feel as though I did not attempt to help out at all. So many things which are not within my grasp and all I could do was to sit there and wait for things to be done.

And to think back about the past, when I browsed through my phone sms which were not deleted since I gotten my phone. Since last year August, I kept all my smses which lags up my phone, hur. I missed those days when you texted me to sleep early, drink more water when I was ill. You told me that you would come and see me, call me and talk to me. You used to accompany me when I am down but you do not do that anymore because I neglected your attention. I didn't appreciate you, I treated you like dirt and I'm sorry because when I found out that you were gone it was too late. I finally understood why you left, because of my stupid selfish attitude and the way I treated you. You have to listen to all the nonsense which I put up with, I know that you must have been annoyed because now there is no one to tell to anymore. We used to be close for a few moments but then it drifts away and we have nothing to talk about now. We are like 2 ends of a magnet, we don't attract but we repel because we are too different. There is nothing I could do to savage what has been done and I never gotten a chance to tell you that I miss those times even though I treated you like that but I know who treated me well for the first time. Thank you, but sorry I don't know how to put this in words because I don't think I have the courage to tell you this real life. Maybe I'll just give you the link to this song, because it's what I really want to say to you right now.

30 June 2010
I look so kawaii nehzxzxzxzxz

2 June 2009
Some photoshoot I took last year at the museum. Kewl effects I know 8)
Today's trip to National Museum, it has been a year since we step foot there all together as a class but this time with different people. I look so cute in the photo! HAHAHAHA! Okay, I'm getting too shameless and seriously. But it was weird fun before of the new system they set up in the museum to have a tour around it with some audio headsets. It would start talking about the content of the exhibition. Cool but weird and I do not fancy carrying it around when I'm busy trying to take pictures. And compared to what Chi was wearing last year, I think he finally tone down on his gay colour shirts, because he's wearing more of white and black which is please to me eye. You savy?

I never I want to sit next to a terrorist looking idiot again in the cinema who looks like he's gonna bomb the theater which we were in. It's also embarrassing to walk out out of cinema and headed to the toilet without knowing that there's a huge chocolate chip cookie smudge on your face. Damn, I looked like I got a huge mole under my lip and it looks gross.

Look at this loser.

edward says:
real human can learn human behaviours and improve observations skill
roycelyn says:
you're like a pervert
edward says: (took out the -.- which he keeps spamming)
LOL
wth.
im not ok
its just learning about things
if im a pervert u have down syndrome
and
u mgith have
xD
roycelyn says:
wth!
edward says:
HEHE (still HEHE in caps, you pervert)
roycelyn says:
what does it have to do with down syndrome?!
edward says:
u wanna know traits of down syndrome?
roycelyn says:
what
edward says:
1- round face
flat nose
:D
k la
dun so bad
xD
alrighty im a pervert and u r normal k (i've always been normal, except that you're oblivious to it)
:D (stop using gay smiley faces, it's so gay. i'll buy you purple shirts for your bday)
roycelyn says:
.....
/aha (it's a huge 8D emoticon on msn)
edward says:
lolz
*crosses index fingers*
roycelyn says:
you said that before you cross your fingers
cheat
edward says:
LOL.
alrighty
i meant
crosses fingers like being holy. (it's not holy, it means the opposite)
u know? (besides, you cross your fingers after you said i was normal)
.. (this concludes that i'm normal and you're a pervert)

Crazy, Brilliant, Radiant, you.

2010-06-14T00:58:00.007+08:00

I'll start out with something good. Even though I'm very tired and I want to sleep badly but I shall not because there is hardly, I repeat HARDLY ever anytime to curl up in bed doing exceptionally nothing. NOTHING. I love this feeling because I can do whatever I want now and it's really godsend. I lieks.

I met Mel yesterday to get our cosfest stuff, very late I know but earlier than nothing. After cloth sourcing and all those stuff, we actually gave up on doing cosplay stuff halfway and run to shop for GSS and makan good food instead. Thats partially the reason why I would prefer to quit cosplay soon because during weekends I would be going out for movies, dinners and hang outs instead of being at home rushing all the stupid props or costume. Bleh. Just like what Jong Hyun says instead of being a star, he could be like all his friends at home watching tv and eating tangerines. Haha!

Hectic crazy last week of school with so little amount of time for me to sleep, I really hate it so much. I really hate school like seriously, and I'm so upset when I heard that holiday was only 1 week when everyone else is 2 weeks? Stupid Design, how pathetic can you be? I don't even have much time to do anything. Pissing off shit. But PcomD was kindda fun when we were assigned to work with a client and I was incharge of photographing. Finally got to borrow the lighting equipment from school as they are very anal of lending lighting equipments to courses other than MOI or VSC. They don't even want to lend me a tripod when I asked them before. That's another point why the school sucks.

Anyways, this was the set up that day and the spotlight was so strong that it lit up my whole room when I test try it at home. And the table which we were shooting our food on was super hot! Pengs swap the wet towel on the table and you can actually see the water evaporate from the table. My whole group gotten a B+ for the whole group project which was good and I'm very pleased with the grades.

Because the last block was also group work so we need to camp over at someone's house to do our project work and this time it's at Edward's house.

OH MY MOTHER, KIKI IS DAMN CUTE. DAMN CUTE DAMN CUTE. I think my Ah Pi cannot beat the cuteness of Kiki please. The only cute thing about my dog is her face and her retarded mustache fur and her long "kira" lashes. But my dog still smarter, Kiki's just too pampered. Oh and, I just realised someone's disgusting foot is in the cute picture of Kiki, wahlao.

Today was Streetfest and before that our team went down to bugis for our studio photoshoot. I don't have the photos now but they say that I can pull of empress-sama look? I love my gay long nails which gives me the whole entire empress-sama look lah; not my face because I look like some tranny according to all of them. I'm so sure that if they dump me at Changi,I'm sure some dude will stop his car and pick me up man. I'm a hot tranny which I just came back from thailand from a sex change, sawadicah! - Wtf? Okay, no. My wig is so bloody heavy because of the ponytail and it was so messy that I cannot comb the wig now. How am I suppose to re-use the wig for cosfest or maybe Bride of the Watergod like this?! Stupid centerparting character hairs, I have so many of those on my list this year which is really annoying. Did I mention that today was also my first time attempting to do a female character? I didn't expect my first female character, I would have to sew my own costume and also wear a total amount of 5 eyelashes on both top and bottom of my eye. Crazy and my eyes were literally -_- because I cannot seem to open them too huge. Don't worry, because I'm not going to do this type of "wayang" make up for my future female cosplays. Today's make up was sick crazy! Thank you photographers and helpers for coming down today and help us! Without you, we would be struggling to carry all our barang barang around and my mother for being extra and decided to join me. I really appreciate Pengs, Veron and Edward for coming down also not because to help but to also support me cause it's my first female character ~~/tranny~~ and the outfit is so chest and thigh revealing! NO ONE CAN RECOGNIZED ME BECAUSE I LOOK SO DIFFERENT AND MY FRIENDS WHOM I KNOW WOULD WALK PASS ME LIKE THEY DON'T KNOW ME KTHXBAI. I'll end off with all the camwhore photos combined into one, sorry for those I've met but did not take a picture with you because it's either I cannot find you, or I forgot. And also my nails are so long that I cannot press the shutter button, woooooooh I love being gay. 8D

Okay, time to type about some personal thoughts. My train of thoughts have been killing me since that day and I really cannot stop thinking what MIGHT actually happen. I'm afraid very afraid which makes me keep thinking until I go crazy. I start to go mentally crazy over the possible outcome and I really could not do anything to stop it! It's not within my right to stop it, I did my best and I managed to do so only once to save my poor mind from thinking absolutely so much about it until I feel like crying. It really breaks my heart to even know that I'm feeling this way and I really don't know how to kope with it. I'm so desperate to run away from the thoughts and feelings but I just can't and all I can do it to be alone and sort out my thoughts properly. I was never like this before but I don't know why suddenly it would make me change to drastically? I really don't know, I need my sanity back and I think it's time I should back off alittle so that I can control my thoughts into a much more calmer state of mind before I start all over again. Sorry, I think this emotional breakdown happened last week at home, driving me hysterical for a couple of hours which I was fidgeting in front of the computer like some dog like that. The another emotional breakdown on friday because of some news I heard and things which were once a mystery and was once answered; was suddenly brought up again. I admit I was angry, very angry indeed because of the short notice but the whole entire week of not sleeping, crazy thoughts here and there cause me to just break down and cry. I don't know how to kope with this seriously. I'll try my best since now it's the holidays and I got some break off from school and friends. Prolly need something to keep my mind off thoughts when I have Minhyuk. Minhyuk, I seriously owe you one for diverting my attention away from my mental breakdown state.

When I saw this picture, I nearly died because of his cute smile. I love guys with sooooo cute smiles! I don't care if they got small eyes or what because that's not important! I love brilliant, radiant, million dollar smile and whenever I look at it, it brightens my day. MINHYUK, YOU ARE SO CUTE. SO CUTE THAT I AM WILLING TO STARE AT YOUR CUTE SMILE FOR MORE THAN 5 MINUTES. HAHA! I'm not a pervert k.

SM =/= Sausage McMuffin

2010-05-31T03:27:00.005+08:00

Hello, Good Morning.

Serious, I am not pleased. I've had enough of the rumours on-going and I wish this whole entire shit would just stop. Simple words which I type which doesn't have a hidden meaning has chemically reacted and transform into a whole new substance for me to get mocked of. How nice. And just yesterday I was complaining about how annoyed I am about these rumours. It's fucking spreading like wild fire and my words alone are not powerful enough to put out the flame. And for those who harbor such thoughts that I'm gonna end up in a relationship with Chi Zhong Huang, your hopes will crumble down like the 911 twin towers because that is never gonna happen. Including those who secretly read my blog to snoop around for scandals, I know who you are but I'm not gonna mention, so please stop this whole entire nonsense before I have to sacrifice my friendship with him ok? Please don't let me suffer by avoiding my friend kthxbai.

And I thought this weekend was Streetfest and I rushed out my costume like some mad dog because it's actually the first time I'm sewing my own costume. It's a simple yukata but I have to figure out how to sew on different cloth for my yukata details. But Streetfest is definitely not this weekend after I confirmed with Tsuyin and I was totally disappointed. I feel bad making my mother help me with the collar because I have no idea how to sew the curve other than that, I did the nasty drafting and also the sewing. I planned ahead again because I THOUGHT this weekend was Streetfest so I can happily go watch my Nightmare on Elm Street the following week when my holidays start but noooooooo because Streetfest is not this week and I have to keep this Saturday free because there's WOF meeting which I need to attend after STARFEST. NOOOOOO, I CANNOT AFFORD TO WATCH HORROR MOVIES ON SUNDAY AND I NEED TO ALSO INFORM ALEX BEFOREHAND BECAUSE HE'S WATCHING WITH ME AND THIS TYPE OF WOOLALALA HAPPENS AND RUINS ALL MY PLANS ;_______;
(I'll think of something, I don't know what I'm gonna do yet so I will stop talking about cosplay.)

Alim, it's partially your fault for playing CN Blue in class and I had to youtube them up and fall HARDLY in love with Kang MinHyuk! He's so boyfriend material, hehe! Too cute for words, seriously. I thought I ditched the whole Korean craze already but I guess I was wrong when I laid eyes on MinHyuk, stab me someone - stab me! Yes, I love talented guys, guys who are musically inclined and MinHyuk, (sob) you play the drums for CN Blue (wipes away tears of joy)Why do you have to look so much like Lee Jun Ki and why do you have to be 184cm tall. I love you alot please! ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

I am deeply strucked by one topic which was mentioned yesterday and I keeps making me think and think again and again throughout the whole day. We have been really self-centered and because of the title he has, he has to live up to it and help everyone else and suffer silently because he has not finished his own work yet. I can't help but to think I'm partially involved as well and I feel dreadful when this topic was mentioned and also how self-centered I am towards people in regards to school work. I still need to do some soul searching on this. I'm hoping this whole entire soul searching would not lead me to become crazy because I was indeed crazy yesterday.

I thought maybe if I were to change and stop depending on people to much, it was difficult really. I have failed to suppress my anger which lasted me around 4 hours before I had to blow it up on the blackness. I am really so sorry to do that. I failed but I was also told that it is not the right way for ME to do it. Different people have different ways of releasing their anger, I don't know maybe bang on walls, tell people or just keep it to themselves. Keeping it in is definitely not me and I try my hardest to do so. Why? Because I do not want to rely on people for this and that, I want to be independent and suffer my own setbacks and pick myself up on my own without help. Is this wrong? Or is this right? I can't seem to figure it out, someone please tell which is right or wrong, please?

And not forgetting about the blackness Ang Penglin, please read up on this and you will understand what I mean when I say an SM relationship because it totally does not mean Sausage McMuffin thank you very much.

It's a small world afterall.

2010-05-20T02:52:00.003+08:00

Yes yes, I finally understood the awesome joy of blogshopping, the feeling is gooooooood and I managed to spend a total of $100 within a night and all I ever ordered was 6 shirt/dress/shirt etc. Since I can't really find time to go shopping and I'm always stuck in school with school work, I might as well just shop at home. Going out is only to eat and watch movies!

I think I finally woke up and realized how much I've changed since the last time and I was planning to blame on people for what I've become. I have became more paranoid, more hot tempered and absolutely more whiney. Where did the 2009 Roycelyn gone to? It's definitely still inside me, somewhere which I do have to do some soul searching. Where's my motivation post-it pad so I can write all my quotes to keep me sane while I try to find back my inner-self. Many said I've changed to worst and I don't really like what I'm actually hearing so I will strive to change back to what I was. But I am most positive that I would not revert myself back to how I looked like last year because I do not EVER want to be called a boy ever again in my life. Insulting to hear that on the 2nd day of school by your new classmates, ugh. I would love to be respected as a girl please, and I have all the right mind of being all girly and whiney whenever I want to. HAHA! Okay, maybe not whiney because it sure annoys the holy crap outta some people. I need to think straight and hold on to my gripzxzx, I'M MAKING A CHANGE HERE! GO ME.

By the way, I've randomly found another of my kindergarden friend. Wooh! It's lucky to actually still see your kindergarden friends around your house area if you didn't move house from one side of Singapore to the other. I moved from a Ulu North area to the Buzzing East area and I lost contact with all my kindergarden friends and the only memory of them are pictures and class photos. I wonder I can still find the rest of them or not because I would like to see how they look like after ... hmm let's say 13 years? My head used to be a shaped of a tomato, so round and rolly, I looked fat in my class photo! I hope they still recognize me since I don't think I changed that much, my face is still as round as ever! No one would believe if I told them I was underweight from pri 3 to 6, Hahah! I should get my ass back on sports again but I can't seem to commit myself once I stepped inside design school.

Oh yes, random mentions in this post because I have no idea how to lay them out nicely into a blogpost. I watched The Losers on Monday and I got tempted to buy Team Fortress 2 and play online! The movie was awesome! The sniper is so cool! Thanks Beanz for the intro, I trust your taste now. But he ought to know that Ip Man 2 is really good too, it's worth watching and sitting on the 2nd row from the screen. It happened twice with Iron man and Ip Man which I had to strain my neck as I'm only a few rows from the screen, I hope no one would fight with me for seats to watch Prince of Persia!

So I stuffed down A1 Mango smootie, butter prata, chicken cutlet, bedok famous ju kueh and fresh mango just now, I felt like I've gained 10 kg, ugh. My mother disallows me now to go on a diet because I'm really weak thanks to me falling sick one after another and antibiotics were needed to save my life or else I'll be wheezing away throughout the night. For the love of mango, I will eat more mango this weekend and stuffed myself before I tackle the last week of the block before it's holidayssssszxzxzxzxzxzxzxz. I CANNOT WAIT!

I ought be a law student, I think I still ought to be one! My resume has absolutely nothing to do with design and I'm going to fail my mock interview for internship at Furryfish. When will it be the day when I can slam the table and scream OBJECTION at the top of my lungs!? Sigh.

Edward's got Freddy vs. Jason movie! To watch or not to watch! I don't want to watch it alone at homeee! Even I would rather Jason kill me than Freddy :(

PS: I've created formspring! Since it seems like a fun widget so I decided to add it here and drop the link here over at my blog as well! If you have any question, just ask me ok? I'll uh, try my best to answer. Link: http://www.formspring.me/undramatically

I Need food. kthxbai

2010-05-16T03:31:00.004+08:00

I'm sorreh for not blogging for absolutely around 2 weeks or so because I'm so busy with school that I hear pitiful comments from people which are enough to start a charity organization. I love Wednesday, I mean the previous! It was awesome like that as we finally, yes FINALLY managed to all work together as a class.

Why as a class? Because when school started IMD peeps were split into 2 classes and both A and B classes hardly get along because we don't even talk to each other. Frankly speaking, I have no idea who was Beanz at all and most of the other people from that class. Except for Dawn LAWL. Anyways, as I was saying all of us stayed back in the IAD studio to get our ass worked on our final project which was due on Friday fyi. Since we got angry with the freshies being all so annoying downstairs and blasting stupid music like "Technology" and uh, "Only you"? How in the world can they be so freaking outdated and play Technology for at least 3 times that day and talk to loudly. Retarded people. So it was pay back time for seniors. I swear it was damn fun because we took Edwin's speakers without his permission and blasted stupid songs. Yeap, stupid as in Chinese new year songs, Majula Singapura, Mudkip etc. They even turn on the weirdest chinese songs ever heard man! That was also the night we all had KFC for dinner because we mass ordered food for everyone else. Man, it was fun! This is what we call class bonding, hurhur. I likes staying out late in school with peeps to hang out and distress with!

WIP for vpress, was still in the making just a week ago. Brain storming how the hell to make a bird cage from scratch. Managed to and it turns out so freaking .... damn rush job which I finished and tackled within a night. This week I lost so many bets that I also was not totally happy about. I lost a cup of Teh peng to the blackness and so many other random things which I cannot remember. I think I also owe veron a cup of teh peng. Ah, yes Veron woon a cup of botati! (Oh SHIT- Beanz influence in damn influencing, I'm typing and spelling like him nao.)

Pico is getting boring, and I need a life. I slept so much last night that I woke up around 16 hours later after I knock off from school. While doing my last assignment for Vpress I fell alseep trying to hold the piece of ribbon which I let the glue stick on, fell asleep on the bus unglamly next to pengs, and almost miss the damn stop. My mother just had to nag nag nag at me when I actually came home telling me to eat my medicine, drink more water, dry my hair before sleep etc. Wahlao, just let me sleep already lah. I have found other strong point of myself which is that I can sleep less that 3 hours a night and still survive on that for a few days. Let's see ... tuesday, wedneseday, thursday, friday = 24 x 4 = 96 hours. Hours spent on sleeping = 10/96. Whaddahell, that did not even hit the 1/4 mark on the hours spent. Thanks ah Elemm plus Vpress. Stupid Vpress suck money like mosquito. I'm a poor church mouse now and I realised that I was supposed to go chinatown today afternoon but I overslept so I ended up not going and ended up watching Ip Man 2 just now.

If you're wondering what time I took that picture, it was 2.55am over at my house and 3 of them are actually watching Naruto while donning in cupnoodles when submission was 9 hours away and none of them, I repeat NONE of them have actually finished their work. Okay, I got 6 people over at my house that night working our ass off the whole night doing our website and now it's up! Like finally! Wooooh! Some went home early to get changed and do more work and some stayed. Well, the ones who stayed are the ones who slept in my house.

To actually proved that I was there, I took a picture with him. I sat there for more than 45 mins trying to wake him up by all means and he just wouldn't budge! I poked his face, squashed his face, make him flare his nostrils, hit him hard with my bolster, shake him like crazy and he didn't even move! (I did many other means things to him and I even got tempted to draw his face) What the hell is this sleeping monster on my bed doing sia?! I mean, even Veron woke up after I shook her alittle, this one is just I don't know how to describe >:(
Yeah, i got angry so I tied his fringe up with my flower rubber band (apparently he didn't know) when my mother woke him up, he sat up on the bed still with the lil coconut tree on his head. HA! Because I'm still angry with you Edward Chi for playing PSK with me for my supper and making me stave all night with nothing except marie biscuits to eat and got scolded by my parents for keep treating my house as a restaurant when there's no food at home - I am considering uploading this photo to FB and tag the whole class! Because I do not tolerate PSKers I DO NOT ENTERTAIN PEOPLE WHO DITCH ME WHEN I'M HUNGRY AND CRAVING FOR SELEGIE ROCHOR TAOHUAY AND YOUTIAO AFTER MY LATE NIGHT MOVIES!!!!!!!11111111111111111ONEONEONE

My throat is beh killing me!

2010-05-02T03:09:00.008+08:00

Highly depressing picture, was not as depressing before until I noticed my freaking thighs are
much more bigger than his. Arms, Hips .. Wahlao. Eat more to make me not feel so inferior please 8(
But then I was standing in front so maybe it would look bigger... /being self-delusional
And WHATS WITH THE GAY COLOURED SHIRT, I CANNOT HELP BUT TO KEEP LAUGHING.

I think I'm falling sick again! Thanks to sombodehhhhh who coughed directly into my face when Tony Starks kissed Pepper Potts in Ironman 2. Ass, now, my throat hurts like crazy and it's all Edward Chi's fault!

Slept late yesterday and was awoken by the horrible sounding message tone and the stupid vibration just woke me up around 2pm or so! Being unable to sleep again after having to keep replying Edward then I decided to finally "wake up" and I went to watch drama! Pak-kiu is marrying Yuek-Bo! Ugh. I think he proposed to her during the part which I skipped in school because I seriously cannot tolerate their relationship. 8(

High School Musical 2 was airing and I watched for a moment before I knew I was running late to leave the house! But I ended up walking 313 ALONE because Chi was late. I could not fin the jacket I want! Where did people get their white jacket and black thin stripes from! Because I do want it badly!!

I swear I will keel people for wanting to watch movie tonight because Ironman 2 was totally soldout from the 6pm to 12am show! I was so angry!!!!!!!111111 I mean why all watch today! Yesterday it came out, why not watch yesterday! So we end up watching at SHAW instead and we sat like 3rd row from the front, the view sucks to the max prz.

Some dude, whoever you are. I hope someone would scare the holy shit outta you one day, or JUON-sama will grab your legs from under the bed while you walk pass or whatsoever. What is wrong with you?! Shouting at people's face and giving me a damn shock when I'm just innocently walking away from the cinema crowd. Don't you dare laugh at me you!!! Foolishly foolish fool! I hope you disperse! >8(

I have to queue to take a taxi to get home?! We missed the last train and we actually tapped in and sat there because the idiot said that there was still a train coming! We left when we were one of the last few on the platform. I know right, damn silly.

NOW, I WILL DRINK MORE WATER BECAUSE MY THROAT IS KILLING ME. FALLING SICK AGAIN AFTER I'M CURED FOR A FEW DAYS IS SO NOT FUN 8( I go watch my TMNT now, bb.

OHYEY. I HAS BREAK NAO.

2010-05-01T01:57:00.004+08:00

It's either she made him get off the bed because he farted,
or he was just not good enough for her.

I don't know what I'm doing. I slept less than 12 hours in 2 nights and I'm still up and awake now talking to people on MSN. I need to sleep but I'm not tired! I don't know what I'm talking on MSN either because I have absolutely no idea what is going on with the convos and yong is reminding me of the time I got drunk on some lousy booze. I know I suck ogays, don't bully me!

After submission today, I was so heypi. At least I was on the right track and PJ didn't comment much on my layout design. Ohyey. So I will be working on it soon after I take a short rest tonight and tomorrow! I gotta work on Vpress too! New assignment to be handed up on Tuesday and I got a sad news that I have 12 - 3pm class on Monday! 8(

I love watching dramas during the 3 hours break especially in school when I'm not rushing submissions, but I tend to get alittle noisy when I see Pak-kiu being all lovey-dovey with Yuek Bo because she is not pretty! Sorry gaiz, that I annoy the crap of you all by banging the table or kick random things around me. You need to understand the eyesore I see on screen!

I love my VPress group because we are LOUD and NOISY. Even if Simon doesn't like us, we are still happy about it because we have lots of fun in classz and we play gogo-plant throughout presentation! Woooh! Yey for group C for we are beh "k"ewl! 8)

You can't fight fate, but you can change fate

2010-04-26T03:54:00.006+08:00

I want a simple explaination for what I'm feeling inside.

Oh hey! Check out the awesome time which I started blogging! As usual, just done with work so I'm now blogging because today is really something which is blog-worthwhile. Was taking extreme long hours working on VPess submission on tuesday, so I finished my 2 paper dolls just now. I was literally pissed with the container because it's really small and I couldn't seem to understand how to fold it. Okay, so I managed it after trialing a few times with plain paper instead and managed to get it. Transparency is too flimsy! I also recently just found out that interim is this thursday and I have no photos taken for my imaginary hotel website I'm working on!

Why blog now? Because today's feelings was severely mumbo-jumbo due to the chronicles that happened earlier on.

I attended Nick's grandmother funeral today afternoon. He's my cousin by the way, along with Melissa his sister. Not my grandmother because it's his dad's mum. I thought I should pay my respects to her since I do know her afterall. Today was the last day, the day which she would be cremated. So after lunch at City Square, me and my mother walked over to the funeral site. Dad wanted to go but he was celebrating his birthday after, so it was rather inauspicious to attend, so he didn't go. Me and my mother sat there as I watched my uncle prepare all the necessary things before they "send" grandmama off. I went to look at her, she was really pretty, sleeping peacefully in her coffin. My uncle cut some flowers which looks like carnations which were planted by grandmama herself, she was glad that it bloomed. The flowers are to be cremated along with her. The people carried her coffin to the car as it drove slowly, playing amazing grace along the way and we walked behind in which is a way of sending her off. We walked a few distance then we boarded to bus and headed down to Mandai cremation centre(?) where we then attended the sending off prayers. I was rather pissed at that point of time because the pastor was talked about some of grandmama's relatives should consider converting to a christian like her. Hey, you want to do this, but not now ok? We are in a middle of a sending here? That's why I dislike Christians for sort-of "forcing" people to convert by telling them judgement day is coming etc. My uncle was the eldest so he gave a speech but he was stuttering as he was shaking with tears, he thanked us for taking our weekend to see grandmama for the last time before she left. After we all placed flowers in her coffin and prayed, she was then sent to be cremated. We were then brought to another room to watch as the coffin is brought to "fire room". It was sad, Aunty Anita was crying so badly and I was tearing too. We said goodbye to her one last time just before her coffin was officially cremated. It was all over.
We headed back to grandmama's house which is now empty (she lived alone) washed our hands with pomelo leaves then we could leave. I prayed that their family would stay strong and continue to live on well as I'm sure that grandmama in heaven would not want to see her children and grandchildren to be unhappy :)

Life and death is really unexpected, that is why we need to treasure it. It is indeed sad to lose someone you love so dearly just by a sudden snap of your fingers. Then, we ought to know we must pick ourselves up as soon as we fall. Rest in Peace Grandmama! We'll always remember you!

Sorry for the lengthy post! I'll try to finish up soon! After the funeral, my mum brought me to her friend's tea party at her house. It was weird, it was my first time over for a tea party and they had lots of food plus music. They were also even singing karaoke! So me and my mother rotted there for a few hours, it was fun though! The people there are mostly aged 40 and above, and d'awww, they just want to relive their young days again. They danced the cha-cha and also belly-dancing. I forced my mother to dance too! And never in my whole life did I ever heard or mentioned that my father was very good in dancing. Reaction : "WHUT?!?!"
My mother told me that and I didn't believed! (which I later asked my dad, and he didn't deny either.) There was this lady there, she was really pretty but she was tall. My mother told me that she was a transvestite. I couldn't tell! She was really pretty and I made that comment before my mum told me, how could I ever not knew because she was pretty. I bet she was prettier when she was younger and I heard she was a model. But my mum told me that she was jobless, it seems that companies are being sex-ist and they don't hire "ah guas". It was sad, because my mum said that she used to have a sugar daddy which looked after her, but he left her for another lady and now she is left all alone and being unable to find a job. This reminds me, if I ever start a petition, maybe I'll come up with "The Blue Ribbon" project! Help transvestites to find a job! Because they too are humans and it doesn't matter what sex!

So we celebrated my dad's pre-early birthday today because I have night-classes on the actual day, so we has seafood for dinner! And we also bought a chocolate cake from Rivere, yummy! The same one which Nick had for his 21st birthday last year. But too much chocolate just make me want to puke. I never had a sweet-tooth to begin with anyway so I only ate 2 slices.

Edward called me randomly which he seldom does now and told me that he was sick. That was random, the even more random thing was he said I passed my sickness to him. I did not even sit next to him or exchange more than 5 lines with him in school yet he thinks I pass him my virus? He said I love avoiding him. Haha! I would love too but I miss him now so I'll try to talk to him if opportunity strikes. I'll persuade him to buy me a pair of purple polka dot socks, I don't know how but I shall try. Because I recently played Ameba Pico and my character has those cute socks. I want to get them in rl then reila just had to mention "Ask Edward buy for you." Booz. He also told me that a lecturer in school caught H1N1? Please close TDS for the time being so I can have my holidays again please?

Signing off with the photo I took with selftimer just now. I swear SLRs are not meant for this way because I has to run next to mum for the picture. Ugh, I look ugly too. Spot my mother squshing Ah Pi's head to look at the camera and check out the awesome birthday card she made for dad (with my help too, of course! /shameless). I shall head to bed now! long day ahead tomorrow as I finish my project and head on with photographing my photos!

I feel like I type html codes like I memorised them by hard.

Setiment and righteousness, it is like a black and white situation

2010-04-18T23:57:00.005+08:00

I reckoned that the Korean craze is getting worst and worst every single day. For me, it's like my korean craze died down and then the "Korean Tsunami" started to hit Singapore. Everyone's talking about boybands, weird boybands which I didn't hear before. Girls going crazy about their korean idols. No, not only girls but boys too. SNSD this SNSD that. Please, they undergo plastic surgery ok. Not that I despise them, I just don't like Jessica. And I'm not against people who are into korean bands. It's just that, it reminds me so much of the Japanese craze which used to be here and now it's also gone too. Now who gives a f*ck about jrock like they use to? No more fangirls snatching for Neogenesis, SHOXX, Fools Mate etc. We see plenty of them rotting on the shelves of Kinokuniya. :/ Well, I hope this Korean craze will die down alitte soonish.

I seemed to have wondered into SHE's autograph signing today at Dhouby and yesterday I was about to head down to IKEA, they also had a small concert at Stadium station due to the opening of Circle line. I sat Circle line for both Saturday and Sunday already! I seems pretty normal, the train's just alittle short and I find traveling towards the Red line is very inconvenient - the last stop is Dhouby and the 2nd last stop of the other end is Bishan. The government does not know how to plan his stations well. Stations like Nicoll Highway is very redundant too.

Bought this today! Some Gashapon from Toy Closet at Plaza Sing! Mameshiba is too cute!

I accidently restarted my widget yesterday and I had to redo the layout again last night. It's back to the same together with a spanking new wallpaper! /is elated becuz it's sammul!
I love clean desktops! Don't you too? Because there is not icons for me to align and widget is good to give it the ultimate class!

Thanks to Jasmine, I can now watch E.U in school during the 3 hours ridiculous break. Thanks to the stupid unreasonable timetable I got night classes and I'm stuck with the Blackblack Pengs. (she will die bytheway.) Sammul's role as Pak-kiu is really by the book and I understand why Gen calls him Nerdy. The pissing is no him, it's the girl who is suppose to be with him. Her teeth is really distracting :/ It really breaks my heart to see Sammul and Ron fall out because Ron is going undercover and he as to break all relations with Sammul and all his other friends. Dad and Mum will watch the TV Cheena version from tomorrow onwards because I'm bring the CD to school! And I get to watch them speaking in ~~Pong Chika Pong~~ Canto!

Yes, I keep looping this song. Good songs are meant to be shared to I shall put the link here!

I does not want to head to school tomorrow, just to fart then leave the place. Not sure whether there's classes or not too. Because I'm not interested to listen to talks, all I want to do is to see the freshies then leave! Stupid school. I admit I miss school because of friends but not school work. Am sadded about Holiday has officially ended.

/runs to trap!sammul

trap!sammul is love ♥

2010-04-15T02:39:00.006+08:00

I think I've gone absolutely bonkers. I've been sick for about a week and I was all being at home, gloomy and moody as I end up doing absolutely nothing. Now I'm actually using my laptop in front of my desktop which is now playing 王老虎搶親 which has trap!sammul but it's getting really sappy through the episodes now.

Extremely weird center-parting hair, I does not lieks. But I've decided to keep my fringe long and is this the procedure which your fringe would start curling up and shows extremely ugly center-parting hair?! I don't seem to remember this happening when I used to to have long fringe. Now it's not even bangs, not even called long-fringe, it's ugly center-parting hair!!
Those who say that I look good in center-parting hair ... go and die D8
(Yoochun was just a prop for Camwhore. Sorry, have no been doing this for a long time)

Yes, I have to admit that I'm crazy and head over heels for Sammul Chan once they started showing E.U on Channel 55. At first it was like, "Ooo, Ron Ng is one of the leads for the new 9pm show" but I was wrong, Sammul was too! And I didn't watch part 1 and 2 of this series and I'm sitting in front of the TV watching part 3? It doesn't seem to link here and there, plus my dad said that it was a good show. Will watch with my dying will and I don't like the girl which Sammul is going to marry! It's not about her looks, but it's her teeth which annoys me non-stop. Dad says Sammul so handsome then his wife not pretty. Lol! Sammul is so cute please! Gen calls him the nerd :( Everyone prefers Ron! Even Jasmine! You used to like Sammul then you fly to Ron! But it's okay, the realm of handsome TVB guys they are all very handsome!

Best was .. I missed out the show 少年四大名捕 which was aired last year. I think I didn't watch it because I was busy with school and I got home late. 4 handsome TVB guys as the main lead and I didn't watch!?! Okay, so I got my butt to watch finish the drama these few days and I have to say Sammul is so cute! Ron didn't speak much though, and Kenneth's on-screen relationship with Selena is really good. Hands down to Mr Lam being able to act the whole entire role on a wheelchair. I salute you! I actually got quite pissed with Sammul's character at one point of the drama, he caused the girl to get kidnapped and raped. Because he render that he was a Play-boy and if a girl is interested in him, he would play her out? But his character is really humorous and he adds alittle salt to the seriousness of the drama.

Screencapped this because Sammul was being a dork while guarding the Constable Unit from the protesters! Too cute I swear! I never knew hallucination would be so humorous if ever said out aloud. Thinking about woman surrounding and serving you during work is just ... plain lecherous. D8<

Ron decided to have himself invisible when they take a group candid shot?! No, maybe he went to emo somewhere. (Why am I always so biased towards Ron? Hur. Too bad, Mr Ng) I should be the one emoing about their age right? They look so young but yet old in real life. How can all of them hit the big 30 already! :( It's okay, they are good to look at, I happy already! /burst into extreme fangirling @ picture.

Veron, I will prove to you that I met Raymond before when I went back to HK that time! I don't remember which year but he was invited for some fans meeting outside this CD shop at Sai Yeung Choi Street there and I saw him, I did! I'm not lying and I will find the proof to show that I was not hallucinating that I saw him! /searches blogspot archives like mad.
I did not dream that I saw Raymond ok! If this time I head back to HK and see Sammul or Ron, I let you know. This time I take picture with them, that should be better proof! I will sharpen my stalking skills! Hurhurhur. (But meeting Raymond is fate ya'know? /brags)

As I was mentioning that I was watching 王老虎搶親 because Sammul is crossdressing this this series and trap!sammul is absolutely extremely pretty as a female! Except he looks alittle overgrown due to his manly-built but still pretty! Manry Sammul became a trap :( but for comic-relief I would watch the show! It's quite good so far but Sammul's going through a hard time in the drama (for now.) Shall watch finish and head to bed. Finally going out tomorrow! My mother is not happy that I was stuck at home for days so I'm heading out for Meesua and Sambal Stingray tomorrow. But still, I'm missing white pepper crab! Crab noodles would do too! ♥

Inorite, damn pretty. It's been so long since I've obsessed with a star (after which I stopped hearing korean music), I miss the feeling and I'm getting it back again. OHYAY TVB HANDSOME GAIZ. <8D

Oh erm, I was thinking about how people can't communicate well when interest clashes. I think it's true because I don't think I'll be able to take side on what one's obsessed with especially if I dislike it so. People say that the opposite attract, I beg to differ :/

踊る踊る眠らせてと踊る止まぬ涙

2010-04-08T00:53:00.005+08:00

Nothing to blog about since it's the same ol'thing everyday. Been sick so I never left home, and there's nothing to do at home and I'm bored. I like staying away from the computer, the further the better!

I'm possibly back to jrock, somehow and somewhat. I'm sharing this song even though it's been released so long ago. I didn't know the translated meaning until I downloaded the pv for my ipod. I was indeed touched by it. Ruki, this is one of your sentimental pieces isn't it?
I won't call the pv creepy because I think it's artistic, I love the ballerina's dress. It's so poofy! I somehow think that the title isn't that appropriate for the song. Even though the song is about a girl which Ruki dreams about but I see it as something else. More like a trapped being unable to wake up? Probably someone to be wedded? Like Ruki's fiancee is under coma and unable to wake up and I don't see how to join the dots with the word distress. Lol.

Translated lyrics :

Until your distress sleeps…
Fill me up with your grief

Hello…dear my bride.
What is it that you're looking at?
Not even butterflies that have fallen to the floor can be gathered up in those eyes.

What I want to forget is that too-white suffering.
The wound that convinces you I believe in you won't die away.

Dance, dance, when I'm allowed to sleep I dance.
These unrelenting tears...
Killing my voice in these hands that shake weakly, I drop my lips down to you.

Hello…dear my bride.
Your footsteps are scorched.
Somehow, it must be necessary that they’re already becoming a ringing in my ears.

The breath I let out without thinking runs across my skin.
On a restrained, swaying sword, your smile...
What I want to forget is that too-white suffering.
The wound that convinces you I believe in you won't die away.

In my emaciated dreams, this moment I can't wake up from is reflected.
God, even sadness...
If you will answer that you’re genuine, then I don't mind getting hurt.

Don't forget it, that I was captivated by you who knows pain.

Right here, goodnight.

Dance, dance, until I'm able to sleep I dance.
These unrelenting tears...
Every time I close my heart off when there's nothing left, when it feels like I'll wither away…
In my emaciated dreams, I sing “one more time”.
God, even sadness...
If you will answer that this is you, yourself, then I don't mind getting hurt.

In these dreams that should end, our goodbye is blooming.

Fuzzy Llama, Funny Llama, Llama Llama duck!

2010-04-04T03:08:00.004+08:00

Sob. Someone please please please please save my from my agonizing sore throat! It's been on since a few days ago and it make drinking and eating very much a difficulty. Help me please! Not to mention that most brain eating headaches then hit me twice within a day! 4 tablets of act-fast panadol was not enough to ease the pain instantly!

I think it's gotten worst because I was shouting alot when I was playing L4D just now and I keep shouting for them to follow here and there. Horrible when we played that stupid stage more than 6 rounds and we always cannot pass. Ya'know the stage when they have to fill the car gas tank, it was damn pissing off! More than 6 time! Me, Verse, Shermain Jie and Clement was like WTFFFFFFFFFFF STUPID TANK LIKERDAKJDHKASLASDA .... D: We managed to finish that round before I left for home. I was suppose to be home earlier because I'm sick and I ended up leaving at 2am. Cause we celebrated Maomao's birthday when we brought cake for her. First time experiencing a cutting cake session in a LAN shop, Lol.

Firstly, I'm not going to rant now because I'm coughing as though my liver is at the tip of my throat for every sentence I type. My wigs, which I ordered 5 months ago is not even here! What in humanity is this?! I really hate irresponsible Cheena people because they always say that they post out the wigs, give the EMS shipping code which is wrong. Even if it was wrong, if she posted it out correctly, the package would still arrive to Singapore safety. But but but 5 months and no news so I would really want to get my refund back. Worst, today I messaged Vic about the wigs and she never reply me! My patience is really at it's limit already, I'm not going to wait and I'm not going to tolerate such a middle person because it's her duty to get the wigs sent it over here. I paid for the wigs and I'm sure I gave her some handling fees too! And no wig for 5 months? My shoot is postponed for like so many times and I'm getting very pissed off with her and the supplier as well. The wigs are not cheap either. Okay, I think I'm asking for refund and she should pay me back, so what? Then she can slowly go ask Kucos for the refund when I get my money back and order on my own this time. Seriously, I'm not going to flame on the forums or whatsoever, because I do not want people to know about this matter I mean afterall me and Vic are still friends, yeah?

I can't sleep because my hair is wet, and the hair dryer in my parents room. So I'm doing ridiculous things now as in posting the Llama song which Tsuyin got me really addicted! It gets annoying after awhile but it's damn cute!

Yes, the original song goes on and on by loop. Damn, I should have put this song for my MMess sound loop exercise! That would so totally kill Elvis and he would bang his head on the wall!

My name is Samon, first name Suzie.

2010-03-30T23:02:00.005+08:00

I'm really sorry, I just can't help it but to photoshop the picture. it's too hilarious to be ignored! I don't know why it becomes so blur when I exported it from Ai, and it looks so beyond-hope! About 30 mins of hard work trying not to laugh at it. (I exaggerated the time taken, alittle) I'm very proud of my work here, don't you think so?

I watched The Lovely Bones today, it was draggy and I didn't really like it that much maybe because I didn't read the book finish (except for the first paragraph which was one of my literature text) and the initial plot on my mind was different from what it was actually. Thankfully that it was not so explicit as they cut them away. It's really unlucky to be raped then killed and placed into a safe. The sick pedo should just be brought to justice instead of dying in the book and movie. I disapproves how the book was so detailed about the whole "rape" part. This teaches you not to follow old beibeis to the shaft beneath the ground as you very much have just dug your own grave.

Neo Genesis isn't selling as fast as hot cakes anymore ): I used to remember how it was snatched around, playing the first-come-first-serve game with all the fans especially if their favourite jrock artists is on the cover. Oops, I am one but I stopped though. I can't afford to keep all the magazines at home, I have plenty actually and I don't know what to do with it. I can't bear to sell it, neither bear to throw it away ... so it's collecting dust in my drawers! I mean, it's now antique right? I has the 2006 issues! HAHAHA! /still has no idea what to do with it.

Anyways, I saw the Neo Genesis which was on sale today is the one with Tora and Shou Vampy photoshoot on the cover along with Uruha and Aoi's photoshoot on the back cover. The Vampire shoot was awesome as I saw the scans before and I downloaded it just for fun. Keeping it for future graphical use ... it might also be used as an assignment or something. I used one of Uruha's picture for one of my typo assignment and Jeff kept it :x I was thinking how much Tora would have fitted to be Edward Cullen better than that caterpillar eyebrows Pattinson who fails so much as Edward Cullen (I nearly typed Chillen, wtf.) He's got the features of a Vampire and I would rather see him on screen. Shou can't really be a vampire, but he fits roles like Ciel Phantomhive much more, maybe because the eyepatch? He also got this baby face but I doubt he's a demanding type. Lol. Uruha could also be a vampy too, recalling one of the old shoots back in 2007? or was it 2006? The only one magazine which I fought with several other people to get it!! I snatched the last 3 of it and the girl who was about take it just blankly stared me, turned around and bitched about me. I know, I know .. I'm awesome right? :D He looks superb in that one and also he makes a pretty little vampire don't you think?

Huzzzzzahhhhhh, imagine Tora all sparkly. Gross, but way better than the certain someone. and Robert Patinsson, if you so miserably saw this blogspot of mine, don't cry ok? To add more salt into your dipdip wound, I would love you to be overthrone your character in the Twilight series along with your miserable emo-bella Kristen Swert(sp?) and replace you with someone else. You know I never hated Edward's character itself until you were casted as him. :) You're a BIC BOI now, you don't wear diapers, don't go to the corner and weep; just accept that no one likes you. No one is gonna watch your new movie "Remember Me", remember, I'm always part of your misery. :)

Reading MAD is starting to become an obsession, bought my 3rd copy today. My mother isn't going to be happy as I'm starting to collect this zine.

I is beh beriberi hungry naozxzxz.

2010-03-24T00:57:00.007+08:00

First time at TWG today for high tea! It really does feel flattering to be having high tea there! It just feels like those rich taitais which would go for afternoon tea with their friends
Their list of teas which they have come in varieties of more than 400 different types! I couldn't decided so we decided to ask the waiter who was working there. It seems like they only hire waiters which are all from different countries? The one that served us seemed to be the from British and half the time I couldn't hear what he was saying. He seems to be murmuring most of the time but he recommend me Golden Rose Tea and it was good! The one that FQ gotten was also nice! It was Black Tea, and I was expecting it to be black in colour but it was not.

This is what we ordered, it was a set meal for the high tea period which is from 3pm to 6pm.
The food was good! And I'm definitely heading over there for high tea again! The macroons is way better than the last macroons which I bought from this shop which was all pink coloured in 313 Orchard. The brown one was awesome! It was Earl Grey with Chocolate! Yum! We had scones too which I spread cream cheese and tea jelly jam on it!

I look so unflattering in pictures, help! Actually, I don't look good in pictures. I think in every picture of me, just crop off my head. I can't stand looking at my face either. Lol.

Oh, I think I ought to talk about the waiter a little more. It was super embarrassing! He was about to serve me my plate of sandwiches and he wanted to put the plate in front of me. And I had to help him by lending a helping hand to put my own plate in front of myself, it seems like a short tug-o-war with him because he refuses to let me place my own plate in front of me! (more like he insist that he served me like a princess. Lol) I don't even dare to have eye contact with him after that incident, it was definitely way too embarrassing to! Then me and FQ headed to city hall thinking that Ben's and Jerry's was still there but it wasn't! So we made a trip back to Dhouby Ghaut but the queue for the free cone day was extremely long so we decided not to queue. I mean, the queue was from the 3rd floor all the way till the 4th! There are even people going for double rounds! Talk about kiasu.

My post on the time I met Raymond Lam in HK seems to be missing and I was browsing through my blogger archives for it but no avail. Veron said that I dreamt that I met Raymond Lam and it was all made up but it's not! I did see him! And I did blog about it too! But I can't seem to remember which was the year that I went back and saw him because it was definitely not last year. Will source for it again, and let there be love for Raymond Lam! 8D
While browsing through my archives, i really read up lots of old blog posts which were really, let's say ridiculous. This blog was on going since the year 2004 when I started out as a secondary school student. This is donkey years already and I still managed to keep my blog on-going until now. (except that I dread blogging alot. Lazy, you see?) One of the entries in the year 2006, I wrote about how miserable I was when I was unreasonably chosen as the canteen monitor when I was not even in class. That sucked and I emo-ed throughout the whole entire blog post. I like the good ol'memories.
I never knew, how much of a habit it was to type "8D" in all of my posts since 2007. EIGHTTTTTTTTTT DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

All that Glitters is Gold. I'm addicted to Pucca, because Garu has the most cutest expressions ever.
Amen to that.

The man in the Blue suit, the man in the Pink suit.

2010-03-20T23:49:00.004+08:00

I don't know what made me clicked Dreamweaver and yet did some stupid codings to piece my new blogskin all together. I must be sick in the brain to do work when yesterday marks the last day of school; the last day of a whole year in poly.

Frankly I slept at 4am because I was playing the last case of GK. The case is so long! I think it can be compared to T&T's last case, but that one was tear-shaking because of godot. The last case of GK took me around more than 8 hours to complete it, and I hate Quecus(sp?) Alba, stop interrupting with your horrible sounding "Objection" because it simply sounds as horrible asCalisto/Shih-na's. Oldbag was also getting to my nerves when she keeps talking non-stop about Edgeworth, I wonder why haven't Franziska whipped her to death. Oh! Franziska called Edgeworth "My cute little subordinate" Lol. I actually ever wondered if she would ever end up with Edgeworth! From what I pictured, Edgey would be cooking up dinner in the kitchen with a pink frilly apron, and he didn't serve dinner on time, Franziska would whip the crap out of him, worst if they got a little kid : Edgeworth von Karma Jr! Ha! That would be interesting. I mean, even Phoenix has a "daughter" Trucy.

After I finished the case last night, I seemed to have this repetitive nightmare and I keep waking up every hour. I seems to be related to the game but it was far more scarier that the stupid blue badger. I couldn't sleep properly until around 7am or so. I have recently turned on the nightlights on while sleeping thanks to the that stupid Darkness who was watching "Phobia 2" in school. I'm actually not afraid of the zombies, but the scene just keeps repeating in my mind and I got quite grossed by the whole zombie apocalypse. (is also reading too much zombie related stories these days too) Nightlight is on not because it would ward off zombies, but it's actually for me see zombies so I can escape my room pronto without losing my way through the darkness. Silly I know, but this is what happen when a damsel is totally in distress. Lol.

"The man in the Blue suit, and the man in the Pink suit."
They ought to be featured in the next upcoming GK game (if there is ever).
Also watch this if you please : Gyakuten Kenji TGS promo
I mean whut, they are debating who is the next main character before the release of GK. And Phoenix is the Blue Badger! (I simply hate the wriggling dance)

DO WHAT YOU CAUSE A PIRATE IS FREE. YOU ARE A PIRATE

2010-03-11T23:17:00.015+08:00

I've finally crawled out from my work environment and I closed all my working applications on my comp, like finally. I was working throughout the whole day, finally got all my pages done but not fully done yet thanks to the aching migraine I'm suffering from now.

Sebastian was staring in front of me ever since I placed him there. He was prying at me for not taking his pictures and I surrendered to him today. Because yesterday I played with his furwig and styled it differently so I thought he looked rather refreshing. But just now I changed his wig to Hayden's platinum blonde fur wig. Can you believe it? My Taeyang wears Bape and I wear cheap clothes which can be bought from Bugis Village at cheap cheap prices. This isn't fair D: Sebastian is reckoned the hardest doll to photograph as I can't get him to look at the camera and I don't really know how to pose him. He better be happy because I decided to give him the sunglasses which I got from Dollmore to him because it's for my darling Hayden, but he's head is too small and it keeps slipping off. I wanted to snap a pic of him in sunglasses when my SLR started screaming that I need to charge my battery pack. Ugh. I need to get it back from Reila soon!

My drama has came to an end just today, it was stupid. And I was practically wanting to karate chop my Plasma Television because of the foolishly foolish plot they writtened for the last episode. First things first, MY TINGXUAN DIED. I cried twice thanks to episode 23 and 24. Yes, he died because of the lack of blood and they didn't save him in the nick of time. Why why why why?! I mean, it's really not fair to him! He just cured from his diabetes and just had a chance to live his life finally and he just had to get stabbed and die. What in humanity is this?! He didn't even gotten a chance to fight with Zhiyuan for Shengxue's favoritism! The script sucks, totally sucks. Shengxue should have not married Zhiyuan in the last episode anyways, I mean she should vow never to marry again. They drama keep emphasizing that Zhiyuan and her have awesome romantic moments together before Zhiyuan betrayed her and brought down the smuggling fort but I don't see it as appealing to those she and Tingxuan had! You can actually see Tingxuan and Shengxue's relationship progress along the show and whenever Shengxue sees Zhiyuan, they just glace over each other - thats all. I don't believe you expect me to see chemistry and invisible sparks fly because I still don't see how deeply in love they are just by showing emphasis. I'm typing in a very biased POV, because I cannot see the justice for Tingxuan afterall. Anyways, it's over. No more 8pm drama unless it's another costume drama then I'll consider watching.

15 mins rough ugly sketch of Pico-chan (the actual nico nico singer, not my chao ah gua.) I'm sorry I don't do justice to you Pico-sama! You can't even see the sketch line please, because everything he wore was black, including his hair. So this how Pico would look like in my "Chao Ah Gua" drawing style. And Imma lazy to draw Sekihan as well. My Chao Ah Aua should initially look like him from what I watched their Magnet live, I just stole his name for my stupid biscuit product. /runs
Thanks to Pico, I'm addicted to Love is War! Even though he sang it so high that it sounded way much like a woman. Besides, I think he's quite cute looking loh. :D (Tsuyin says he looks like those typical emo boy :C) But I do not not not not not not ship boy love okay, they're plainly just hugging because of the song!

Click here for crack :Do what you want cos a pirate is free.

Nothing box and it's nothingness.

2010-03-09T00:50:00.006+08:00

Watch if you please, because it's sad but true.
Talking about the difference between male and female brains. Why can't we woman have a "Nothing box" too?

Hello my dearest earthlings, awesome here blogging. :)
I escaped away from work just a moment ago because I'm totally not in the mood to pull out the tablet and draw. Not in the mood to design my stupid layout because I think I'm starting to extremely hate the looks of my "CHAO AH GUA". I will NOT savor the last 2 weeks of school which I dread so much.

I wasted time today just by heading to school. Yes, there was class today from 12-3pm for DH&C, the most foolishly foolish module ever. But I learn pretty much some stuff about genders and also the way of the human brains. Learning about design and how it evolve is not something which I would want to touch on. I opened my laptop and pretended to be using it throughout the whole lecture and video time when I was actually hiding my DS behind it and playing Gyakuten Kenji! Jai didn't even suspect a thing! Maybe he was just too engrossed with the video that he didn't know. I mean there were other peeps in class using their laptops as well! What an ingenious idea you have here Roy. Since it's so successful, shall try this method again in class!Oh and, my laptop is the same colour as my DS! :)

If you're going to mention about my blogger head is too yellow, go ahead ok? There is something wrong with laptop colour, I see it as perfectly fine but on my other comp it's totally like uhh, OH SH- ... My craze for Kimi ni Todoke was mad that I chiong the anime and also the manga because I really wanted to see Sawako confess to Kazehaya. Aww! It just ended so sudden and the translation didn't finish translating the next chapter. I'm on cliff-hanger now! I'm not going to be an ass and say that Sawako reminds me of myself, because I'm not like Sawako at all. So I'm not going to blog about how Kimi ni Todoke being similar to my life because there is not "Kazehaya" in my life yet. Well there is Pin though - some people might know who

I baked! I baked! Again. I should really stop trying to bake cheese related products because it's not only fattening but I always have so much extras that I have no idea what to do with it! It's a waste to throw it away also. This time was Oreo Cheesecupcake and I'm not going to do this recipe again. I actually taste good but the outlook of it is super ugly and thanks to the oreo blend in, it looks really lumpy. Okay, I'm not going to scare you but it's nice to eat ok! I don't know why all my baking they lack the looks but not the taste. But like what Joanne said, it's better than it looking good and taste like crap! I'll consider the choco pudding again when holiday comes, I don't even know how I managed to cram baking time into my tight school schedule!

One more picture before I sign off, because I know that I'm going to blog again tomorrow so I shall stop typing rubbish on my blog before it gets all flooded. Now now Oldbag, keep your disgusting wrinkly hands off my Edgeworth or I'll peel your Pink Badger costume into bits and pieces! Don't you just love playing Gyakuten Kenji when you just play as the lovable Edgeworth!

OHAI, MY LOGIC AND PART OF MY ASSIGNMENT FOR MY DH&C ASSIGNMENT. I KNOW YOU GAIZ WILL SO AGREE WITH ME ON THIS, RITE? 8D
Basically from what I observed, I have come to a conclusion that Men and Women are like the two ends of the Magnet – positive and negative. Not only does the outlook appearance or anything related to their biotic origins, but the character and the nature of both man and woman are totally different. And that is why both Male and Female are attracted to each other like how unlike poles of the magnet draws together. If both Male and Female are of the same side of the Magnet pole, human life would be so much different and “Love” would probably not exist between this two sex.

Males are of the more dominant sex as compared than female, it’s stereo-typical but true. However, not all the time the ingénue are the damsels in distress, because in society now it begs to differ.

... Roy, just prepare to face the worst of Jai already.

Did you get my sign, sign?

2010-03-03T02:51:00.012+08:00

It's a quarter after one, I'm alone and I need you now.

It's been some time since I last blogged! Been really lazy and quite busy amongst things these days. School and fun all bunched up together from the last time I updated till now.

Yes, I'm still awake now because I just finished my second layout for my MMeSS web layout and I have the Interim submission on Thursday. I'm one layout away from done. But seriously, I never liked HTML and I have to tackle it now. I know bits and pieces here and there until today I was literally wanting to kill people in class because Frames was driving me nuts! Elvis was mentioned FLAMES - O THE FLAMES and half the time I was trying to resolve the little problem here and there which was not even worth mentioning. Just about to upload on the FTP server I overwrite my file and I had to redo everything from scratch again. No worries, it was quite fast! So I uploaded it after donkey and nonkey of ages later thanks to the school's lousy internet speed. Because of that, I couldn't connect and play Corpse Craft with the rest because mine was lagging like crap.

Here I am munching on fruity pebbles as I typed this.

Maybe that's the reason why my mascot for my web layout looks like a "Chao Ah Gua".

Maybe because of that, my love for Mile Edgeworth is all growing again.

It's also definitely the reason why Veron called me Ah Gua recently.

Yes, I love men with frills.
I'm kidding when I mentioned the last sentence, because men with frills doesn't apply to guys in real life.
It would make them exceptionally unwanted by females.

So last week most of us headed down to Sentosa beach! I got this tan AGAIN. Stupid resident asshole mentioned that I had a bra strap tan mark, and stop touching me ohmygod. You complained that I was touchy last time, now you are the touchy one! Plus there is this very pungent strong smell coming from him, not that it's smelly it actually smells nice but it's really strong. Standing next to him I whiff up the smell which could cause me a migrane in a jiffy. (Oh yes, Newsflash : I played Bioshock2 and I suffered hours of migraing after cramming it for 30mins.) Stupid, thanks for being mean and not wanting to lend me your jacket you cow! Poor Roy was shivering under the aircon! And you were wearing a shirt!
Okay, back to last week! So I went swimming and nearly drown thanks to Yong who was out there to kill me. Lol. Next time, it'll be swimming in a swimming pool! Sea water taste extremely gross and imagine that being inside your nose and mouth at the same time. It was also not my intention to get all wet but those 2 idiots (sorry pengs, I'm scolding you again here. Along side with resident asshole edward ok?) threw me into the sea! Next time when you all head over my house for swimming, I'll personally kick both of you into the pool! :D:D:D O, do I hear sweet revenge calling out to me?

Saturday was catching up with Dorrie buddies! I need to attend a doll meet soonish! I miss playing with my dolls very much. No time to buy new clothes for them! No time to take photos for them! There were so many photoshoots I had in mind but I just couldn't execute. Anyways, thank you Steph who is going to be the one planning one for us! Time to let Hayden and Dahlia see the sunlight for a while but poor Ian and Jeremiah. :(

I seriously am missing a lot of people now. You know, this rarely happens to me because usually I get to see all the people for catching up at least once a month. But I'm terribly missing someone right now. It's been such a long time since we had a nice chat, eat awesome food and all. The last time we met was do something which is Lol, for him. Will try to catch up once school's out for me!

Dear Lord, I pray that you make the next 15 days not to be a hassle, let it pass quickly as I finish up Design History and Culture and MMeSS.Oh oh, And I changed my password for some of my accounts to a 21 letter word! It's so long that all of the system says that it's a strong password! Lol. /is proud of self

IS BE BORED.

2010-02-24T23:57:00.007+08:00

Just now I tried the whole webcam system, I look as white as Bai-Jingjing, I likes! :D
I'm not actually very white as compared to other girls (even guys) But in actual fact, I actually want to be quite tan, can you believe it? I mean, most girls would want to be as white as lol, snow. However, I do not want to be as burnt as Ang Penglin! That one, the colour code on photoshop eyedropper tool should be "#000000"

I'm actually quite shock that time passes really slowly these days and I can't help but to think it's already 2am when the clock just stroke 12am. How nice. I have absolute no entertainment (even though I borrowed a DVD from school today) as for now so I am blogging. This is a stupid excuse to kill time. I shall not complain that I'm bored, because this feeling now is really godsend! I mean, when have I ever complained in my previous posts that I am bored?!

Tomorrow I shall slack at home, because school is nice and decided to give us some time to do our assignments at home. Long weekend, I like it! And I have chosen the person whom I will be observing for my assignment for Design History and Culture! Guess guess! Heee. This whole assignment is like a total pervert kind of thing, I mean they want us to sit there and stare at the person and observe them then make guesses on what they like and stuff. Okay, I'm going to observe pretty boy Ryden! I'll just pretend that I don't know his name and crap some stuff up about him. Actually frankly, I do not know him that well except he's a nice guy and he's labelled as pretty boy (to me lah). The only words that we exchanged is me saying "Oooo, youa re very pretty!" Super pretty to the max when he wore eyeliner and has the prettiest sharp nose which all girls would want! Since I won't be going to school, so I can't see him .. I shall see his facebook and observe him. THIS IS SO TOTALLY STALKERISH. I DO NOT DO THIS ALL THE TIME FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. I know most of the time I am not sane, but this whole assignment thing is just grossing me out.

It's also not fun to see people going home when you're just alighting the bus to head to school. The other schools are all having their exams and I'm pretty sure that some of them are over and done with it! Whereas we design people still head to school as per-normal and they are going to stave us by closing all the canteens except Mensa and Engine school canteens. Are they trying to kill us? I mean, Engine school food is in edible which would cause diarrhea for the rest of the week and you can kiss toilet bowl 24/7 for all we know. Mensa wouldn't kill but recently Veron ate there and her plate of Zi-Cha has a worm in it! It's okay roy, it's okay. I think you can always happily go on a diet for this whole month in school which would help you alittle with losing weight.

Okay, I needs some time off typing. Besides, i have no idea what to blog about either. Oh, I want to play Bioshock 2, and Kazehaya is my dream boyfriend which I would want. The looks, the personality, all I wants STOP

L O V E is just another word I'll never learn to pronounce.

2010-02-23T01:14:00.006+08:00

Ohai thar. Today I have not done any work, not intending to anyways. Didn't even bother to check my email for the updates and also I did a photoshoot today. School is really boring crap, why is it the two most boring modules glued together this block? How on earth am I suppose to survive this block observing human nature and also creating a webpage when I can't even do on chocolates! No hard done but, my MMeSS lecturer looks like a little boy! Hmm, we are all do dead even for the start of the block! One more month then I will shout that I survive a year in TP with all those hardships and sleepless nights. Sweet.

Okay, my shoot is really incomplete because my camera battery went flat and my charger is not with me. I was in the mood for bokeh pictures but my intention was to get a studio shoot done for Hayden and Dahlia. White background = cannot play with Bokeh. Whateverzxzxz. Hayden and Ian's birthday just passed in an blink of an eye during P1 and haven't gotten a time to get any thing for them. I'm such a bad owner, seriously. This shoot is a sad one, unfortunately. It's somewhat like a breakup between couples, not that I meant anything - I do not want couples that are so "dip dip" in love to break up but I'm trying this shoot with a sad theme (my first too!). This has a very deep meaning to it, and I called this shoot "Chemistry" Incomplete, so here's what the progress I have so far. When I'm done, I'll post it on Livejournal! Yes, for those who read my blog I think you guys should have known that I'm the sore thumb that sticks out of the other janes because I play with dolls with the height of around 65cm or so. So fear me! :'D

Other comments on this is that Hayden is always so grumpy-looking. And it's very easy to portray Dahlia in a sad mood but I'm quite annoyed by her eyes, too small. Maybe I should send her to mod her eyes open alittle. I also hate Dahlia's double joints because it's was giving me difficulties to pose both of them holding hands.
First time having a casual shoot, so no suits and frilly dresses for both of them. I just threw all the most casual clothes I have for them! Dahlia has no casual clothes! Poor girl. Oh and, my next try - Dahlia standing on one leg. Hehheh!

The perfect scent

2010-02-20T01:41:00.003+08:00

Okay, maybe the previous post came out pretty harsh and I feel kindda sore about posting it up. I guess it was a big mistake, I mean, this blog is on public and anyone can read it. I think now that I have cooled down alittle, I don't feel so hot-headed already and I'm pretty much relaxed.

Today officially marks the end of P1 which applies to all my classmates because some had their presentation today. So it's Byebye P1 and hello to a whole new block next week - for another month then we are officially through with freshmen year! But I do not anticipate P2, P3 and P4 as I'm sure it's also going to be a killer.

I've been really unlucky these days, firstly some dude tried to make small talk to me at the bus stop which I boarded 15. He asked the dumbest question asking what school was that when the big name "Tao Nan School" was clearly plastered right before his face. I didn't know he was talking me cause I had my earphones on, so he waved to make it look more obvious that he was talking. Thank you 15 for coming in the nick of time or else I do not know how to avoid talking to him. Then when I reached school, while one way up the stairs to cross over to TP, the wind was strong and my skirt, flew up. Heh. I'm sure those people at the lowerside of the staircase must have an eyeful. I walked away quickly as possible to class for presentation.
Then silly me, just before I had lunch I wanted to wash my hands. I have no freaking idea why the tray smells of ... uhh, I can't describe it but it was smelly. So I went to the toilet to wash my hands and gussy up alittle. Just when I just left the toilet a man walked into the toilet and several women came out from the next entrance! I asked the lady wasn't it the female toilet which I just exited, she told me no that was the gents. What the freak?! I went into the gents without realising until I came out! Second time this happened! I was so embarrassed that I ran all the way back to the restaurant! Seriously, what is wrong with me?!

I watched Perfume just now, like finally after a year. Couldn't find any hosting site that would play my movie without hiccups. I turned out alright, except you need a very mature mind because there are obscenities. Before anyone shouts that I'm watching porn, shut up ok? He boiled women, smelled them and there was a mass uhhh. nevermind. So we can get woman scent when we kill them, apply animal fats on them then wrap them with cloth?! Later distillate the animal fat residue which were scraped off the woman body to produce essences?! I don't know whether the method works or not but best not to try - it seems to be like some sick amusement kind of thing for anyone in this century to do it! But the way we see it, one whiff of the perfume, it would turn everyone into something which only love can be over powered and with that, I shall shan't elaborate. Cough

I shall sleep now, woke up very early for facial - we gotta self-pamper alittle at the end of the block and I also gotten to dye my hair! I was so tired that I fell asleep while the hot oven thing was over my head and I nearly burnt my hair because I sort of drooped my head towards the sides. Hurrrrrr.

I shall indulge in mocha soon, the mentioned of whether I wanted cappuccino reminds me of the good ol'days of coffee bean and it's wonders to keep me awake!

You are just !@#$%^&(&^%$#@!

2010-02-18T00:00:00.010+08:00

As quoted from my Livejournal locked post.
I will prove to you that I am strong, I will prove to you that I do not need you to bond me and them together.
I do not need you to make me don't feel left out. You are not my everything, I can survive on my own.
Even though it takes time, because time heals all wounds.

You get irritated when I try to understand you, but you always get me wrong.
You stereotype people, you think everyone is how you always think they are.
You choose this way to end it, you choose this way to end our friendship. I don't blame you and I will respect your decision.
You chose this, and this is one of the steps upon achieving you goal, I won't stop you. Because you always think about yourself and only you.
You yak and say that I was self-centered, you do not understand how I feel. You cheated my feelings as always, you refuse to tell me whether you truly treat me as your true friend. All this time I was just a tool, your stupid play thing, why do I even bother to care about you when you treat me like this?

You told me not to believe, but I believed you. So it's my fault? I believe in mutual trust among friends and you tell me that I am dumb to believe in that? You say that I am stupid, I do not understand. I would not understand if you do not explain to me. No one is as smart as you to play mind games.
And since it was the last time for us as great friends, i told you how I felt, how i missed you always, miss you just being there and i told you the whole truth. All I get as a response was "Maybe someday I will tell you the truth."
There will be no someday, because I have decided that we should just be acquaintances, you lead you desired life and I lead mine.
I will strive to fit in no matter what, even if I can't I'll find myself new friends which I can believe and trust.

Thank you for being just there, thank you for being you, thank you for the late night sessions, thank you for accompanying me for night movies, thank you for listening to my whines, thank you for showing your true self and thank you for choosing this way out of this friendship. ~~Now, I will just smile and only wave at you when I see you. Don't worry, I won't hate you. You are now, just a past.~~

I'm going to let my hatred out once and for all.
I have no intention to talk to an stupid person who annoys me non-stop, only talks to me when he needs help and also asking for help in a very impolite way. I don't know how I actually tolerate him for the past almost a year in poly. I am disappointed, very indeed - at myself. Why am I so stupid, so stupid to listen to you and do your bidding, shed useless tears when you hurt me and get scolded by other people for being stupid. Why? I did this all out of good will and yet you told me that you made use of me. I have never, ever met such a guy like him! Who doesn't treat a girl with respect, and don't bullshit about treating us differently because we are different, there should always be mutual respect that we are still afterall girls. No girls would want to keep hearing that they are fat, ugly whatsoever practically every single day. I am not fat mind you, I'm practically quite almost underweight for my hilariously tall height and about my looks, I don't give a crap on what you think!

You changed my life drastically, you made my self-esteem go down hill just within a year. I hate when you always brag about how capable you are as compared to me, and I don't want to hear sympathy words from you when I told you that I had no one to watch movies with. I'm not pathetic that I have no friends that I always have to rely on you for late night movies!

Yes, I've changed. My attitude towards you changed. I have no utter interest to talk to you when you call me. But you only call me and ask me things which you needed help with. Then you always hang up on me. Now the tables have turned. You hate it when people treat you the why you treat them, now it's time for you to have a taste of your own medicine. How do you like it? Do you know how it feels to be treated this way? You are always so full of yourself! I do not need to rely on you when I have problems like I have no one to talk to and those are not repayment to what assignments I helped you to complete. I have done more than enough for you, and yet all I ask in return for you was to treat me nicely! But you don't , you never!

Shin said that I have changed, good and bad both at the same time. She said that the good thing was that I finally woke up. Secondly, she said but I have become more evil and I was acting like a total bitch. She would understand too, how can one actually tolerate such nonsense of a guy for this long. I really have to thank my lucky stars that I didn't commit suicide over the pressure I'm receiving. An eye for an eye, you treat me nice and I'll treat you nice. I never will ever believe in love your enemy as your friend from now on.

How many times I cried of the things you said to me. Those hurtful words and not even a sorry. You cover up and said it was for my own good and I had to let all my emotions out. Those are totally bullshit, just because you hate to kill your pride especially you're in the wrong. You all men and those stupid prides! Even Shipeng says sorry to me for ditching us! You? Who was intentionally suppose to hang out with us at first, left with your other friends! My hatred towards you grow stronger each time I think of what you have done to us and me! You did more that just that, but in the fit of anger I can't seem to remember and all I think about now is that I want to step all over you with hot-blooded revenge!

Seriously I wished that I would have never met you! My life would be so much joyful without you! Everytime I open my mouth to complain to Penglin, it's always about you. Can you be more understanding?! These words never get to you, because I would not tell them straight to your face. Even if I would, I would throw a very huge fit at you and probably slapped you right across the face for what you have done. You are already turning 18 years old this year, grow up kid. Grow up! You are no longer a child and no one is going to spoon feed you! I've done it and I've had it. Stupid me, really stupid me. What was I really thinking?! To help you, score your stupid grades. Thinking that if I didn't help you, no one would. You played with my sympathy! You heartless resident asshole! Even the those wee little happy times we had together could not calm my anger down! Ugh. And I pray hard that I am not going to be in the same class as you for the next block. Even if I am, I'll make sure I sit far away from you so that you would target me to help you with your work, annoy me and also to keep saying insulting things about me!

I should be thankful that I'm not emotional scarred that I stereo type all guys like that, because I have guy friends that treat me way better than you! You treat me the lowest of the lowest! I asked you how was I to you? You hypocrite that told me that part of you treated me as a friend and the other was that you were making use of me. I asked you which and you didn't want to say. I asked you to consider my feelings, you told me you don't care. Your answer is clearly there. You don't care about my feelings because I was never your friend to begin with. Maybe you had that wee little feeling that you treated me as a friend but majority, it's what you untold answer was. You say that someday I will know the truth, but that day will never come. Even if it comes, I am no longer there to listen to it. And I hope that you would just leave me alone for now. Penglin asked, will I forgive you? The answer is No, but I would if I were to see perseverance in you wanting to save our friendship - that is never going to happen so the train of thoughts never came through my mind. I have totally given up all hope on you.

Pfft, I have had enough, I just have to let some gas off before I concuss for the night. I'm very sleepy as I didn't sleep well for the past few nights as I had ridiculous dreams and nightmares.
Today I work up early as well to help Penglin out at Xorex. I think I can kiss watching my movie byebye already because there is no time that we can make to watch it together. So I'll just go shopping tomorrow to get Jasmine's present and it's already her birthday today! Yes, and I also have presentation later which I would have to swallow. Sorry for all the obscenities that I've typed by the way.

G'night.

End of watercolours

2010-02-17T00:02:00.009+08:00

I was not really in the mood to produce awesomely bokeh photos. I just wanted to capture what I have done in this whole entire month, my hardwork! Tomorrow is gay day, and I am very very happy! Because it marks the end of the block and the end of project one! Yipppiieee!

Chinese New Year wasn't really that fruitful this year because we keep eating non-stop! It's like buffet one after another and I feel sick in the stomach. I can't eat as much as I use to because of the whole internal clock going haywire, and I only eat a meal a day. I think I can even pass off lunch and only eat dinner then I'm stuffed for the whole day. Yes, I didn't indulge myself into those pineapple tarts, bah kwa, loveletters, so I'm not buta-san no more!

And I shall insult you once again Ang Penglin on my blog! You, you you you you you you you asssssshooolllleeee. Went to watch Percy Jackson without us! And we decided to watch together after gay day and you watched it beforehand. I'm going to peel your black onion layers tomorrow when I see you! Hurrrr. And I also appreciate that you read my sacred blog! Lol. Because I don't think anyone else does. Blogging isn't really my cup of tea but I like to type out snippets of little unsavory things that happens in this mundane life.

Aneehs guitar is still at my house and I decided to use it instead of mine, sorry. I tuned it when I brought it back and within a few months it goes out of tune. My classical is still in tune please! So I attempt to play Blind by Lifehouse again. First time I got lazy because I didn't want to tune down my E to a D but I did now. I think the song works out pretty much fine along with singing. I think I need to get my electric guitar back soon, I miss playing guitar and I think I should switch to acoustic soon. I hate being unable to play high notes on classical guitar and they sound so out of pitch. The amount of money I got from my angbao is not even enough to cover an acoustic. I see people's fb statuses that they got lots of cash and they are banking in about $400. And me? I only got $104! Maybe it's because my other side of the family is in Hk, I can't get ang baos from them and this goes on for years already. I never once celebrated CNY in HK. And Andy Tan, is in HK!

Thou going to cheat, as I shall watch tomorrow's Sweetness in the Salt episode because I'm seriously very bored now. I'm not in the mood for games and I lack of things to watch. I'm not going to watch anime or whatsoever because I have no mood, or should I sleep?

Anyways, I have picked up on Jrock again. Quite interesting really. I got to download some of the backlist SID singles which I keep forgetting to get'em. Then I went to Alice Nine's official site and fell in love with the background music! Holy, I love Hana-e! I even set it as my ringtone! I don't really understand the MV or I'll give describing the MV a skip. Whats with the dancing lady? By the way, I Lol'd at Hiroto's hair. I like Shou's hair colour! I think I'll dye it that colour most probably soonish! I want Mao's haitstyle as well, but I will keep my long hair at the bottom, so at least I would not get called a boy again.

So I went to download Hana-e single, then I also realised that they released a album last year which I didn't keep track! I did keep track of Gazette's album though and I got DIM. Quite a disappointment, I still prefer DISORDER and NIL much better. Alice Nine is the only one which didn't change their music style, and I likes what I hear! :D

Oh oh, one more thing before I stop blogging. I watched Gazette Live playing Guren on youtube. There is something terribly wrong with Uruha's hair. It seems like it's made of furwig! It swishes like it has no gravity! It could only be that his hair is getting worst or he just have very light bouncy hair which I didn't notice through my 5 years of hearing Jrock. Lol.

My love for you was blind, I couldn't make you see it.

2010-02-12T00:43:00.009+08:00

Oh hai thar, I'm bored so I'm actually blogging! It be awesome right?
Firstly, I didn't sleep more than 2 hours today, I'm feeling rather cranky now.
So it's just going to be rants alittle here and there, bear with this ol'windbag please.

Ang Penglin, you better stop teasing me about me and that resident joker or I'll peel your black onion layers! Not that I'm really pissed, but it's really really annoying! I know that we haven't been talking for days, it's not surprising. Because we don't want to talk to each other so there is no need of a conversation. Besides, I will most definitely would NOT swoon over him even now he as dyed hair and has taken off his braces. Even though I admit that I would love him to have his braces off so whenever we talk, I don't see food stuck in his braces and he would stop spitting his saliva on my face. I saw him on monday but he didn't open his mouth to yak so I didn't take notice of his awesomely sparkly straight tooth. Hurrr. Then I dissappeared from the surface of the earth for the next few days hibernating at home with work and more work. ~~He's changed, maybe for the better. :)~~ he never changed. Still as pissing off as ever. But still, we are not .. uh, how to say. friends. Ha! It's payback time for what he has done to me!

Just one moment, I almost forgot until that "bot" decided to beep me on msn. I have no idea, why and why why why sex machine bots keep adding me on msn. Firstly, once I was in school it talked me. Asking whether I was a male or female whatsoever. So I typed male, just to play along the gag. Then she insisted that I should watched her naked. (Like, whut?) Penglin took over the conversation, and replied her that I was interested. Lol. she then asked me if had any favourite colour panties which I fancied. Pengs typed in pink and lacy! So yeah, she said that she had and she asked me to sign up for an account at this website and to ensure that I was of legal age, I would have to type in my VISA card number - something around this. Scammer! So Pengs continued and asked her if they accept India Credit Cards and she typed that I was a hairy Indian and was from India. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! She didn't reply! We were laughing hysterically because it's such a scam! Sorry if I put it in a way that I'm against Indians, but I'm not. It was suppose to frighten that person alittle but oh well. She is a robot afterall. They nudge then they talk to you. And after I blocked and deleted that email, since then till now about 10 sex bots added me! Am I in such high demand?! I'm not a male and neither am I interested, thanks.

Table is clustered with too many things. Left is taken 2 days before, Right was taken last night.

Okay okay, enough of those and back to what happened today. Because it was one of my not so once in a blue moon moments that I actually didn't sleep the whole night! Yeah, how awesome can Roy get? And with my other comp on at the same time, I was watching my drama as I worked my life through the night. I'm glad that I'm done already! The most ridiculous thing was I finished the whole drama series just in one night?!
So I decided to sleep for a wee while before I head out to print, so the alarm went off at 12.30pm and I was suppose to hit the toilets and get ready to head out! But I remembered that I had some amendments to make so I turned on my laptop, and I fell back asleep and woke up another hour later. So I rushed out of the house and reached NAFA around 3 plus. I was unhappily printing because the lady was really unhappy with me printing so many spreads and there was a long queue. Plus the fact that I annoyed her with my silly ridiculous questions like "Hey, would the bleed be accurate cause I need to be really accurate then I am able to cut!" So in the end I printed on 3 spreads then I though maybe I shouldn't have printed at Xorex. The lady at the counter told me that I need to make sure that my spread was right in the center of the A3 (Which mine isn't) so I panicked and quickly changed all the bleeding on my spreads and asking my mum to come down to help me pay up because I has not enough money! Once I finished and I thought I could finally print, then I realised that I over-saved the files on my lappie and not my thumbdrive so I have to retransfer everything! Yes, as expected that my comp keeps hanging and lagging that I couldn't do anything to help it so I sat outside Xorex and waited for 30 minutes for the things to transfer over. AND I'M SORRY NAFA STUDENTS FOR BARGING INTO YOUR SCHOOL PRINT SHOP TO PRINT EVEN THOUGH I HAVE XOREX PRINT SHOP AT MY SCHOOL BUT YOU DO NOT HAVE TO KEEP GIVING MY THE STUPID LOOK AS THOUGH I DID SOMETHING WRONG FOR HOGGING THE COMPUTERS, I MEAN THEY ARE OPEN FOR BUSINESS TOO RIGHT?! Best, some students even cut my queue. I feel so small.

Total printing was about $100 plus the paper and all the other stuff included. My 1 month of hardwork was in my hands, safe and hard-copied. After reaching home late, missed my 8pm Chnl 55 show, I started cutting the spreads one by one. Can you imagine how my eyes looked? Dead fish eyes. Y'know something like this >> (X_______X)

Now before I head to bed, I need to change the mistakes I made in my spreads and have them printed tomorrow (again) then bind the book together. You see me disappear from the surface of the earth soon after submission. Everyone would. So lets all kiss byebye to watching movies after presentation on Wednesday.

Sleep nao. (Actually no, feel like playing games. Ughhhhh.)No coffee would be able to lift my eyelids any longer!

MAMESHIBAAA D:

2010-02-09T04:09:00.004+08:00

Look at the sky, tell me what do you see? Just close your eyes and describe it to me. The heavens are sparkling with starlight tonight. Thats what I see through your eyes.

Phew, I actually gave up colouring 2D because I was already not in the mood. Time check now it's 4.15am and I'm still awake to give some snippets of what happened today! I slept that 7.30am mind you, and I was alerted that I had class later that day as well. My intention was to be late for class like I always do because I'm not consulting. I woke up earlier thanks to that resident joker who smsed me whether I was on the way to school. Heh. Of course I wasn't I was still rolling around in bed sleeping like a log but the sms just had to wake me up. Because he went to get his braces off that morning and he was wondering if he should head to school still. So I gave him those half-assed answers reply and later fell back asleep again not replying. The next time I woke up by my MAMESHIBA alarm tone, I gave up and dragged myself out of bed and head to school.

Sheesh, on the way there Pengs called me and told me that Jeff was no where in class. And she told me if I was on the way to school, I'm wasting my time. OH MY PRECIOUS SLEEPING TIME DOWN THE DRAIN. Since there wasn't class so I was dwelling myself into uh, that horribly disturbingly Heidi Nissan youtube video and annoyed the crap out of Veron. It be good! And Pengs put that stupid Qoo advertisement on loop which got rather annoying. Ugh damn.
I rolled around library till around 7 then I left to get my Generation Dead : Kiss of Life from BORDERS Parkway. I reached home at 9pm! How nice, east traveling to east takes me this amount of time which is equal to someone traveling down from Choa Chu Kang to TP. School journey sucks biggy. Oh, and I missed my 8pm drama.

I seriously cannot withstand watching star-cross lovers dramas, especially the one on Channel 55 - 8pm. I goes by the name of uh, Sweetness in Salt? Apparently the pairing which I ship would end up together, but the guy dies because some dude stabbed him. If he were to die by his terminal illness - diabetes, I foresee myself sobbing in from of the television once more. I don't know whether I should continue watching it, still have the tenancy to drop mangas or dramas which didn't end how I wanted it to be. Funny isn't it, that I didn't ship Tavia and Steven in the drama! I still prefer the sickly dude, maybe it's just my conscience being touched by him - thats all.

So I told Pengs and Veron that I was watching Old House has Joy. Pengs can go die because she has no childhood about watching dramas and Veron just goes "I do not like Vicki Zhao" Eep, one person down not wanting to watch 14 blades. Then I told her, Alec, Alec is that handsome dood that I'm watching for and she just rolled eyes at me because I told her he's the one acting as Wu Ah Ge in the HZGG series! Hurrrr. He is be handsome! But that was more than 10 years ago, I'm not sure about now ok. And I'm still waiting for someone to watch 14 Blades with me! I do not want to ask or watch with Edward alone because it's .. uh. gross. Lol.

Ups for Percy Jackson too! Which we would be watching as well after p1, hopefully.
Valentines Day, I'm still thinking whether to watch because that day we'll be celebrating Jasmo's birthday as well and I have no idea where to get awesome tote bag. Would have to do shopping this thursday at Bugis after I get all my stuff printed. Stress, I swear. Will be baking again this weekend, I'm trying out the recipe which I took from one of the Cooking magazines during the trip to the library in the beginning of P1. It's chocolate related. Yumm! Can't wait to kick up those badass workload, curl up in bed watch my drama or read my novels shouting "Happy days are finally here!"

How cliche it gets when you know that Old House has Joy's opening theme song is "Yue Liang Dai Biao Wo De Xing", shall refrain from watching in the afternoon or else my dad would mock at me for life.

Alrighty, one episode of drama before I head to Lala-land. I'm not actually sleepy can you believe it? But my energy doesn't give me the enthusiasm to finish my work. So cover page and one more spread to go. Actually I want to cancel that spread out of my list because I already hit over the total amount of graphical pages there would be. I'll see how it goes tomorrow.

Cheers!

Running the last lap

2010-02-07T18:00:00.003+08:00

I can't wait for PLASTIC BEACH to be out! Counting down to 6th March ;D
Surprisingly working with the Gorillaz for my P1 still doesn't make me hate the band or such but yet, make me love them even more! (usually it's like that, you tend to hate something after dwelling in it too much - that was what happened to kuroshitsuji)
I've unleashed my inner Gorillaz fandom once again, thank you P1! After all these years since they released Demon Days.

I need to get all my stuff done by this week and I think I am able to manage it pretty well even though my whole body clock has turned haywire because I'm sleeping in early morning and waking up in late afternoons. Then it works like this all over again. But I did managed to get my CNY Shopping done yesterday! Even though I was pretty upset that I couldn't buy many many awesome pretty clothes and mom didn't allow me to get DC Heroes shirts again because I have too many! Other than that, Kino doesn't carry Generation Dead : Kiss of Life and it was out of stock in BORDERS Wheelock! Means I have to make a trip to Parkway BORDERS again (from school) to get the book. This is so troublesome!

Actually many things happened since the last time I blogged here, it was pretty upsetting as I was going through problems and more problems with people. I guess everything is fine now as it is, and I thank those who worry about me to even call and sms me how was I feeling. Thank you so much for the encouragement especially Penglin the BLACK for telling me not to give up. I never thought that would happen especially in Poly school life, to have problems with friends. Oh well. What is over is over, now we are all chionging for the last lap of P1! We will work hard!
Then after that, we'll head done to watch movies like we always do and no more splitting classes because the next class, we're all together once again!

I'm actually losing out on alot of things, like Janice flying off to Aussie to study and the last time I saw her was during SOY and we only exchanged a few words. Yang flying off the next day of SOY when I couldn't make time to send her off. Missing out Timberwolf as he went back to USA when I didn't even gotten a chance to meet him up for lunch. T-T

Sorry for the randomly changing topics of each paragraph, I'm lazy to type in proper english that I'm doing this. Anyways, I'm gonna reveal the drama that I am watching while I do my work. Penglin keeps saying that I always watch old dramas, I like them so why not? The last time she came over and she saw I was watching like whut, 9 year old drama and she mocked at the couple rolling down the hill (rings the bell somehow). Now this is not rolling down the hill together with mah boyfriend and girfriend drama. I'm watching Old House has Joy, and the cast is actually Alec Su and Vicki Zhao (Main Cast for HZGG if you please). I swear, dammit that Alec is super handsome even he is half bald in HZGG series, but in modern outfit .. he looks .. "D8" Too skinny, and I thought he was alittle plump. HAHA! Yes, he is be handsome and I actually found out that I have a friend that looks like him! Not exactly the same but, looks alittle similar. Wow!

I'll quit blogging now, mum is going to slaughter me because we are heading out for dinner and I haven't changed! Thankfully that I have finally decided not to chop my long hair even I threatened to do so because it was annoying the crap out of me especially in such hot weather!
OKAY! I NEED TO GO. AND I WANT TO WATCH 14 BLADES, ANYONE WHO WANNA WATCH JUST PM ME ON MSN OR FB OK?!

New year, New start? Too late maybe

2010-01-17T16:26:00.003+08:00

Thank you Tsuyin for introducing this really cute anime to watch. It's really nice!
I never thought I would find an anime person looking so much like Veron (actually many, like Sunako from wallflower, Mio? Eh, that was Uriah.) Although I was reminded that it is somewhat similar to one of the mangas I've actually read online, but blah. Slice of life is always like that, I mean what more dramatic can it get? I changed back to my old blogspot link, I've always preferred this one and was forced to change when the links were not working that time.
Okay, so production work will start later because I have stuff to do now. I needs to shoo my parents out of the house, bake something then do my work.Tonnes of drawings to do and I'm not sure I'm in the mood for all. I want my holiday back please for it's too short.

I'll update when I have the mood, now I gotta shower then leave zee house!

Okay, an update from class now. Got a picture of the cheesecake yesterday. It came out quite good. The side was of a cleaner cut than the last time I baked the cake. So I started out alittle on my of my layouts of the hand journal, I guess it's okay but having to think I have so much to draw, I'm actually afraid I cannot finish in time :/

Goaway projects!

2010-01-09T01:14:00.003+08:00

I totally cannot stand having Japanese class because it's freaking boring to the max.
I slept through class because I dead tired and I didn't seem much the past few days doing work till the wee hours then head to school for morning 9am classes. This block is really crap, hate the morning classes timing , damn CDS. Besides I cannot tolerate a certain someone in class who keep yakking away and also mocking people who talks like anime characters?

My proposal isn't coming well so I'm like so-so not in the mood in doing anything because I lack of the motivation to do all my research. I am actually more keen to work on my layout instead because I'm following Jamie Hewlett style and it's teh awesome.

I found out that 2D got a an ex-girlfriend who used to be in the band? But after some issues with Murdoc blah blah, she was out and then in comes Noodles. It was actually quite interesting to find scans online with 2D giving Paula flowers, I think it's rather cute! But I didn't actually seen her face because it was backview and Murdoc calls her "Depressingly Ugly". Heh!

Moments like fireworks firing up.

2010-01-02T21:43:00.008+08:00

I look like trannie, damn gay to be exact. Putting very little makeup for a wedding dinner. Waiting for my movie to load and I'm stuck home this weekend sleeping away, it is good!
My FF crashed just now so I have to reload my whole entire movie again! Dixv player takes super long to load can, and I am bored waiting so I'm actually blogging. Have I mentioned that I got a new Laptop? It is be sexay, I likes red laptop and it's lighter than Pengs and Joanne's. But it catches dust quite easily and it's shiny surface makes the dust visible too.

I spent a total of 3 hours deciphering "ACUTE" as I do not really know the true hidden meaning behind the song even though I watched it many times. It's actually Miku's fault and she is the third party, not Luka. From first glance, it looks like it was Luka's fault. Veron is very teh biased against Luka because it's going against her Kaito!Miku pairing and she is starting to hate the song. LOL.
It's a great song okay, of guys being flirts. She just had to compare Kaito to Makoto from School Days. Ugh, bad comparison because it's Makoto the asshole who accepts all girls thrown at him and have sex with them even though he doesn't like them - all to ease his stupid disgusting sexual pleasure. Kaito is .. merely just having affairs. 8D

OH YES, watched the ending of school days again and laughed my ass off. Now that I watch it again, I think it's rather hilarious because Makoto deserves it. Then suddenly I thought of like, Sekai as Miku and Katsura as Luka. But then Luka didn't go to the extend to kill Miku lah, unlike Katsura who slit Sekai's abdomen to see whether she had Makoto's baby. LOL @ Description of death again. And I also finally understand the meaning of 'Nice Boat'. Oh Makoto, you fail. You fail in being a guy. And I hope no stupid girls will end up like the girls in this anime. Obsessive much?

HEYPI NEW YEAR 2010

2010-01-01T04:26:00.005+08:00

This song is rather addictive these days. Actually for weeks already.

Oh hey! Just got home awhile ago, showered and now snuggling up my bed to type this entry. I just remembered last year, countdown was spent in the 158 bus home from hanging out and then I ran out to watch the fireworks. Was happy.

Had a major hangover just now before countdown and it was an awful sight. Just called pengs when I just started vomiting. And she told me that she hear me going "blehhhhhh blehhhhhh" into the plastic bag. There goes my dinner. Out of my stomach just before it could digest well. I think I should really not drink with a full stomach, it makes you feel damn weird. I really hate the taste of puking as well. To sum it all, I really hate having hangovers! But after puking, I was back to normal unlike before which I was crying like some mad cow. This is the second time it happened, and darn! Need to train my alcohol level, it's really crappy. Even Tsu can hold her alcohol better than me. ; - ;

You know what? I actually gave up. I was speechless when he just keep rattling on and I have no time to think of what to say. His words came out like a machine gun and I couldn't adsorb it well or fast enough because I was practically in a very zoning out mood just before. What else can I do now? I have no ego to face him anymore. Maybe it's a good thing that we are in different class, he lead his own and I lead my own. And I really hope that this would not affect the other people who are in the clique because it's really hard to communicate when everyone's in different class. Even though I missed him being next to me and annoy me all the time, because now I'm almost quite lonely even though I have Pengs and Gen around me. Yes, I admit I miss his presence around, miss the times he always teases me, not that I am thinking otherwise all the time. How many times I would want to tell him that I miss him but I just can't say it out. Because most of the time he doesn't give me his full attention and he might not sort of, uh understand. He didn't tell me that he was rumored with me during camp and the people gossiping don't even personally know us. I thought he was affected but he was not, and he claims that I was thinking too much? I don't think so, really. Even someone as dumb as me would know, and he is trying to hide the obvious that he was avoiding me somehow? I really don't understand, and I never will plus neither did I try. I don't bother most of the time because I ALWAYS feel that I should be the one being bugged by his non-stoppable retarded questions about my own being. I expect too much from him, seriously, and I always end up being upset because he doesn't do what I expected. It's my fault that I think that way. Sometimes I would really wish that he would treat me nicer instead of teasing me all the time, but I guess now it doesn't really matter. And if YOU happened to read this entry typed out on News Year Day, I would like you to know that you're a great friend, I really do miss you and I do not want you to avoid me.

Alrighty, New Years Resolution! Can't really think properly now, but I'll type what I can remember:

More money will roll into my pocket

Increase my GPA and do well in design even though I suck at it.

Mum and Dad to be healthy

To be strong, physically, mentally and emotionally

Stop treating people for granted

Stop making penglin in the tight spot all the time

Stop having so much cosplay plans that I can't seem to count how many
etc.

The List goes on because Imma sleepy now and I want to hit the sack.
I predict it would be an awesome year, I'll work hard to make it happen!
Cheers and goodnight! Wedding dinner tomorrow which I have to attend.

2009-12-31T15:29:00.005+08:00

How much would a person understand? The feeling of always being uncared of.
The two people who used to cared, are not longer there - carried on with their lives. The one which I thought would cared is no longer here. And other those that I thought would cared are not doing anything because they thought they care but are not, and ignore you when you are upset, or don't even bother to ask you whether you are upset. They care for their other friends asking them if they were okay, asking what is going on but not for me. Why? Because only that person who would care would ask? But that person is not there anymore, not here anymore. I feels like it. The world comes crashing down on you, just right on new years eve.

I think I'm too pampered when it comes to this type of things, I don't feel cared when no one asks me and nobody no does. Those who once cared are no longer here, as for those 3 people and also my ex-classmates.

Why?

Time, so wasted

2009-12-28T17:25:00.005+08:00

I practically went to school around 9am to find out that CDS doesn't start till Wednesday.
I wasted my time waking up early when I could still have my beauty sleep at home as I didn't sleep well the night before. Anyways, we got our new assignment which is a total of 2 blocks and I have no idea on which to touch on yet.
I'm still hanging onto the deadly sins idea as I really want to base at least one of my project on it.
The themes which we can choose from is kindda all shitty and I'm still contemplating. Shall do some research later when I'm feeling not so lazy.

Dad told me that Caocao's grave was found and it's great news in China? What happened to the boy who got straight As and then died within an hour because he was too happy? Why does China always have such shocking news? I wonder if Caocao and the rest of the dynasty era knows that the 3 states are made into a playable PlayStation game up in heaven. Phuuushhhh!

I went to read some mangas since I was procrastinating not to watch tales of 2 sisters and black dahlia. Will watch later I guess? It's actually quite cliche that the girl got married to her teacher because her family died and left her and her little brother. The teacher is a freaking hot, glasses wearing, black hair male which is damn dreamy to the max can! Like who doesn't want such a teacher and yet, got married to him. Even though I hate the fact that they are 8 years apart because that's too much and the girls' only 16. - Not even legal to get married yet. PHAILS.

A few more days to a new year, hopefully a better year for me because this year it one of the worst years man. Problems everywhere and I have to work equally hard to achieve something which others could have done easily. Based on saying that next year would be a good year for me! Hopefully stupid P1 would pull up my GPA and I would stop having to tolerate people's bullshit all the time.

Yeah! It'll be good!

NONG AGO, ROY REIGN THE WORLD WITH HER AWESOMESAUCE

2009-10-24T00:29:00.009+08:00

Piao piao / Vonning ma / Boku wa kawaii Chrome / Chillen's maid ,
I hope you had a wonderful birthday last week! Back dated as usual because Roy gets lazy and cranky about stuff.

Oh yes, school started and it's crazily hectic because it sucks so much not to have pork head and my parents in my class! *jeers* assignments rushes in like the strong waves from the sea and drown us all in it. Painting and painting, I'm sick of mixing colours. The timetable is crappy because I have a 3 hours long break in between the 2 modules and they spent monday - wednesday watching movies in the library. Except that I played PSK on Tuesday to have lunch with AABBCC at Astons! And Wednesday I saw someone pleasing to my eye (++++ it's his birthday today!) as he looks pretty much the same when I first met him and he recognized me! He waved at me and yes, the million dollar smile! HAHAHAHAHA! Not only that, I met up with Verse and Ashley! (那天，本小姐心情很好喔。) New sem, means meeting friends from the other IMD B class. It does seems awkward though because I never knew anyone from the other class except for Dawn.

Tired Tired, I want to sleep. Brain's dead already but my hair's still wet because I came home quite a while ago. Is very very lazy now, indeed. Tomorrow it's KTV, I have to enjoy myself before I suffer the pain of eating and staying back in school late to do 2D art. Most probably won't see me online much as well. Anything urgent, contact my phone! Guess what? I am so not inspired to do any creative story writing at all and I got to get 3 plots done by next week. How anticipating life can get *note sarcasm

Ps, I miss watching my 500 days of summer. Thanks black pengs! You owe me my movie since you forced me and Edward to watch your stupid Meatball show in 3D!

FML. KTHXBAI

2009-10-15T01:32:00.008+08:00

I'm not going to rant, because I know that I'm unable to sit down and nicely type up a proper wanking post because I will lose my interest pretty fast.

Throughout the whole entire holiday month, the number of times I got last minute pang-saed is fucking alot that even it feels like my fingers can't count it. How fucking annoying is it uh? I do say it out, but it just doesn't seem to get to the person which I am pissed with because I won't tell them at all. Yes, pity those that would have to listen to my rants about it. Oh, I'm not going to do that now because I'm not in the fucking mood to talk to anyone.

My pet peeves, I wonder if ANYONE EVEN KNOWS. I fucking hate the fact that when I'm serious, no one ever knows and they just keep talking on and on which makes me totally just to slaughter them. I know most of the time I'm not so serious on whatever I do or say, so is it my fault for not showing this side of me to them sooner? Because this happened more than enough shitzxz times that I can't even bother to start counting. Even if I'm angry, can't they tell? Or what? Being oblivious about it? When I mean I'm not in the mood to talk, I don't give a totally shit about the other person. Being self-centered is always good sometimes because most people are always being so self-centered and I ALWAYS have to endure that fucking crap.

Well, I do have other pet peeves that I don't think I should type it out. I really reckon that I don't get angry that easily; but if I'm pissed .. it is something very huge. Ja?

Enough. Not in the mood and this is going to put a wet blanket on my mood for next few days. Needs to find something to occupy myself again, luckily I just found one or esle I just can't help but to start thinking and be angry all over again.

Love or Bread?

2009-10-14T01:14:00.008+08:00

Zhi shu! zhi shu! zhi shu! Why are you so different in 我的億萬麵包. Total 360 degree change from 恶作剧之吻/恶作剧2吻. My brain broke, I swear. I think I understand why Joanne calls him O-mouth because in Love or Bread, he keep making funny faces and it's not very glam. What happened to the cool Zhi Shu!??!?! /crawls on the ground.
JOSEPH ZHENG YUANCHANG is soooooooo x infinity handsome! I'm going to get bricked for this but I don't care. Reila say I like him because he's 1.88m tall. But he's also handsome what! I'm actually quite glad that in this series Ariel isn't that oh-help-me-i'm-a-damsel-in-distress because it's actually quite annoying that she keeps thinking Joe is her life (in ISAWK) but now the stupid one is Joe (in LOB). Pfft. The reason I watched ISAWK is because that time Veron sang the theme song during ktv and I thought the plot of the mv was kinda similar to my plight(at that time) so I went to watch it. I also start to think that she resembles me alittle because of her being all so stupid and all. This isn't very coaxing to myself when I typed that. >_>
Anyways, I thought that the show is about Joe being a baker because of the title, then I realised that Bread is the term used for money like the word "Breadwinner".

Another thing that broke my brain...

This guy wants to kill my braincells, it all happened last week and until now I still keep watching him sing his songs. he's from united kingdom which also killed my braincells (mocks at fiona, your people can't beat the americans) he's has this very high screechy voice and it's totally just a turn off. ugh. I'm just sick in the brain that I just keep watching him and I even subscribed to him on youtube!

Nicole Scherzinger is damn freaking skinny that it keeps taunting me when they sang jai ho during ktv yesterday. oh my god, I want to be as skinny as her! eeeeep! it's so annoying that I can't sing chinese duet songs, jasmine don't know how to sing! Please go learn and don't make me double role my singing again, it's hard to switch high pitch and low pitchzxzxzxzxzxz.

Oh yeah, I cut my hair! ......
Okay, I lied, I did not it's just that I was trying out the wig for my JBF shoot and I still need to cut the wig alittle shorter. My fringe isn't that long though. It's my sebby wig and since I'm never ever going to do him again so I guess I'll cut it. I think I suit the hairstyle! But my mum said it looks like a boy. Maybe I'll keep my fringe long, layer the top then keep a long tail behind, I'm kindda sick of styling my hair everyday before I go out. I always smell like hair gel or hair spray. I'm also not in the mood to blog now because my drama is calling out to me plus I'm going to have a good day tomorrow! Some pictures will be up I guess. It's so going to be fun!

Let's end this post with Penglin, the asshole who got me an uneven tan because we went cycling under the noon day sun. Thank you, for calling me crabstick and mock at me when my skin peels. You will never get away as we're FOREVER going to call you black throughout your years in poly life. /evil laughter

LIKE HOMG?

2009-10-05T16:36:00.007+08:00

Prettays up on Livejournal because I was bored.

AJKSHJAGDJAHSKAHJKSA, Can I like, rip off the little boy's arm? Sadistic I know, gah! But this boy is talented and I love him so much! Young genius just ascended down to earth with an amazing bowl-cut hairstyle. Vill be vanting to rip the video for mp3, then roy is going to be a happy kid :B

You're unlike any other!

2009-09-21T23:38:00.012+08:00

Sorry, I just really have to post this up because someone is so damn cute in this picture! ♥♥
To those who know who he is, just shut up k? Because I do not usually say he's cute or he will be all so narcissistic like that. And I look so shit in the photo because I just took out my wig and my hair is all flipped back due to the hairnet. Taken on Toycon when I did Mukuro and that moron's bag got burnt, which was nong nong ago. This picture was supposedly to be deleted but it found it's way through bluetooth to Veron and surprise. It's here to haunt! It will be my pretty display picture for now! Haha!

Anyways, holidays started last Thursday and I'm totally just shagged because I only had Friday to rest then I have to help out at GCA on Sunday. Yes, I slacked on Saturday too because it was catching up time with Cosplay buddies! I think I really missed out alot due to school and I totally can't seem to relate myself to cosplay as much as I used to be before Poly life started. It's a reality wake up call and I got smacked real hard on this. But I'm happy! I sort of miss the life of hanging out after classes and having lunch all those. And yet, looking at my previous post about wanting my holidays to start so we can do all sorts of stuff together. How can we do so when everyone's not free on days?

Heck about all those because it's putting a wet blanket on my mood now. I had a awesome day because it feels I went for a major shopping spree! I had new shoes, new clothes, new wigs. LOL! Not that I'm balding but it's for cosplay k? I got my SMS school logo printed on and I sort of have a hard time ironing it on just now trying not to burn it somehow. My costume looks more completed except for my cargo pants which I haven't bought. Now to crack my brains on how to make elf ears! My hand moisturizer - the one that penglin said it stink like some old ahma's hand cream decided to spill in my bag today! How nice. And my umbrella has gotten an oily dip along with my ipod. No worries, I like the smell except for some people (hints) and I should be thankful that it was not water or I will cry trying to find a way to dry my bag up when I have tonnes of other shit to carry today!

Food fair was awesome and I'm high on garlic bread and in which, Michi was too; yesterday! I went back today and gotten myself another packet of it along with chilli tapioca etc. It was so filling! Yum! But I left the place smelling like BBQ!
Plus, I got approached by some lady to ask me to donate money to some charity organization. No worries about donating but I must be at least 21 and above to do so! I don't think much people will get the hint, but it's actually trying to say that I LOOK OLD. I LOOK LIKE AN ADULT WHEN I AM NOT. Maybe I should stop wearing frilly gay girly tops and wear more of my super heroes series shirt .. perhaps this way, I can look younger! Roy also has to learn to keep her distance away from Armani Exchange boutique .. I'm getting tempted by more belts and their awesome galore! Help!

I AM GONNA HAVE A GOOD DAY. Y/Y?

2009-09-13T02:00:00.010+08:00

THIS IS SPARTAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
Downloaded the photos from Michi's cam that were taken doing the US/UK shoot! Took this more than one month ago? And it looks like a wake up call to go get some diet done because my legs looks like elephant thighs!!

I am dead tired, but I ain't sleeping yet! Because I feel I should let the food in my stomach digest first! I feel like I ate like a pig today because I had awesome awesome crab noodles just now! Thanks Alex for bringing me there because I know nuts about getting around Singapore without being lost or feeling as though I'm not in the country. IT Fair was good! But it was a tad crowded and I don't know how many times I've stepped on Alex's shoes. LOL! Sorry! Bought this yellow sticky thing which can be used to clean the dirt off the keyboard. I tried it just now; it feels gross and smells like lemons! I managed to get some dirt out of my keyboard. I will use it again on Monday to get rid of more dirt because I'm feeling all so lazy now. Even as to blog!

Now, I seriously can't wait for holidays! Then I can have my late night movies, more ktv outings, more slacking at everywhere outings, run around the supermarket playing with the trolley, hijacking into facebook statuses, run around marina barage like monkeys etc. Maybe we should organize a chalet or something. The semester is ending this Thursday and I'm stuck with my final project. Guilty for not starting it yet until Monday because I want to have my awesome weekend out!

I feel so bad for not staying out late last night Reila dear, D:
And I asked whether I could join you and I left early cause my contacts were hurting. Had them on for more than 12 hours and it was killing my eyesight! Plus I can so totally see my eyebags in the picture, ugh! Too much of late night sleepings! Oh! And and thank you Chi for accompanying me and become my personal shopping/hanger/dumper/size finder human/maid for the day while I shopped for my DC Heroes shirts. Don't feel bad that you owe me money, because I can get it back from you anytime. We are classmates right? You can't run! (snickers)

This post so totally feels like an apology and a thank-you-so-much-i-love-you-like-deep-deep-post prz. I am hoping that my shift ends early tomorrow so I can get the belt which I have me yearning/dreaming about it since I first laid my eyes on it! Belt, you wait for me, you!

Undramatically

Gazette Meme

Duh duh duh.

FLOW + AFA11

The only one who failed chinese in the whole class.

Verge of giving up when you stood back up.

Everyone judges you.

U KW WHEN U R NOT APPRECIATED...

RIP : Isshi

Motivation, you know I loop this song forever.

加藤くんー誕生日おめでとう～～！

You are NOT an exception for your disrespectfulness!

Tough thoughts

Come Stai?

♕ is Kato san, for I am ♞

Turning point

*:..｡o○☆ﾟ Update です ･:,｡*:..｡o○☆

言いたいだけ, 言いたいだけ,言いたいだけ

High school senpai Shigeaki, High school love. Ahh Shiawase~

Rather than gathering words to speak, just use a kiss.

Everyone got shot in the head, and acted wonky.

Sore eyes, they totally kick in.

還有這個好友已經足夠

Blow wind Blow

New Year brings in new aspects!

直到你不找我

I wants, very much desu

MERRY CHRISTMAS WITH RANTS.

God'am stupid

TROUBLE TROUBLE TROUBLE. THEN YOU SHOOT SHOOT SHOOT FALLING LADY, THEN HOOT HOOT HOOT (ﾉಥ益ಥ）ﾉ

TO THE PRINCE OF ALL KINGS AND QUEENS AND UNDER EARTHLINGS ALL BURRIED UNDER YOU MAJESTIC SELF. HOHOHOHOHO.

Eat plastic surgery

我不想做小女人呢！ (PART 2)

Look, just look at that look

No one wants to entertain me

蓮，突然浸在深红色。。。

我不想做小女人呢！

你以为。

I AM NOT, A PSYCHOTIC WOMAN.

BBRI- BOBOBO- BOBBA- A

HAHAHAHAHA. I'M TWO-TIMING.

Hello, I'm Roy and I'm the legendary last airbender.

TIme for Confessions / Time for Change

Baby, you breaking my heart. Baby, you hurting my heart.

I WAS WRONG WRONG WRONG

EVENTFUL, YES. AND I HAVE TO SAY I'M IN LOVE.

Reality vs. Fiction

Even now I just keep calling your name.

Neither here nor there.

Know where you stand.

The bond between us has come apart and is dying away everyday

Io non sono affetti da indigestione

If only there's such a book.

Cosfest '10 / Clearing up problems and it's solutionz

Insignifiance, as always

Sentimental thoughts / "Time flies like houseflies"

Crazy, Brilliant, Radiant, you.

SM =/= Sausage McMuffin

It's a small world afterall.

I Need food. kthxbai

My throat is beh killing me!

OHYEY. I HAS BREAK NAO.

You can't fight fate, but you can change fate

Setiment and righteousness, it is like a black and white situation

trap!sammul is love ♥

踊る踊る眠らせてと踊る 止まぬ涙

Fuzzy Llama, Funny Llama, Llama Llama duck!

My name is Samon, first name Suzie.

I is beh beriberi hungry naozxzxz.

The man in the Blue suit, the man in the Pink suit.

DO WHAT YOU CAUSE A PIRATE IS FREE. YOU ARE A PIRATE

Nothing box and it's nothingness.

Did you get my sign, sign?

IS BE BORED.

L O V E is just another word I'll never learn to pronounce.

The perfect scent

You are just !@#$%^&*(*&^%$#@!

End of watercolours

My love for you was blind, I couldn't make you see it.

MAMESHIBAAA D:

:..｡o○☆ﾟ Update です　･:,｡:..｡o○☆

踊る踊る眠らせてと踊る止まぬ涙

You are just !@#$%^&(&^%$#@!